Odd Mondays
by DR. Elsac2
Summary: It was an odd monday when they first met, and when they meet again, Michonne has to admit that it gets odder. He does not remember her, and it might be for the best because she had to live with reminders of him.
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own the walking dead. **

**An: This is going to be a short story. We know each other by now. Don't start to threaten me because y all can't handle a sprinkle of angst. In this it is minimal.**

**Please, review**

* * *

**Prologue**

* * *

Rick searches through his locker, and he is sure that he left his scrub there. After a few minutes of pointless search, he groans and gives up the hunt. He must have forgotten to give it to the cleaning service. Rick sighs at his first hiccup of the day, and there is no worse way to start his day than not having a scrub to wear.

He looks at the locker next to him, and Rick's frustration grows. He checks his watch, and he is ten minutes late for his shift. As a thumb of rules, Rick hates Monday. Something always goes bad, and he dejectedly allows his head to fall down. The locker winces at the contact between Rick's head and its door.

"It's eight, and you look like shit, Rick." The voice of his best friend laced with amusement fills Rick's ear while Shane's arms yank him away from his locker. "What is it this Monday? Got your dick locked in a zipper?" Shane asks as he begins to open his locker.

"You know I deal with children and they have a better sense of humour," Rick says with exasperation.

Shane remains unfazed, and he knows Rick tumultuous affair with a Monday. He throws his white coat into his locker, and he begins to switch from his scrub to his clothes. Shane yawns, and he is barely standing.

"So what's up? New patient?" Shane gives a concerned look to his best friend.

"I hope not…" Rick quickly says, and he knows it sounds bad.

However, Rick hates to start a Monday with new patients. The day is already awful, but a new patient can only make it horrid. Sometimes, he regrets picking his speciality.

"Just forgot to give my scrub for cleaning, and now I have to deal with puke and all body fluids." Rick sighs, and he reached for his coat.

He looks at his clothes, and he could be worst. At least, he is not wearing designer clothes like Shane. Not that he could afford Shane lavish lifestyle and closet, he was not a surgeon, and Shane was renown in his field.

"You could have just asked," Shane leans to pick a clean scrub from his locker, and he unceremoniously throws it at Rick. "Also Maggie was looking for you." He adds while Rick begins to slide into the scrubs.

"Couldn't have say it before, I mean with have spent ten minutes here." Rick checks his watch, and he groans at how late he is

"Night shift brain…" Shane shrugs, and he closes his locker, "yeah, she said you are going to outpatient today instead of Wednesday." He finishes.

"Shane, anything else?" Rick expresses his frustration, and he throws his coat over the scrubs.

"Nah," Shane nonchalantly says, and he cares little for Rick's bad mood because he knows his friend has a love and hate relationship with his job. "See you tomorrow," He adds while Rick begins to stroll out of the room.

"I don't think so," Rick replies, "Nightshift." He finishes as he begins to rush toward the outpatient department.

Rick already dreads it, and now, he is sure to have a bunch of new patients. He truly hates Mondays.

* * *

The small hand grabs her silk pants, and Michonne redirects her attention from her son to her daughter. Big blue eyes stare at her with expectation. Michonne glances at her watch, and she is thirty minutes late.

"What is it, Judith?" Michonne softly asks as she lifts her daughter from the floor.

Judith swallows, and she carefully grabs her mother shoulders. Her timid nature makes an appearance while they are away from home. She leans to whisper in her mother's ear.

"Pee…" Judith quickly says, and she pulls away from Michonne.

Michonne looks at her daughter and then to her son. He sits straight in his chair. His small feet dangle back and forth. He looks good, and she tells herself to remember that he looks better than he did a week ago.

"Can it wait?" She asks already knowing the answer.

Judith looks at her mother, and she waits for a second to think about her answer. Once she has come to a final decision, Judith pulls again on her mother's pants.

"I have to peeeeeee…" She whines, and Michonne sighs.

Michonne looks at her wristwatch and the clock on the wall. She has patiently waited thirty minutes since the nurse called for their name.

"Okay," Michonne resigned herself, and she stands from the chair to take her daughter's hand. "Give me a minute, Jude."

Michonne crouches in front of her son, and she cups his cheek in her hand. She looks at him to make sure that no hair is out of place. She smiles when she notices that he has regained some colour. Michonne remembers that she has to hold on faith and hope.

"Mommy is going to be right back, RJ" She presses a kiss on her son's cheek, "and you are going to sit quietly until I come back." She finishes, and any other day Michonne would not leave him out of her watch.

However, a Judith tugging at her pants is an emergency. Above all, she does not know how anything bad can happen while RJ quietly sits in the office of the doctor who wasted thirty minutes of her precious time.

"Just a minute," Michonne says to quiet her own anxiety, and she continues to have that strange feeling. "And please no exploring." She adds well aware of RJ's curiosity.

"Okay, mama." RJ nods with a mischievous smile, but Judith pulling on her pant is too much of a distraction for Michonne.

"Let's go find the bathroom," Michonne takes back Judith's hand, and she is grateful that Sasha took Carl to his karate training.

As much as she loved being a mom, Michonne still had to deal with triplets. Three five years old kids were a lot of work, and even with help, it always felt as if she had too much on her plate. Michonne shoves those thoughts away, and she has very little choice in the matter.

* * *

"I'm terribly sorry for being late," Rick says while he enters Maggie's consultation room.

Rick hated when he had to switch days, but he couldn't say no to Maggie. Rick looks around him, and he might have been too late. He comes out of the room to check.

"There are no patients in, Tara," Rick says as he glances at the empty office.

His eyes fall on medical history in his hand. Rick waits for Tara to inform him, and she quickly raises her head from the appointment list.

"The Barnes should be in, but they might have left," Tara says, and she studies the list for the next patient. "The next patient is coming in an hour." She apologetically adds.

Rick sighs, and his frustration with the day continues. He returns to the office, and he goes to sit. Rick's feet hit something, and he leans to see what hides under the desk.

A pair of deep hazel eyes blink at his sight, and Rick guesses that he found his patient. A smile appears on Rick's face, and he extends his hand for RJ to take.

"Hello?" Rick chases the previous annoyance in his voice, and he likes that part of his job.

The children always made it worth, and this little boy with his big staring eyes already started to brighten his day. RJ looks at Rick's hand with a small, but he eventually takes it.

"Hello," He tries to mimic Rick's drawl, "Who are you?" RJ asks with a serious frown.

Rick looks at the little boy, and RJ's curious eyes almost feel familiar. He chases the thought to focus on the question. Rick does not know who has taught him a scold, but he is good at it.

"Doctor Grimes," Rick obliges RJ.

The little boy comes out of the table, and he stands in front of Rick. He does not have the most please look, and Rick's cheeks redden with embarrassment.

"You are late; very late," RJ says with a chastising tone, and he seizes Rick's wrist to point at his watch.

Monday, Rick has no other explanation for this scene, and a toddler has lectured him on his tardiness. Rick slightly blushes, and he looks at the little boy with an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry about that." Rick sincerely says, and he waits for the little man's answer.

"It's okay, but don't do it again." RJ ceremoniously says, and he moves away from Rick to return to the chair, which he previously occupied.

"I promise," Rick feels compelled to say, and RJ nods as he takes the words in consideration. "Now, where is your dad?" He asks with slight gaucherie, and RJ responds with an empty stare as if he does not understand. "Sorry, where is your mom?"

"Pee," He replies while he struggles to return to his seat.

Rick leaves his seat, and he goes to RJ. He picks the toddler, and he carefully places him on the chair. Rick reflexively ruffles RJ's hair.

"All set," Rick says, and he returns to his seat.

For a minute, they sit in silence. RJ touches everything, which catches his attention on the table. Rick does not mind as long as the toddler familiarised with the pieces of equipment, which he might need to use on him. He stares at the boy, and there is a familiarity to him. However, Rick can't put a finger on what feels so familiar. Rick crosses his arms, and RJ does the same.

"Don't tell mama that I was exploring?" RJ breaks the silence, and he looks at Rick as he waits for a promise of silence.

"Okay, I won't tell anything." He agrees, and they fall back into quietness.

Rick decides to read RJ's medical history while they wait for his mother. After the five first lines, Rick remembers why he sometimes regrets his speciality. He continues to read, and the discovery that they share the same first name mildly amuses him. Perhaps, he is familiar because he looks like a Richard. Whatever, it means to look like a Richard.

RJ' sigh interrupts Rick, and he looks up to the boy, who is tired of waiting. Rick is about to ask what is wrong when the door opens.

"Sorry, Judith was being difficult." A woman says, and Rick assumes that she is talking to his little patient.

On her arm, a pouting little girl with freshly dried tears hangs. She has not noticed him yet, and Rick does not feel like startling her. He waves to Judith (He presumes), and she pulls on the woman's leg.

"Baby," She sighs and turns to look at the toddler, who points at Rick, "Oh, so…rry" She stutters, but she quickly regains the upper hand.

She pushes her hair away from her face, and another impression of familiarity assaults Rick. However, he does not have time to dwell on it, and she is already speaking.

"I think we got the wrong office," She says with embarrassment coating her words, "I thought it was Doctor Maggie Rhee's office. I have been waiting in the wrong office." She rumbles, and Rick watches her do so with a surprising fondness.

The moment on itself feels like a Déjà vu, and Rick can't bring his mind to pinpoint what feels so familiar. She continues to speak, and Rick thinks that she will eventually run out of breath.

"Mrs Barnes?" Rick ultimately speaks, and she only nods. "Doctor Rhee had an emergency, and I am handling her patient." He tells Michonne, "Doctor Richard Grimes; I'm sorry for being late and very late." He extends her hand for her to greet, and he borrows RJ's words.

* * *

The colours have drained from Michonne, and she hesitantly takes his hand. She sees it in his eyes that Rick is attempting to place her face. Michonne does not know if she should feel relieved or disappointed. Her emotions are a mixture of both.

Rick holds her hand for too long, and Michonne stares at their joined hand. He knows the truth, and she begins interiorly to panic. She looks at her son and daughter. She returns her attention on Rick, and it is the same man. She has stared too long in her children's eyes, not to recognise where that particular feature comes from, and God, he knows the truth.

"Richard like me," RJ says, and Michonne's heart rate plummets.

"Ah," Rick answers with similar excitement, and Michonne looks at the duo with apprehension.

Rick has not let go of her hand, and Michonne does not know who will give it up first. RJ's features who looks like a miniature of this man, or Judith's big blue eyes that are exactly the same shade. Again, Carl's absence is a blessing.

From the triplets, Carl is the one who looks exactly like this man, who Michonne never anticipated to see again in her life. If she did not give birth to three replicas of Rick, she would have forgotten all about him, as he seems to have about her. Michonne did not even know his name until today.

"Oh sorry…" Rick's voice brings Michonne out of her stressful thoughts, "I forgot a second there." He returns Michonne's hand. "Again sorry for being late, but Doctor Rhee only informed me of the change a few minutes ago."

Michonne nods, and she reminds herself to breathe. She is not able to breathe around Rick. Michonne does not trust herself to speak around Rick. He has not recognised her. She flashes a smile to brush off his apology, and she knows her voice will quiver.

"So can you tell me what brings you to our hospital?" Rick tells Michonne, as he retrieves his professionalism.

The question serves to remind Michonne of the place and time. She draws a deep breath, and her concerned eyes fall on her son. She takes RJ's hand.

"The last weeks, my son has been tired. He is a lively kid, but now he barely plays. Next, he started to have random bruises, and I took him to his doctor." She takes a minute to breathe as she retells the events.

Everything happened so suddenly, and Rick's pen quietly continues to take notes. He quickly read RJ's medical report.

"Well, the diagnostic was leukaemia, and someone referred us to Doctor Rhee." Michonne's voice breaks, and she does her best not to cry.

Rick sits his pen, and his hand covers Michonne's one. He gives her a good minute to breathe and reorganise her thought. The scene is common for Rick, and as much as he hates it, he has lost his sensibility. Four years as a pediatric oncologist has made him witness many breakdowns.

"I'm fine," Michonne timidly says, and Rick's touch makes her uncomfortable.

He does not remember, but she does. Michonne subtly pulls her hand back, and she wipes her tears before they fall. She has never had such a stressful week.

"I'm okay." She repeats the sentence a few times to ground herself.

"I have a few questions," Rick says when Michonne begins to breathe again.

Rick asks many questions, which Michonne answers at the best of her ability. She gives her family history, and she adds about RJ's birth conditions.

"And so you are the biological mother of all three, and I'm sorry for the question," Rick says as his eyes travel between RJ and Judith.

Michonne already knows the following question. Her children are genetic oddities. They seem to have selected a gene and gone with it. Judith appears to be fully white and so does Carl, but RJ is the perfect mixture of his parents.

"They are fraternal triplets," Michonne says, and so Rick can't stop stuttering while he attempts to ask her the paternity of her children.

"And have they all undergone testing to see the risk?" Rick softly asks, and for a minute, Judith who has begun to crawl under his desk distracts him.

"Judith?" Michonne sighs, and she hesitates to go pick her daughter. "Come out of under the table."

The thought of kneeling between Rick's leg to grab her daughter crosses her mind, and Michonne has to remind herself of the place and moment.

"Mama…" RJ whines on her right, "It broke," he shows a little broken piece in his hand.

Between Judith crawling under Rick's desk and RJ breaking parts of medical devices, Michonne does not know what to do.

"I'm sorry…" She tells Rick while she takes the broken piece, which RJ hands to her, "I will pay for it." Michonne quickly adds with an apologetic look. "Judith?"

"It's okay…" Rick offers a reassuring smile, which brings forward a single night. "Don't worry about it, and the hospital has more than enough hammer."

"Hi, Judith?" Rick says as he leans to look at the little girl pulling at his pants, "Do you need anything?" He tenderly asks, and Judith shakes her head. "Do you want to come out of the table or I need to make space for you to explore?" Rick adds.

Michonne looks at Rick, and she can't help the emergence of a past memory. There is a reason why her life always takes a strange turn on Mondays. It almost feels like a twilight zone. Judith extends her arms for Rick to help her out of under his desk. He picks her up, and Michonne thinks that so close of Judith, Rick might see it.

"Okay, you're going to help me for a minute," Rick puts a pen in Judith's hand after carefully sitting her on his lap, and he gives her a white page. "Now, you're a little doctor."

"I will take her," Michonne rushes to say with embarrassment, "and Judith is…" RJ's teary voice interrupts her.

"Mama," He pulls on Michonne's pant, and when she looks at her son, He points to his sister, "I want to help…" The tears fill the rim of his eyelids.

Michonne scratches her head, and she does not know what made her believe it was a great idea to take two toddlers to a medical visit. However, she did not have a choice. Carl needed to go for his practice, and it meant no one to watch after Judith.

"I'm so sorry." She profusely apologizes, but Rick only answers with a smile.

"Here," He carefully gives his stethoscope to RJ, "Now, you're a little doctor too."

"I'm sorry," Michonne repeats.

"Don't be. This is part of my job, and these two have the mildest tantrums that I have seen." He reassures Michonne.

"You caught them on a good day," Michonne replies with easy comfort. "And so those questions?" She says to break the moment.

Rick continues with his lines of questioning about her children. Michonne gives any information, which she can remember, and she promises to ask their nanny for any extra information. The conversation is smooth until Rick asks a question, which ties Michonne's tongue.

"Do you have any knowledge of their paternal side medical history?" Rick finishes with a routine question.

Michonne blinks, and she thinks about what to say. She draws a deep breath. Judith continues to act as if Rick has given her the greatest task in the world, and she has never been so quiet in anyone's lap. RJ has been twisting the stethoscope in every direction.

"No," She opts for the simplest version of the truth.

"Can you possibly access it?" Rick asks without a malicious thought.

"No," Michonne replies, and ultimately Rick's eyes still on her, "He is not in our lives."

" Okay," Rick hesitates in his answer, and he quickly speaks to avoid a malaise, " Okay" He looks for better words, " I will have RJ run a series of test, and from there, we will determine a treatment plan."

Michonne listens to Rick speak, and she slightly tenses. She never expected to meet him again in a million years. She knows he does not remember her, and it is a little bruise to her ego. However, she understands why he would not. They did not meet in the most normal circumstances.

"Doctor Rhee…" Michonne halts, and she does not want to sound tactless, "She was recommended by a friend, and well, I thought…"

"Doctor Rhee specialises on neonate and infant," Rick replies with an understanding of what Michonne so gauchely wants to say, "but if it does not sit well with you that I handle the case, I could have a colleague take RJ's case."

"Oh god, I didn't mean it like that." Michonne says with slight embarrassment, "As long as you are the best at what you do in this hospital, I will want you to handle RJ's treatment. I just need the best doctor to take care of my baby." She says with sincerity.

Their past, which Rick fails to remember, is a non-factor in this situation. Michonne tells herself to get over her anxiety.

"Then I will open a spot for RJ." Rick answers, "Here," He passes to Michonne the test order. "I should see you in a week, and we can discuss the results."

"Thank you," Michonne nods, and she rises from the chair.

She is anxious to leave, and she carefully pries the stethoscope out of RJ's hand. Judith is a bit more reluctant to leave Rick's lap. Michonne prepares herself for a scene, but Rick handles it with the experience of dealing with cranky children every day.

"Say goodbye to doctor Grimes," Michonne tells her children.

Judith and RJ raise their hand to obey, and Rick returns the goodbye with a smile. He hates and loves his job. However, today, it feels odd. He has no opening for a new patient, but he has a natural affection for RJ. He did not lie to Michonne, and he is the best at what he does, which is why his list of patients is endless.

Rick takes challenging cases, and RJ's case appears to have a good prognostic. He could have passed it to anyone in the department, but Rick felt the need to handle it. He looks at Michonne, and he has a question on the tip of his tongue.

"Bye, doctor Grimes," Her voice sounds oddly familiar.

Rick considers his options, and it is a harmless question. Therefore, he calls for Michonne while she is on the verge to leave.

"It's going to sound weird, but have we already met?" Rick dares to ask.

Michonne halts, and she ponders on the answer. A second of hesitation has her believe that Rick made the connection.

"Euh..." She begins, and Rick can swear it is a deja vu, " euh.."

"No, but I have a very common face." Michonne prays to have a steady voice, and she holds her tongue not to expand on the matter.

"Hmmm, maybe it is that," Rick replies without commitment.

He does not think it is very ethical to tell Michonne that she is too gorgeous to have a common face. Rick knows that he has not met a woman as gorgeous as her, and the comparison includes his current girlfriend, Lori.

"Good Bye, doctor Grimes," RJ repeats, and his small voice drags Rick out of his thoughts.

"Bye RJ, and see you next week," Rick says, and he already begins to think about the hours to schedule him.

He would have to pull those hours for his nonexistent personal time. Rick can hear Lori's complaining about his schedule, but he feels compelled to help the little boy. The sense of friendliness, which he felt around the entire family, influences Rick. Rick's eyes drift on Michonne, and he can't stop thinking that he knows her. She gives him a smile as she walks out, and her smile jolts out his mind. Perhaps, he met her during that time. Rick quickly shakes his head. Why would a woman so gorgeous go to that length?

* * *

Michonne leaves Rick's office, and she has the need for an urgent conversation with her best friend. The chances for a mistake are minimal because she never knew his full name. Aside from his first name, which she always thought to be an alias, Michonne did not have a clue on him.

However, he looks the same aside from a few signs of age and maturity. He still looks as good as she remembers. It took her a few months to get rid of the crush, and she still has to find a better sex partner. That is partly because she has three children to take care of thanks to Richard Grimes.

Michonne has to talk to Sasha, and she has to tell her how she has met her children biological father. After all, it is Sasha's fault if she was in the position to procreate with him. She looks at her children, and Michonne did not miss how they were so comfortable with the man, who is biologically their father.

To make matter worse, they both take after him. To anyone who knows the truth, the resemblance is blatant. However, with Carl, that resemblance would be hard to miss even by a blind man. How does she always find herself in this odd situation? Sasha, she always has a hand into it.

Michonne groans with frustration, and she has to speak with her best friend. How is she going to deal with this situation? She looks at RJ who is sleeping in the back of the car. If it means the best paediatrics oncologist, the how does not really matter if it matters. Michonne will endure the odd situation. She should have killed Sasha six years ago.

* * *

_6 years ago _

"What?" Michonne stares at her friend, and she needs Sasha to repeat her sentence.

"It is a birthday present and a rupture present," Sasha calmly states, and her smile is bright.

Michonne shakes her head, and she does not know where to start. She has to correct too much in Sasha's statement. Therefore, she rolls her eyes. She does not know what is worst: Sasha's choice of a birthday present or the fact that she celebrates a fresh rupture between Michonne and her longtime boyfriend. When she says longtime boyfriend, she means logically it should at least be a fiancé. Anyway, Michonne refocused her mind away from that bitterness.

"You can't be serious," Michonne sighs.

She gives up on getting ready for her birthday party, and there is actually no party because Sasha has instead decided to go with such insanity. Michonne glares at Sasha, and she bought a designer dress for tonight.

"I bought a vintage Gaultier for tonight and Sasha…" Michonne stops to breathe before she expresses more of her frustration, "that shit cost a lot, and now I can't wear it."

Sasha looks at Michonne, and she makes a show to roll her eyes. She knew her best friend would be difficult.

"Your mother bought you that dress, and to her, it was chicken change. It was the same mother that partly financed this birthday present." Sasha says with soaring pride, and the affection for Michonne's mother coats each word.

"My mother helped you pay the fees of a prostitute," Michonne asks, but she already knows the answer.

Evelyn Barnes is an eccentric and wealthy woman who has too much time on her hand. She is very much the opposite of her stern no-nonsense daughter. Michonne would say that she takes after her dad, but he is as eccentric as his wife is. Therefore, any of her parents could have paid for this odd birthday gift.

"Yep, "Sasha replies, "When I told her about your orgasm problem, she wanted to help." She finishes the sentence with the uttermost seriousness.

"Williams?" Michonne cries the name with frustration.

Michonne stares at her oldest and only friend, and the fact that Sasha is her only friend is why she continues to breathe.

"Barnes," Sasha dispassionately says, "You can't be twenty-five and still wondering what a proper dick down feels. Twenty-five is a golden age, and you are going to get an orgasm tonight." She walks to Michonne's closet and drags out the Gaultier dress.

"I could be frigid, Williams." Michonne counters with the insecurity of her. "I don't get there with my vibrator too, and another silly present that you thought I needed." Her frustration grows.

Sasha remains unfazed, and she knows Mike must have given excuses for underperforming. She passes the dress to Michonne, and she moves to Michonne cupboard to search for lingerie.

"I know you didn't use it more than twice, and you have to know what you like to have a great experience." Sasha corrects Michonne, and she pulls a set of French lace underwear, "You, child, have had dry sex for too long, and so a vibrator was a bit ambitious. You could be a penetration girl, and I should have given you a dildo. And so I decided to go a stage lower, I am paying for your night with a fancy Gigolo."

Michonne listens to her friend, and she has in mind to suggest a psychiatric hospital. Sasha is beyond thoughts and prayers. She needs professional help and another hobby, which does not include using Michonne as a potential patient. Michonne sighs and she hates the perks of having a sex therapist for best friend. Michonne is more on the prudish side.

"A prostitute?" Michonne emphasises.

She does not pick the set of lingerie, which Sasha gives her. Michonne pulls her cupboard, and she begins to look through it. Sasha knowingly smiles, and Michonne always gives into her friend plan. Loyalty will be her best friend downfall.

"A Gigolo or an escort at best." Sasha corrects, "At the price one night cost, I will have you use the correct terminology. You are a freaking lawyer now, and you know how to use your words." She adds to annoy Michonne.

"Still waiting for my Barre result and I am already taking the risk on my future career by seeking a gigolo," Michonne says while she pulls a magenta set of handmade lingerie.

"That is the spirit," Sasha claps excitedly when she takes not of Michonne's choice of lingerie.

"I am going because you paid five thousand dollars for a pro…a gigolo. We don't waste money in this house. You could not pick a cheap one." Michonne laments.

She does not even know how Sasha found that agency, but she had seen federal courts more lenient with rules and regulations. Michonne would have asked for a refund, but it was not part of the policy. She considered sending Sasha to get the dick that she ordered, but only the person indicated as the client could. They even had her social security number.

"It is going to be worth it, Barnes." Sasha says as she pulls her phone out of her pocket, "Look at him. A whole snack." She almost shoves the picture into Michonne's eyes.

"He is alright, but he ain't all of that." Michonne looks at the man with his buzz cut.

Michonne likes pretty boys, and the man, who Sasha selected, is more in the side of dangerous attraction. Sasha picked a let me ruin your life and call me daddy while I do it. Michonne did not know how else to describe the man on the screen.

"Shane is fucking good looking, quit it." Sasha says with indignation, "I almost made this picture my saving screen. It is only because I have self-respect, and you're going to fuck that I didn't."

Michonne rolls her eyes, and she slides into her dress. She can't believe she is wasting her dress into this ludicrous Monday night. She bought the dress to turn head in the club, and Michonne checks her appearance in the mirror. She looks good, and the look is going to waste. She pulls her locks into a long ponytail on top of her head.

"Yeah, you should have saved him for you." Michonne deadpans, and she applies a layer of lipstick.

"Oh, you look so fuckable. You even thought of the ponytail. I am proud," Sasha hugs Michonne, "I swear he should be the one paying you. Turn around," She asks when she releases Michonne from the hug.

Michonne reluctantly turns around, and Sasha catcalls. The silk of the skirt perfectly flows on Michonne's curve, and the champagne gold colour of her dress flatters her skin.

"Okay, let's go before I change my mind," Michonne says, and she is already losing her nerves.

…

…

…

Michonne looks around the luxurious elevator, and she glances at Sasha who frowns. Her friend's expression suffices to raise her anxiety. She knew it was a bad idea. What happens if that Shane is a psychopath? He is going to assassinate her over an orgasm.

"What's going on?" Michonne asks when Sasha is silent for too long.

Sasha quickly types on her phone, and she pushes it down her pocket. Sasha looks up to Michonne, and she grins.

"Last minutes details," she breathes the words, and Michonne wants to know more. "A surprise," Sasha responds to Michonne's cocked eyebrow.

As if, she needs any more of this tonight. Michonne considers leaving the elevator. The place where she was supposed to meet the gigolo was on the top floor of the building, and they were quickly ascending no pun intended.

"Is it a potential murder?" Michonne sarcastically asks.

"Of your pussy and only your pussy," Sasha flashes perfectly aligned white teeth, and it was an easy one.

"Let's go home, "Michonne groans, "We can threaten to sue them over the refund."

She says hopeful, and the elevator stops. Sasha stands behind Michonne, and she pushes her friend out when the doors open.

"Stop being such a Michonne, and enjoy your present, Barnes," Sasha says, and Michonne feels like a reluctant child on the first day of school.

She runs toward the elevator, and the door has closed. Michonne presses on the button to call it back, and she patiently waits. After a few seconds, the elevator returns empty. Michonne slides inside, and she has no intention to go through with Sasha's insane plan. She presses the lobby, and the elevator does not move nor does it closes. Michonne looks around, and she apparently needs an access key.

Michonne suppresses a cry of frustration, and they had to be on the top floor. She is not going down thirty-five floor with 7 inches Ferragamo. Her life is precious, and walking straight in these shoes is an extreme sport. She has no choice but to knock at the only door aside from the elevator one. She will ask the access key, and she will leave. Michonne repeats the word a sufficient amount of time to be able to say it.

After a few minutes of pondering on the plan, she knocks at the door. It takes enough time for Michonne to begin to feel exasperated with the wait. She almost thinks about the stairs, but the door opens before she makes the decision.

Where she expects rough feature and harsh masculine line, Michonne finds the definition of a pretty boy. She does not know if she should feel relieved that Sasha dropped her at the wrong door or if she should feel disappointed because the Lord help her the man is a feast. Her mouth is dry, and she has caught him at the wrong time.

He finishes sliding his arm in his black shirt, and his pretty eyes fall on Michonne. Those eyes, Michonne knows that she should state her purpose for knocking at his door, but she has to stop looking at his eyes first. She must have thought the word a million of time, but he is pretty. Michonne draws a deep breath, and she can't add fainting on the list of embarrassment.

_Please take me?_ Michonne attempts to remember what she wanted to say. Something about some elevator and not willing to take staircase with Italian designer shoes worth a semester of a good education, Michonne strives to make sense of her thoughts.

"Euh…" Is she stuttering? Is she ogling him? She thinks that she has done both in a second of opening her mouth.

Michonne takes a slow breath. Can he close his shirt? Father in heaven, she is nervous. The floor needs to swallow her, and so she can't stop staring at the lean muscle of his abdomen.

_Say something, Michonne. _

"Euh…" something else, but not impregnate me "Hi," she blurted, and it is good enough by her current intellectual level.

"Hello," He replies with a soft huskiness to his voice

She should have asked him to be the father of her children so he could elaborate an answer. He leans on the doorframe, and his eyes take note of her. Michonne feels a shiver going down her spine.

"Come in, please" His voice is extremely sensual and smooth.

How can she objectively say no to what sound like verbal sex? Until anyone finds the answer, Michonne will do the wisest thing. He moves his arm away from the doorframe, and Michonne squeezes between the door and him. His perfume saturates the air when her nose grazes his chest.

"I' m Richard" He softly says as he slowly closes the door.

"Richard," Michonne repeats, and she attempts to retrieve her common sense.

_How do you do that with Rick? Rick? She can't help it_, and Michonne knows he must be Rick in an intimate setting.

"Shane couldn't honour your appointment, but you already know that." He continues to speak.

"I know…" She only echoes him.

Rick looks at Michonne, and he can see that she is nervous. He approaches her, and his hands sit on her shoulders. His thumbs delicately explore her collarbone.

"Relax," he softly tells her, and she can only nod. "A glass of wine," Rick asks, and she nods again.

He disappears for a second, and Michonne quickly pulls her phone out. As she expected, Sasha has left her a message.

"You deserve it," Michonne whispers the words, and she watches Rick return to the room.

_One night, her birthday, a pretty boy. She deserves it._ There is no refund, and everyone including her mother thinks she needs an orgasm to celebrate her twenty-five years old. _What can be the consequences?_


	2. Chapter 2

**I don't own the walking dead**

**Thanks for the review**

**Please, review**

* * *

**Chapter I:**

* * *

"You don't have to do it," Rick hardly recognises the neediness of his voice, "Tonight, it's all about you," He croaks between moans and heavy breaths.

Rick looks at her brown eyes, and she returns his look with a confused expression. Her dreadlocks spill on Rick's laps, and the nails of her left hand bore into the muscles of his right thigh. The little pain is a more potent aphrodisiac than Rick ever noticed.

"I am doing it wrong?" She inquires as she pulls Rick's dick out of her mouth, and he misses the softness of her plump lips.

Rick has never been so hard for anyone, and his brain is slowly processing her words. Her soft and sensual voice captivates Rick's mind, and she has an elegant ton, which might drive him crazy. Is she doing it wrong? Rick's answer is a glance at his engorged manhood. Her delicate fingers softly caress the sensitive manhood.

"Oh no, you are doing it too fucking right," He moans the words, and she appears unwilling to trust him.

"But you don't want me to do it?" She asks with a frown digging lines on her forehead.

Her voluptuous lips turn into a more enticing pout. Those big bright eyes bind him to the bed, and he cannot explain how wrong her insecurities are. His brain can't fathom the use of language. Rick leans, and he kisses in an almost aggressive manner. His hand fists the golden satin of her dress.

"No, I want you to do it." He whispers between kisses, "but I need you to stop because I don't get paid to be a minute man." He kisses her again.

"But," She hesitates, and her timidity is endearing.

Rick teasingly bites her lower lip. He has needed to do that since he saws her pearly white teeth chew on it. For a minute, she forgets what she wants to say. He kisses her common sense and language ability away. He likes the taste of him embedded under layers of her sweetness.

"But…" He teases with his tongue flirting with her mouth, and his hands begin a careful exploration of her body.

"I like…" She has a candid smile, and she sounds super shy.

Her white teeth return to her lower lips, and Rick angles his fingers under her chin. He tilts her head, and so she looks into his eyes when he presses his mouth to the corner of her mouth.

"You like?" His voice is lower than it was second ago, and it drips with needs.

She looks at him in the eyes, and her movements are slow and suave. Her lips burn a path of kiss on the curve of his neck, and when her teeth draw sinuous lines along his abdomen, Rick cannot help the shivers of his body.

"Sucking your dick," she punctuates that statement with a slow lick to the head of Rick's dick.

Her lust-filled eyes on him and the bourgeois undertone of her voice when she says something so nasty overwhelm Rick. Rick struggles with a curse word and an orgasm.

Think of an anatomy class. He tells himself, and she might have just find the male g spot. Rick throws his head back on the mattress, and he needs to focus on not coming, which he cannot do while he stares into her onyx eyes.

"Fuck," He cries when she takes him all in, and her wet and warm mouth will make him go mad. "Michonne," He moans, and she peers at him with the most sinful expression.

A slight confusion befalls on Rick's mind, and he responds to hands on his manhood. Now that he has put a name on her, he grasps how unapproachable she is. Her lips no longer feel the same, and he is not struggling to keep from coming. Michonne began to fade as soon as Rick said her name. Someone pulls his mind out of the moment. The hair on his legs is no longer as soft as her dreadlocks.

_What the fuck?_ Rick's eyes slowly open. Brown long tendrils lay on his thighs and abdomen. He groans with poorly hidden dissatisfaction with the sensation of her mouth on his dick. Rick looks at his crotch area, and he fails to remember where he is. The sleep disorientation persists for a few seconds, he looks around, and the walls are mint.

From the softness of the bed, Rick deduces that he is inside his bedroom. Not again, Rick sighs with defeat. He cannot comprehend what is wrong with him. Nothing in a literal manner is wrong with him, but after waking up from another fantasy with the same woman, Rick needs a form of assurance. If there were not so vivid, Rick would not have a problem with these wet dreams. Although he would ethically have a problem with it, Michonne is the mother of a patient.

_Now, she is Michonne and not Miss Barnes._ Rick does not fail to notice his familiar way of thinking about her. Rick has a poor memory when it concerns the names, but he has her name engraved in his memories. Rick has Michonne embedded in his mind. Rick's thoughts preoccupy him, and he fails to notice the mouth sucking on his dick.

…

…

…

"Rick?" Lori wails while she pulls her mouth away from Rick's dick.

He finally notices Lori, and Rick groans with disinterest. Rick looks at her between his legs. The caress of her tongue on his dick is wrong. This morning, Rick is not willing to pretend that he enjoys Lori's fellatio. He cannot fake a moan, and he fails to act as if he enjoys a set of teeth almost flaying the skin from his penis. Rick's past as a gigolo is long gone, and he no longer earns a copious amount of money for pretending in a bed.

_So a fantasy of you being a gigolo to…well, I don't control my dreams._ Rick consoles himself with reason. He knows that it is unfair to compare the fruit of his imagination with the effort of his girlfriend, but Michonne in his fantasy sucked his soul out of his dick. With guilt and his usual care, Rick fakes a moan while Lori's teeth threaten to scalp his manhood. Rick looks at the ceiling, and he should not do it. However, he wants to preserve and protect his penis.

Rick thinks about her nails sinking in his thighs, and he hears her voice in the back of his mind. Rick imagines Michonne's sensual moans with a precision, which slightly frightens him. His dreams were more vivid than he believed. His body reacts to memory more than it does to Lori's ministration.

A few more thoughts of Michonne's mouth going up and down his dick pushes Rick down the edges. Rick takes his manhood out of his fiancé's mouth, and he finishes before she can spoil his orgasm with another accidental bite.

"That was…" Rick does not know what to say, and he draws a deep breath.

He can barely look at Lori, and his body continues to recover from the hardest orgasm he had in the last months. Rick believes Lori can notice the difference and guilt.

"Good," Lori supplies with a smile, and she moves to straddle Rick's waist.

"Yeah…" Rick replies with a hint of awkwardness.

"You were moaning in your sleep. I thought I will turn your fantasy into reality." Lori continues, and Rick becomes livid.

She raises her arm to remove her tank top. Rick resists the impulse to ask what name he called, but Lori does not appear to be angry. He should not think of it, and his dream is a physiological response to a beautiful woman. He is a man with a functioning libido.

_Well, how functioning is that thang?_ Rick looks at his crotch, and he sighs with exasperation. He has endless excuses for his recent lack of sexual appetite. The exhaustion from the countless nightshift sounds plausible, and his body is sleep-deprived. Therefore, sex is not a priority.

_You're thinking about it_. Rick cannot deny the truth, and his dreams about Michonne are past the status of repressed thoughts. Admitting the truth only adds to Rick's frustrations.

"I have to head to work, and so if you can…" Rick cannot help his irritation, and he grabs the tank top, which Lori removed, "I mean if you can get off my dick." He presses the top to Lori's chest.

"What?" Lori confusedly asks, and she barely avoids falling as Rick rises to leave the bed.

Lori stares at him, and she wonders what caused his reaction. Is he still mad at her? She did not pick the right words last night, but how else could she react to her fiancé refusing to change his schedule to help plan a wedding this year.

"I have to go to work…" Rick grunts and he grabs his bath towel.

"No, what did you say, besides the usual, I have to go to work?" Lori clarifies.

Rick sighs, and he is not in the spirit for a dispute. Last night was rough, and for once, he told Lori some harsh truths. Until he finds a reason to put it in the second position, his job is Rick's priority. A wedding ceremony in the Bahamas is not a sufficient reason to take a leave of absence in Rick's book.

"Not now," Rick warns, and his irritation has a lot to do with having fantasies, which make his actual sexual life pales in comparison.

"When?" Lori refuses to regard Rick's warning, "Fucking when Rick?" She leaves the bed to join him, "When one of those stupid kids di…" She stops on time, but Rick's icy look reveals that he easily finished that sentence, "Rick?"

Lori calls after her fiancé when Rick's reaction is to walk away from her. Per se, Lori does not regret what she said, but she can't add more fuel to the flame threatening to turn their relationship into ashes. As the months of engagement began to turn in a year, the arguments have become more frequent between Lori and Rick.

"Not now," Rick closes the bathroom door, and it stands as a punctuation mark on his sentence.

* * *

Michonne takes the glass of mimosa, which Sasha passes to her. After the last hour of conversation, she needs to numb her mind. She does not know who the worst between her mother and her best friend is, and Michonne cannot decide who offers the worst advice.

"What in the porn scenario is happening?" Sasha speaks between sips of her brewage, "did he have the entire doctor outfit?" She adds a question to which Michonne fails to recognise the relevance.

"What is a doctor uniform?" Michonne challenges with slight confusion.

"Don't you watch Grey's anatomy?" Michonne's mother offers her unwarranted help, "You know that two-piece, which gives the doctor an amazing ass."

"Yes, he had a…" Michonne fails to finish her sentence because of her best friend.

"An amazing ass?" Sasha completes with uttermost seriousness.

Michonne rolls her eyes, and she wonders why she endures the long hours of torture to honour this tradition of having breakfast with her best friend and her mother every Wednesday.

"A scrub," Michonne deadpans.

"How is that relevant to this situation?" Sasha rolls her eyes, and she looks at her best friend with exasperation.

"How is his ass relevant to this fucking conversation?" Michonne retorts, and she drains her glass.

The conversation has yet to take a logical direction. For the last two days, she has talked about Rick Grimes. Now, she does not want to talk about his ass in a scrub.

"Language?" Evelyn chastises her daughter with her soft tone, and Michonne refrains from rolling her eyes at her mom, "If you want to rekindle old flames with him, some incentives must exist." She subtly explains the relevance of Rick's ass.

Sasha nods at the polished version of _if you want to smack that the peaches must be juicy_. Despite Sasha's silence, Michonne reads her best friend thoughts on her grin, and she shakes her head.

"Which flames are we talking about now? I doubt he still charges five thousand dollars for a night." Michonne sarcastically replies.

"I mean you could afford him monthly on your salary only, and God knows it will do you a great service to get some activities regularly. It is been a journey in the desert this last two years." Evelyn speaks with nonchalance.

After her years of a poor sex life with Mike, Michonne no longer wants to waste her time. She has had good sex through the years, but nothing was worth the commitment. She has three priorities, and the men in her dating life did not blend well with her children. The triplets have been territorial, to say the least. They hated every of Michonne's boyfriend, and they are not fond of her new suitor.

"Amen to that," Sasha raises her mimosa glass, "He did give it to you right that night," she adds with an encouraging tone.

"Do any of you have missed those three children, who are the result of that good sex?" Michonne counters.

"Use a condom this time," Sasha casually replies, and Michonne glares at her friend.

"How many times do I have to say it? The man is a doctor. Do you think he was having unprotected sex as a prostitute?" Michonne indignantly argues.

Sasha shrugs as a response, and they had this conversation a thousand times. Michonne refills her glass, and she senses a growing headache.

"Gigolo," Evelyn corrects Michonne.

This time, Michonne cannot help her reaction. She rolls her eyes at her mother, and Evelyn immediately taps the back of Michonne's head.

"Sorry," Michonne mumbles, and Evelyn nods.

"We used condoms," She repeats, and Michonne has endlessly mentioned that odd part during five years.

"Through every round," Evelyn sceptically inquires.

"You're my mother," Michonne sighs, and she should not have this conversation around her mother.

"Which makes me aware of how one gets pregnant," Evelyn deadpans.

Michonne stops the escape of a cry of frustration. Her eyes travel between Sasha and Evelyn.

"Fifteen per cent chance of pregnancy," She states with growing irritation.

"Sources?" Sasha counters and she pointedly looks at Michonne "Your baby daddy?" Sasha winks.

"Google it, Williams?" Michonne replies, and she passes her phone to Sasha, "Do I have to remind you of the traumatic way in which I learned that I was pregnant with Richard's children?" She adds with blatant discomfort.

Michonne's words command silence. Everyone finds refuges in a sip of mimosa, and no one wants to remember the chaos. The silence spreads, and Michonne regrets saying those words.

"Anyways, can we seriously talk about this?" Michonne bravely breaks the silence.

"Tell him the truth," Evelyn responds without an ounce of doubt. She does not see why Michonne should keep it a secret. For the two first years of the triplets, they endeavour to find Rick. With a name that could have been an alias, they did not have sufficient information to locate him.

"Mom," Michonne sighs, and she wishes it were as simple as it sounds from her mother mouth, "I can't immediately tell him." Michonne attempts to explain her situation, "look, I googled him."

"I did too, and you won't guess who I found…" Sasha interrupts Michonne, and it is out of concern.

Some aspects of Michonne's search for her children's father are hard to explore for Michonne.

"Williams, it's okay," Michonne says as she squeezes her best friend hands.

"You aren't going to tell him," Sasha knowingly pursues where Michonne stopped, "I'm going to support you for a short period, and then you're going to tell him." She announces with a meaningful glance at Michonne, "and preferably before you begin to have sex with him."

Michonne does not bother arguing Sasha's last comment. She has no intention to cross that line with Richard Grimes. Michonne does not need any complications. Even if she wanted, Michonne can't forget how meaningless she was in Rick's life.

"When the timing is perfect, I'm going to tell him." She determinedly states, "I can't take the risk to have this mess threaten RJ's treatment." She adds as an explanation about her reluctance to speak to Rick, "He's one of the best oncologists in the country, and I can't have him think that I want to fool him." She speaks out of the experience.

"With the way they all favour him, he will be stupid to doubt you," Evelyn points out.

Sasha nods in agreement with Evelyn. Aside from RJ, Michonne's children disregarded her genes.

"I don't think that is going to be the problem," Michonne replies with conviction that Rick won't challenge her words.

"His life is together." Michonne begins to explain why Rick might be furious," I love my children," She draws a deep breath, and Michonne does not like to look at her situation with those eyes, "but without your help and a babysitter always ready to come to watch them, I would have many regrets. They are three, and it demands sacrifice."

Michonne drains her glass, and her throat remains dry. She does not want to think about her reality. However, she has to face the harshness of it.

"We have faith, but RJ has cancer," She quietly states, and she wipes the tears threatening to fall, "My baby has that shit, which is eating him from inside." She stops to draw a breath.

"I would put anyone in my shoes." Michonne finishes speaking.

The pain and the anxiety, she would not put her worst enemy in her shoes.

"I can't walk to that man and tell him the truth. What do I tell him? Do you have an answer? Do you know how to do it without taking the risk to have him hate me and my children as a result?" Michonne ultimately stops trying to hold her tears.

In the last two days, those thoughts have haunted her. She has worked on different scenarios, and they all make her feel like a cruel monster.

"Hi, I know that you don't remember every woman who you fucked. I felt a special connection with you, and it does not matter much now. What matters is that you have three children who you don't know. Does it sound good?" Michonne's eyes travel between her mother and Sasha.

"I'm sure you will fall in love with them. They are amazing children. Carl is well behaved and loves comic. Judith is a bit of work, but she wants to fit with the boys. And RJ is a bit of you and me. Richard and Jean, my middle name, He has just enough of us. You are going to love all of them, but RJ, he might die." Michonne pursues, and she is too upset to care about her melting makeup.

"How am I going to tell him that?" She expects an answer from her mother or Sasha, "There is the ethical aspect, and as a father, he can't help RJ get better." Michonne points out that telling Rick would only add to the list of obstacles to RJ's recovery, "I will tell him, but it can wait a few more months."

Evelyn looks at her daughter, and she understands Michonne. However, she does not support her reason. With no fear to be brutal with her honesty, she speaks.

"Well, god forbid we lose our little angel, but do you want to tell him if?" Evelyn cannot say the words.

Despite the unfinished sentence, Michonne understands what her mother implies.

" You know he is actually good at his job," Michonne defensively replies, and she no longer feels comfortable enough to pursue the conversation," and I have to go to work." She stands before anyone can comment, and she frustratedly walks away from her best friend and her mother.

"You know that she tried to find him and well…" Sasha reminds Evelyn how badly Michonne took her last failures, and there are too much to consider.

"I know," Evelyn admits that for years, her daughter dedicated an excessive amount of time in a chance to find Rick. Unfortunately, some of the experience also closed her to the hope to locate Rick. Now in such a difficult time, she does not need the fear to have him reject her children.

* * *

Rick wonders why he decided to tell Shane every detail about his wet dreams. Sleep deprivation is the only reasonable answer. Rick drains his water bottle, and Shane continues to explain his theory.

"You fucked her," Shane states with unwavering conviction.

Rick chokes on his water, and he glares at Shane. He looks around the break room, and no one is alert enough to care about Shane shouting his theory.

"I would remember if I did," Rick argues, and he does not see how he could forget a woman that gorgeous. How could he erase a complete sexual experience? "You have not seen her," Rick adds as a deterrent for Shane's counter-argument.

Rick can only explain his situation with odd sexual frustration. He is not having the best sex life with Lori recently, and he is for lack of better words thirsty and horny.

"Your dream is too detailed to be a fantasy," Shane speaks from professional experience, "You fucked her." He repeats with a flippant certainty on what he says.

Any other days, Rick would not argue with a neurosurgeon about brain functions, but he would have to question his mental health if he agreed.

"You are talking out of your ass," Rick argues, and he has worked the scenario in his head. How can he forget the best sex of his life? It sounds pitiable that as a retired gigolo, he had his best sexual experience in the safety of his mind. "If I had sex with her and that kind of sex, I am an idiot for forgetting it."

Shane pointedly stares at Rick, and Rick hits his arm. Shane laughs, and he sinks his teeth in a sandwich, which tastes like hours of work and medical misery. He passes it to Rick, who has no hesitation finishing the soft bread and dead vegetable.

"What's her name?" Shane asks with his usual curiosity, and he pulls out his phone.

"I'm not giving you her name." Rick sighs, and he knows Shane wants to start an endless session of spying on Michonne.

Shane disappointedly returns his phone to his coat pocket. He checks his watch, and the break is about to end.

"You had sex with more than a hundred women. It was never twice the same woman, and so it does not matter how pretty she is. Your mind has filtered the memory. If she was as good as your memories of her suggested, you suppressed it for your sake. You would not have called back a client, and so you quickly erased the memory." Shane explains, and Rick has a hard time disregarding the argument.

"I would remember," Rick stubbornly repeats.

However, he must admit that he remembers nothing from his gigolo past. Endless visage of women and a lot of bad sex, above all, he was still a resident at the time, and it meant crawling under many patients and classes.

"Then the second option is to get a prenup because your dick wants out of your couple life," Shane announces, and Rick sighs with exhaustion.

He does not know why Shane insists on the matter, and Rick has become tired of defending Lori. His fiancé is not an opportunist, and Rick does not know why Shane pressures him into drawing a prenuptial contract.

"You aren't going to stop with that," Rick knowingly asks, and he massages his head as he expects a new headache.

"If you want to marry a gold digger, I can only ask that you get a prenup," Shane repeats for the umpteenth time.

Shane cannot explain how blind Rick is to his fiancé's greed. Perhaps, he does not care that Lori spends his hard-earned money on an available dick. Shane does not have the necessary proof for his accusation, but he has fucked enough women like her to recognise the signs. However, Rick must be naive to miss the sign.

"I don't need one..." Rick begins to speak, but Shane quickly interrupts him.

"You're fucking another woman in your dreams," Shane throws at Rick the fact, and Rick has no counter-arguments, "You need a prenup."

"Get a prenup," Maggie joins the conversation to support Shane.

Rick draws a deep breath, and he hates it when his best friends begin their anti-Lori campaign. He knows that their relationship has some controversial events, but she is not the woman whom they make her out to be. She is not a greedy bitch eager to latch on the first successful man. Despite her lack of understanding for his job and the requirements, they have not had to deal with as much crap as his friend believes they do.

"Maggie…" Rick pushes a sandwich toward his friend, "You owe me one for tricking me into taking the leukaemia case," He adds without any bite to his words.

"You wouldn't have taken a look at the case if I did not do that," Maggie replies, and she grins. "Beth babysits the boy, and she asked me to help. I met the mother, and she is a sweetheart. I had to help, and it meant helping them to have at least an appointment with the best." She continues with a proud expression, "and I heard that you agreed to handle his treatment."

Rick checks his watch, and he has no time left. He rises to return to his ward.

"I would not have taken the case even after looking at it, and it does not look like he will need anything beyond chemo. I don't work on those cases," Rick states with the cockiness of a man used to achieve divine deeds.

"But you are going to make an exception for him," Maggie replies without doubting Rick's big heart.

"His dick is leading him," Shane laughs, "He is thirsty for the mom," he adds with a wink at Rick.

Maggie looks at Rick for confirmation, and a small blush is enough of an answer.

"She is beautiful, but our dear Richard loves his license. He would not dare abuse of his power like that," Maggie warns for the sake of it, but Rick is not one to forget ethics.

"I would not bet on that when Richard is reckless and horny. You make sure to transfer her son to another competent doctor before you begin to move on her," Shane offers a piece of advice. He has a better understanding of his childhood friend than Maggie has. When Rick wants something, his wild side subjugates his reason and ethics. From those fantasies, Shane can help but notice that it is yearnings, which have begun to resurface.

"Well, Richard has a night shift, and he also has a fiancé, who he loves. Richard is not going to fuck the mother of his patient. Now, if any of you begins a betting pool, Richard is going to see HR," Rick's eyes swing between Shane and Maggie.

His best friends remain unfazed by his threats.

"Your husband covers my three next nightshifts and a thousand dollar, they are going to fuck," Shane does not wait for Rick to leave.

"I will talk to Glenn, but I have faith in Rick," Maggie replies, and Rick sighs.

"You are the worst, and again I have a fiancé," Laughs answer his statement.

"Monday, I can get a friend to work on your prenup," Shane returns to the previous topic.

"I'm not getting rid of you unless I do it, and so go ahead." Rick gives in, and he is too exhausted to continue arguing on the topic.

" You will thank me soon enough," Shane gloats, and Rick flips his middle finger at his best friend," I love you too."

"Yeah, do you want my nightshift?" Rick asks as he leaves the room.

"I hate children and adults too actually," Shane replies, and Rick rolls his eyes.

* * *

Michonne kisses RJ's forehead, and she is not willing to leave him. Clad in her designer dress, she has no choice but to attend that gala. She carefully places him in his bed, and she only calms down when he offers her a smile.

"Nothing is painful," Michonne tenderly asks, and she does her best not to stare at the bruise on his arm.

RJ shakes his head as an answer. Michonne inhales, and she pulls the book on his bedside. Michonne stares at the book, and she wonders why RJ likes those stories.

"Mama?" RJ's voice tugs on Michonne's attention.

She puts the book down, and she smiles at her son. RJ suddenly has a moment of shyness, and Michonne knows to expect a difficult question.

"Where is my dad, mama?" He asks with a deep frown.

Michonne takes a minute to process the question. She blinks for a minute, and she cannot offer an answer. What brought out that question? RJ appears to understand what Michonne thinks.

"Doctor Richard asked," RJ explains, and Michonne' lungs constrict.

She hears the excitement in her son's voice when he mentions Rick. Michonne's heart stops, and she has not said a word since RJ asks.

"Where is my dad? I will tell Doctor Richard next time," RJ continues to ask with a growing curiosity, and those brown eyes, which fortunately are a copy of hers, stare at Michonne.

Two days later and Michonne hates the absorbing memory of children. Michonne's hands begin to pick on the silk of her dress, and she looks at her clothes.

Why? She fails to answer the question. A chance meeting has started to have a snowball effect. She looks at the dress, which she chose to wear after so many years. Subconsciously, Michonne has made space for Rick Grimes in her brain. She is wearing the same dress, which she wore when they met for the first time.

"Where is my dad?" RJ begins to become impatient.

A tantrum is not far, and the little boy's voice trembles. His eyes shine with unshed tears, and Michonne has the same problem. She undoes her bun, and she passes her hand in her locks. Michonne did not expect to have this conversation two days after meeting the so-called father of her children.

"I don't know," Michonne hesitates.

RJ's piercing eyes stay for eternity on her, and he eventually gives in to the anguish. He places his hands over his eyes, and Michonne cannot ignore the small bruise all over his skin.

"You don't know," He begins to cry, and Michonne cannot fathom her son's reaction.

Before tonight, he never bothered to ask the question. Only Carl showed slight curiosity on the matter, but it disappeared as quickly as it came. Michonne gathers RJ in her arms, and she sits him on her laps. She presses multiple kisses all over him.

"RJ, baby, you don't have to cry about it." Michonne softly says after kissing the crown of RJ's head.

RJ raises his head to look at Michonne, and between the tears, he has a small pout.

"Do you want to tell me?" Michonne cajoles her son.

"Doctor Richard," RJ hesitates, and Michonne's heart threatens to leap out of his prison of bones.

"Doctor Richard," Michonne encourages RJ to continue.

RJ straightens, and he wipes the tears, which continues to fall. He tightly holds on his mother, and RJ searches for the right word.

"I wanted to tell him, and so he won't be sad not to know." RJ seriously says, and Michonne stares at her sweet boy, who thinks that Rick absolute needs the answer to that question. "But you don't know," He adds with the biggest sigh of disappointment.

Michonne draws a deep breath, and she deals with a random crisis like this every day. She wipes RJ's tears, and she begins to soothe him.

"Well," She struggles to find the words, and Michonne has to deal with the fact that her son has affection for his estranged father. "Doctor Richard is nice." Michonne tentatively says, and RJ eagerly agrees, "Which means that he will understand that you don't know. You can't always know about everything." Michonne softly explains.

RJ sceptically looks at his mother, and he wipes his remaining tears. He rests his head on his mother chest, and Michonne brushes his hair.

"But you know everything, mama," RJ argues, and his mama is amazing.

Michonne laughs, and she wishes that he were right. Her son would not have to ask where his dad was. During all the years when she looked for this man, and now fate was mocking her. She kisses his cheeks until RJ begins to laugh.

"I wish I knew everything, but it would not be fun," Michonne replies, and she hugs her son, "you don't want a boring mama," She asks with a gorgeous, which RJ returns.

"Doctor Richard knows everything," RJ announces, and Michonne has to accept that the impossible has happened.

Her most timid son has found an adult who he admires.

"Maybe," Michonne tenderly replies," and you like Doctor Richard," She asks while she already suspects the answer.

"He let me explo..." RJ's eyes widen, and he remembers what his mother told him not to do the last time.

"Ah, you explored his office, and you liked it." Michonne finishes.

"Sorry, mama..." RJ grins, and Michonne cannot lecture him about his actions.

"Okay, but now I need you to sleep." Michonne takes back the book, and she refuses to dwell on anything concerning Rick Grimes. "Where did we stop?" She asks, and RJ promptly answers.

* * *

Judith is always the hardest to put to bed, but today, Carl is throwing a tantrum. Michonne believes that her children are throwing those tantrums to keep her home. With Carl on her hip, she ultimately convinces Judith to settle for the little mermaid tonight, but Judith also said that she wanted to play at being a doctor.

The only one who has yet to mention Rick is Carl, and Michonne assumes it only is because he has not met the infamous Rick Grimes. Judith eventually gives in to her exhaustion, and she falls asleep halfway through the fairytale. Michonne turns her focus on her remaining son.

"Carl?" She sighs, and Carl is yawning, "you don't want to go to your bed?" Michonne attempts again to convince her son.

Carl does his best to stifle a yawn, and he is unsuccessful. Michonne laughs, and Carl frowns with a pout. Now, it is impossible to look at Carl without thinking about his older shadow.

"Can I come with you, mama?" He politely asks, and his big blue eyes are pleading.

"I can't take you with me tonight," Michonne knows Carl and his habits to pull a tantrum right before one of her date. The poor man is waiting down for her, and Michonne is not eager to entertain him. However, she needed a companion to keep some of the men at the gala away from her.

"But I want to see Doctor Richard," Carl's voice announces tears.

Michonne draws a deep breath, and she does not know what is going on with her children.

_What is so special with Doctor Richard? He is their father. They won't let me forget._ Michonne begrudgingly thinks, and her children are acting as if Rick is a new shiny toy. Michonne does not know if her sanity will survive this unplanned propaganda over Richard Grimes.

"Well, I am not going to meet Doctor Richard. I'm going to work, tonight." Michonne explains to her son.

Carl looks at his mother, and he is suspicious. She looks super pretty.

"You have a pretty dress, mama." Carl points out, and he waits for his mother to explain why she has a beautiful dress.

"It is a gala," Michonne explains, and Carl pouts to show his confusion. "The boring parties that you don't like," She expands.

"Eww," Carl replies, and he ultimately allows himself to yawn.

"Now, do you want to sleep?" Michonne knowingly asks, and Carl nods.

"Mama, I want to sleep with RJ," Carl asks between yawns, and Michonne does her best to keep a smile on her lips.

If he thinks one of his siblings needs comfort, Carl always sleeps in the same bed. It occurs to Michonne that her children have begun to notice that RJ is sick. She draws a deep breath, and Michonne never thought she would have to deal with such a situation.

"He will love to have his big brother," Michonne agrees.

He might only be a few minutes older, but Carl takes his older brother part seriously. Michonne carries him in RJ's room, and Carl carefully lies by RJ. He delicately encloses RJ in a cocoon of love. Michonne kisses her sons forehead, and she does not want to leave her children for a boring work gala.

…

..

…

"Sorry, triplets and sleep time do not mix well" Michonne apologizes with a meek smile.

"Three children, I could not tell." Michonne notices the tone in his voice.

Through the years, she has become familiar with that tone. The night is going to be long-drawn. Why did she accept his invitation? _Because of dick_. Michonne regretfully admits that she hoped to have sex, but he lost his chance with that remark. Above all, Carl already gave him that judgmental look.

"Give me a minute Spencer and I have to talk to my babysitter," Michonne states while she begins to head in the kitchen.

"Are we going ever to leave your apartment?" Spencer asks with irony, which sounds more like a complaint.

Michonne bites her tongue, _and Sasha wonders why her pussy is drier than the Gobi desert. Waste man everywhere_. She thinks while she walks away, and she can hear her children voices going on about the only man, who they unanimously admire after an hour of interaction.

_He does not remember you_. Those words suffice to knock some sense in Michonne.

"Beth?" Michonne calls for the younger woman, and she comes out of the kitchen.

"I know if anything happens, I have to take him to the emergency and call you immediately. It does not matter if he is only coughing or feeling a bit tired," Beth repeats what Michonne told her a dozen times.

"Thank you," Michonne hugs Beth, and she leaves her home with a heavy heart.

* * *

Michonne runs through the hospital corridors, and she cannot breathe. She cannot see where she is going because of the curtains of tears falling on her eyes. She does not remember what Beth said, but she heard the word emergency. Something about fever, Michonne did not wait for further explanation, and she left behind the gala and her date.

Now, Michonne races through the empty hospital corridors, and her eyes endeavour to locate her son. The miracle is that she has not twisted her ankles while running with her six inches heels. She does not care for the pain burning her feet, and she only needs to find RJ.

After running to a point where she cannot breathe, she catches a glimpse at the word emergency. Michonne stops in front of the emergency department, and she begins to look for Beth. Her desperation makes her miss the young blonde. Michonne frantically looks for her children and their babysitter.

"Michonne," Michonne hears her name, and she turns to uncover the source of the voice.

Beth approaches her, and she appears to be as anxious as Michonne. Michonne hugs her children's babysitter. Through her growing anxiety, she can barely find her words. She repeatedly fails to inquire about RJ. Michonne draws a deep breath until she regains her ability to speak.

"Where is he?" Michonne eventually succeeds to ask, " What is wrong?" She adds another question, " Where is Rj?" She asks with growing panic as Beth remains silent.

"RJ is waiting for his mother in the last bed," Michonne looks up to the voice, and Rick stands in front of her with a reassuring smile. "He is fine, but..." Rick does not finish his sentence, and his hand is arms full of Michonne.

Her dreadlock spreads on his shoulders, and the curves of her body feel familiar. Rick stiffens for a second, and he prays that his body does not give in to his primal instincts.

"Thank you," Michonne's breath caresses Rick's neck, and her arms tightly close around his shoulders.

"He is fine," Rick repeats until he notices that Michonne is capable to breathe.

He does his best not to return her hug, _but fuck she feels good, and you want to keep that license_. He resonates with his more eager desires. With how tightly Michonne hugs him, Rick cannot help the direction of his thoughts.

"Miss Barnes?" Rick eventually speaks, and he attempts to point out subtly that he needs his body back.

"I'm sorry," Michonne says after a long minute in Rick's arm, and she apologetically looks at him.

" No problem, I understand," Rick replies between yawns, which he fails to stifle.

" He is okay?" Michonne asks one more time to quiet her mind.

"He had a little fever, and it is under control now," Rick explains, and he continues to speak when he notices that Michonne follows every word " We will keep him for observation and a few series of tests," Rick finishes, " but overall, he is fine." He encouragingly smiles at Michonne.

" Thank you," Michonne reiterates, and she resists the temptation to hug him again.

She felt so safe in his arm, and he still wears the same perfume. Michonne does not want to revisit that past, but her mind latches on distraction.

" No need to thank me, but your babysitter deserves all the glory," Rick says with a humble smile, and he looks at the room where RJ is sitting, " I will take you to him, and so he can have his mama while he goes through the blood test. I think he is tired of my company, or I need to find another stethoscope." Rick tells Michonne to fill the silence.

She ultimately smiles at Rick, and he has to keep his mind on a leash. Michonne's arm grazes his arm while they quietly walk side to side. He does not give in to the temptation to stare at Michonne.

"He is back to sleeping," Rick says when they make it to RJ's temporary room.

"I thought the worst had happened," Michonne whispers while she leans against the framework of the door, "I can't lose him." She continues to speak to quiet her nerves. "We can't lose him." She looks at him in the way that makes Rick want to promise that they are not losing RJ, and his attachment to the patient goes beyond his duty to save lives. He senses that we include him, and Rick simply finds that he would crush him to lose RJ.

Rick places his hand on Michonne's back, and she leans in his less professional touch. They both stare at RJ's sleeping frame, and they share the same peace.

"If I have my ways, RJ will be well very soon," Rick tells Michonne, and his hand draws circles in her back.

"You promise," Michonne asks in a way, which she borrows from her children.

"I promise to give it my best," Rick replies, and Michonne feels immediately assured that it will go well.

"I heard your best is worth a lot," Michonne replies.

Rick chastises himself for thinking about flirtation, and he almost remembers saying those words in a different contest. He immediately pulls his hand away from her back. She straightens her back.

" I will go ask for his transfer to my ward," Rick speaks after a long silence, and a series of random thoughts of Michonne spread under him.

"Thank you, and I will watch him sleep," Michonne tells Rick, and she enters the emergency room.

Rick watches her walk, and his eyes travel the frame of her body. He notices the dress, and images of his hands prying the silk away from her skin invade his thoughts. She is wearing the same dress, and Rick remembers losing his breath as soon as the door opened on Michonne.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck _

"Miss Barnes?" Rick does not know what pushes him to call her.

"Michonne," She replies softly, and her eyes on him halt his heart.

"Yeah..." The moment is inappropriate, but the question is on the type of his tongue. "Michonne, did we?" Rick does not have the opportunity to finish his question.

"I got worried that you just left in the middle of our date," The voice comes from behind Rick, and Spencer passes Rick.

"I'm going to get a room for RJ, Miss Barnes," Rick says while he watches Spencer places his hand on Michonne's hips.

_Snap out of it before you lose your job. Did we have sex before? You want her to sue you_. Rick chastises himself for his impulsivity.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for the reviews**

**I don't own the walking dead**

**please review**

* * *

**Chapter II**

* * *

_Focus _

Michonne closes her eyes, and she needs to focus on the man talking instead of the one who has entered her son's room. However, she cannot help it. Rick has shed his white coat, and in six years, he has found the way to look better. Michonne's passes her tongue on her lips, and she is aware that she might send the wrong signal to Spencer.

She looks as if she is seconds away to pounce on her prey, and Michonne sighs. She attempts again to listen to what Spencer wants to say. Reluctantly, she drags her eyes away from the door of RJ's room, and it has never been so difficult to stop staring at an ass. Michonne draws a deep breath, and she cannot help where her thoughts expand.

_Mama is going to pay. I won't be in the street for one night. I won't feel it. _ She begins another thread of distracting thought, and Michonne's mind is desperate enough to build extravagant scenarios. For the fifth times, Michonne has to shove away a fantasy. Rick Grimes is no longer a gigolo.

"Michonne," She hears Spencer call her name in the background, " Michonne," He insists because she stands frozen with a faraway expression.

"Michonne," Spencer puts his hand on Michonne's shoulder, and the contact suffices to jolt her.

" What?" She sounds abrasive and frustrated.

Michonne does feel frustrated, and she does not believe it will get better. She had a plan for tonight, and it was very simple. _Dick, penis, cock, and bye_. She sighs at her desperation, and Sasha is right that she needs to unwire. She looks at Spencer, and he is the perfect candidate. Everything is very superficial and carnal, and Michonne would not have to worry about developing any feelings. She finds him boring, basic, and _did I say bland, so bland that chicken breast has flavour and personality. _

However, her plan has changed. Worse, her needs have shifted. She still wants to have sex. Unfortunately, she is developing a very specific need. Michonne's eyes return to the door of RJ's room, and she sighs. She shakes her head to get rid of such yearnings and thoughts.

_Don't even go there. Not even for masturbation purpose. We have been down this road. Consequences Mimi, just get the available dick and move on the next day. _Michonne attempts to convince herself. However, she is stubborn. Most of the time, she goes against common sense. Rick feels like forbidden fruit, and Michonne's mind is one of a rebel.

" Look," She focuses on Spencer, " This is not the place for any conversation." Michonne looks around the hospital's corridor. " you should go, and I don't know…" she sighs, and she wants to scream because she cannot stick to a simple plan.

Spencer quizzically stares at Michonne. He has his reservations, but he is not going to meet such a gorgeous woman at every street corner. Three kids are terrible disadvantages, and he does not want to play the stepdad role. However, he is willing to pretend and fake the interest. The reason why he followed Michonne speaks for itself. He believes her to be a naïve and desperate woman.

" I understand, and I only came to support you. RG is a good child, and I'm" He cups Michonne's face, and he does not give her a second to recover from his touch or the fact that he failed to remember her son's name.

Spencer presses his lips on Michonne's one. _Teeth, _Michonne immediately notices that he puts too many teeth. _Stop comparing_, she has to tell herself, but her heart is drawing the cruel comparison. Michonne's eyes are open, and she immediately regrets keeping them that way.

_Close your eyes_, She thinks it hard, but she fails to do it. Escaping Rick Grimes' captivating look is impossible. She does not know what to do when Rick leans on the door, and he looks in the depth of her eyes. She forgets that Spencer is doing the most trying to entice anything with his kiss full of teeth. However, Rick's hard stare hypnotizes Michonne.

….

…

…

_Oh great…_ Rick bitterly thinks, and his facial expression is a vibrant canvas of his mood. His eyes narrow on Michonne, and he does not know why he submits himself to the torture. He cannot help but think that he should be the one kissing her.

His mind pushes forward pictures and vivid memories of the richness of her sweet taste. Rick subtly draws a breath, and he does not break eye contact. Michonne does not appear to be able to avert her eyes. For a few seconds, they remain in the magnetism of their eyes. Eventually, the impropriety of his thoughts prompts Rick to get a grip of the situation.

" Sorry to interrupt," Rick clears his throat, and he does not take his eyes of Michonne, " RJ is calling for his mama." He adds when Michonne subtly shoves Spencer of her.

Michonne moves away from Spencer, and she begins to walk toward Rick. She ultimately lowers her eyes because she has no intention to find the meaning of his stare. Rick continues to stare at Michonne until she fills his sight.

"Is he okay?" Michonne asks with a slight panic, and once again Spencer is an afterthought.

Rick places his hands on Michonne's shoulders, and his thumbs rhythmically brush her collarbone. She looks at him with slight confusion and anxiety. However, Rick's touch is as soothing as it had been that night.

"He is fine and having a tantrum beyond my jurisdiction," Rick replies with a reassuring smile, and there is another emotion. " He wants his mom."

Rick's hands stand a minute too long on Michonne's shoulders. For as much as he tells himself not to blur the lines, Rick is true to his nature. He is allowing impulses to undermine his reason. He slowly removes his hands from Michonne's shoulders.

Rick slightly moves to allow Michonne inside the room. Their arms brush each other, and he feels a jolt of electricity travel every inch of his skin. The sensation is once again familiar. He has very little space for doubts. He might have slept with Michonne, but Rick cannot fathom that he forgot. Why would he push her in the back of his mind if a simple touch makes him feel so warm? Why would he forget?

* * *

Rick shakes his head, and he wants to believe that his sex drive is acting up. He stares at Spencer while Michonne disappears in the room. The man begins to head toward Rick, and Spencer has all the intention to follow Michonne.

" Family only," Rick smugly announces, and his smirk stretches his lips, " You can very well wait outside or go home," Rick adds with a poorly hidden resentment.

_Why are you acting jealous?_ He fails to answer. However, Rick knows that he does not like that Spencer. He stands in the way, which blocks the door. Rick knows a fuckboy when he meets one, and hanging around Shane is an extensive experience. Spencer fills every box on the application _of fuckboy association of waste your time. _

" It is not that serious," Spencer replies, and he looks at Rick with a small smile, " I don't want to be stepfather to your three kids," He adds with a small chuckle. Everything screams frat boy, and Rick fails to understand why Michonne would seek such a poor company, " She is hot, I'm going to tap that, but three kids and I understand why you didn't stick around to play dad." He winks, and he has the delusion that the bro code applies in the situation.

Rick has a long minute of confusion. He does not like whatever Spencer implies. _Where did she find this idiot?_ He asks with concern for Michonne and mostly for the children. Rick does not answer, and he only closes the door at Spencer's face.

" Your boyfriend is an idiot," Rick hears himself say before he can think of how inappropriate he sounds, " sorry,"

" he isn't my boyfriend, and he's an idiot." Michonne replies with a smile, " No need to apologize. I had a lapse of judgement for secret reasons when I said yes to a date with him." She adds with slight mischief in the whisper of her voice.

Her words appease Rick more than he would like to admit. Rick looks at Michonne, and everything begins to jolt a memory. He would ask about his fantasies if RJ was not awake and clinging at Michonne. He draws a deep breath, and he needs to move away from her. He finds her too charming and classy. He would pay to breathe the same air than her. Therefore, Rick finds the thought that Michonne paid to fuck him so ludicrous.

" I'm going to check on other patients, and anything doesn't hesitate to call for me," Rick announces, and he needs to leave for his sanity.

…

…

…

"Doctor Richard?" A sleepy RJ calls for Rick.

Rick halts at the door, and he turns to face RJ. The little boy has extended his arms. Rick's eyes drift to Michonne, and he does not know if she approves. RJ is, first of all, a patient, and in his line of job, it is a dangerous mistake to form an attachment to the patients. However, Rick fails to barricade his heart against RJ. The boy easily speaks to his heart. Rick can put a finger on what draws him to Michonne's son.

" He wants a hug," Michonne clarifies to Rick when he does not move from the door, " He is going to begin a tantrum if he does not get it." Michonne softly adds.

Rick walks back into the room. He stands in front of Michonne, and he does not fail to notice how gorgeous she is. He extends his hand to hug RJ, and it is an intricate balance not to hug Michonne too. Although, he wants nothing else. They look like a small family with RJ squeezed between them. Rick wonders why he has the thought. _A family, fuck._ He has to clear his mind before it gets out of hands.

" RJ, you have to let go of doctor Richard," Michonne tenderly demands when RJ continues to hug Rick for an endless minute.

" No," RJ replies, and he attempts to move from Michonne to Rick.

Michonne throws an apologetic look toward Rick. RJ is not the most sociable kid. He is only clingy with his mother. Now, Rick is receiving exclusive treatment, and Michonne has no explanation for the speed of RJ's attachment to Rick. It has a lot to do on how Rick reacts to RJ.

"baby, doctor Richard has to work." Michonne attempts to cajole her son.

RJ peers at Rick and his big bright eyes hold a question. Rick cannot resist the sweet child, and he does not think he will deal well with RJ's tantrum. Something about the kid softens Rick. They have begun to form a delicate bond. He never happened before to Rick. He has a similar experience with Judith.

Rick takes RJ in his arms, and the little boy tightly hugs Rick's neck. He checks his watch, and Rick can afford to spend a few minutes more with his favourite patient. He never had a favourite patient before RJ. He carefully holds RJ, and to Michonne's quiet apology, he offers an understanding smile.

" He is cranky, and he had a long day," Rick says to assure Michonne that he understands, " He is going to sleep, and I will check everything tomorrow." He adds while RJ is playing with his hair.

Michonne looks at the pair, and they are adorable. She has enough kids with Rick Grimes, but she would not be against giving him another one. He appears to be a natural. He is so careful with RJ. Michonne draws a deep breath, and she chastises herself for not continuing to search for him.

" You're good with children," Michonne points out, and she is fishing for information.

" Professional requirement," Rick replies with his focus on what RJ attempts to tell him.

" No children yet," Michonne dares to ask, and her heart beats too fast while she anticipates the answer.

_He is a fucking catch. Probably has two and a half children with the perfect woman. Not that bitch _Michonne bitterly thinks, and she remembers how badly her last lead to finding Rick turned. She does her best to erase the memory.

" busy job, and I have never seen myself in the father role. The anxiety…" Rick halts when he notices that he is opening to a stranger, " Not ready." He adds to fill the awkward silence.

He has yet to have the children conversation with Lori, but he wants to tell Michonne how he feels. Rick always had anxiety about children. He has a ridiculous instinct that he is missing something.

" I got my babies in a very unexpected way, but they are the best thing in my life," Michonne says, and she wants to share with Rick. " I panicked during the first year." She admits with a soft smile.

Michonne feels comfortable around Rick. How tender he is with RJ might help to strengthen the feeling of comfort.

" If I have children, I would want you to have mine," Rick blinks a second, and he does not notice for a minute how odd his statement is. "sorry, nightshift brain. I meant that I would love to have children as sweet as yours. They are adorable." Rick quickly corrects himself.

" Thank you, but they're adorable exclusively for you," Michonne replies, and Rick Grimes does not notice her sincerity.

" I'm special…" Rick jokes.

_Yeah, their father_. Michonne only thinks the word, and she does not say anything. She does not have to think of a response, as RJ steals the focus.

" A song?" RJ abruptly slips out of his slumber, and he looks at Rick expectantly.

" Someone is ready to sleep," Michonne informs Rick, and she reaches for her son, " I will handle it."

" I know a few songs, " Rick replies, and it is so odd that he does not want the moment to finish. " I can sing to him what my mother sang when I was a child." He eagerly says.

Michonne has no heart to argue. She nods, and she makes herself small. Michonne hardly holds the tears. She dreamed of nights like this one. Nights when Judith, Carl, and RJ would have their father put them to sleep. Michonne attempted to make it a reality. However, she never thought it would happen this way.

She allows Rick's lullaby to soothe the ache in her heart. His voice is so warm and melodious. Oddly, he sings Carl's favourite lullaby. She thinks about Rick meeting her son, and she does not know what emotion is the most powerful.

" Carl's song," RJ complains, and he wants his song, " Doctor Richard, my song please." He asks so politely that Rick would not dream to say no.

Rick looks at Michonne for help, and he is not letting RJ down. He fully intends to sing along with Michonne. Rick sits on RJ's hospital bed. He delicately repositions RJ in his arms. Michonne hesitates to sit by his side, and so she takes the sofa by the bed. She moves a curl away from RJ's face.

"En la Puerta del cielo venden zapatos. Pa' los angelitos que están descalzos" Michonne begins to sing, and she is a better singer than Rick can ever dream to be.

However, Rick knows the song. He finds it odd because it is a small flamenco song and not a lullaby. Rick has an odd love for flamenco, and Shane often mocks him about it. What southern man finds himself with a passion for traditional Spanish songs?

"Nadie a ti te ha conta'o que ningún sueño. Sabe de horas o tiempos, ni tiene dueño…" Rick continues instead of repeating what Michonne says, and she looks at him with a very well hidden fascination.

RJ only needs the chorus to fall asleep, and he easily does in Rick's arm. Rick delicately places RJ in the bed, and he turns to face Michonne. The atmosphere between them becomes tense. They both have a lot to say, and they are fighting very primal needs.

Rick is the first one to put some distance between Michonne and him. He is the one with a job to lose. Michonne replaces Rick at his previous spot, and she takes RJ's hand.

" Thank you," Michonne whispers, and she does not want to wake RJ up, " I will have a conversation with him about bothering you, Doctor Grimes."

Rick looks at Michonne, and the way his name rolls off her tongue is sinful. He is curious to hear if it sounds the same way in other circumstance.

" There is no need," Rick reassures Michonne, and he liked singing flamenco to RJ. He does not dare to say it, but he imagines ideal fatherhood to go that way, " flamenco is an odd choice," He clears his throat.

Michonne quietly giggles, and she could not say it better than he did. However, she cannot explain why her children are so fond of those songs with loud guitar and eerie voices.

" He did not get it from me. I did not know and still does not know much of flamenco. I don't understand why he likes it so much." Michonne confesses. " We had a family trip in Andalusia, and they came back from a spectacle with a new passion for flamenco. I' m never forgiving my mom for introducing my children to it."

" The guitar, well I love the aggressive guitar." Rick shares with Michonne, and she resists the impulse to shout that they have solved the mystery.

" It drives me mad," Michonne sighs, and she looks at RJ's sleeping frame, " but he loves it so much." She adds with a little smile. " I know I asked before, but I need to know…" She does not dare to finish her statement.

The thought of impropriety does not cross his mind, and Rick takes Michonne's hand. His thumb rhythmically caresses her palm.

" We will wait for the results, and I'm confident that it would be the best prognostic." Rick states, and he does not say it to comfort Michonne, " And then I will do everything in my power to help him. I promise," He adds, and he rises his pinky finger for Michonne to shake out of the habit of dealing with children.

" Thank you," Michonne replies, and she only needs to cling on her faith.

She twists her finger around Rick's one, and she hesitates to look in his eyes. Somehow, she knows that the time is inappropriate for a confession. However, Michonne wants to have a person able to understand her anguish. Sasha and her parents are supportive, but RJ is not their child. Rick feels like a crutch to lean on for a minute. However, Michonne believes that it might take away RJ's chances of recovery.

For a minute, their fingers remain hooked. The room is silent, and RJ's quiet breath echoes on the walls. They barely notice how close of each other they have drifted.

"Maybe…" Rick whispers the word, and he is not thinking right.

He cannot completely blame his raging libido. The draw is beyond sexual, and it feels like reconnecting with an old crush. The intensity is crushing. Michonne's warmth almost lures him. Michonne's fragrance is enticing.

"Yeah…" She is out of breath.

Michonne understands the need for distance. She is keeping a huge secret from Rick. She should not be thinking of doing what got her in this situation. Six years ago, she should have walked out of that apartment.

" I will need my finger," Michonne manages to use her reason.

"Hun," Rick has a moment of confusion.

Pieces of memories assault him. Rick stares at Michonne, and her visage is beyond familiar. Why would he want to forget her? He has been in her presence less than three times, and he is a mess. Having sex with Michonne would have wrecked Rick. He would have crushed on her the longest, and Rick fails to make sense of the situation.

" my pinky…" She repeats with her usual softness.

" oh…oh, yeah..." Rick clears his throat, and he drops Michonne's finger with regrets, " Sorry," He bites his lower lips, and he does not appear to be remorseful, "I'm going to earn my salary. If anything with you… no anything with RJ, don't hesitate. I'm all yours…I meant I'm available through the night." Rick sighs, and He pinches his nose with exasperation.

He was a Gigolo, and he is stuttering in front of a woman who probably could care less about him. Rick attempts to steal a breath. _You have a fiancé._ He chastises himself for his thoughts.

" I meant that you can have the nurse call me if you need me for anything." Rick clarifies, and he cannot completely erase the double entendre.

"I will do just that, Doctor Grimes," Michonne replies, and she cannot help her following statement, " call you for my needs." She whispers with a sensuality, which makes Rick silently curse.

" You do that," He manages to untwist his tongue, " my beeper is beeping. I have to go…yeah, I have to walk out of the room to go." Rick adds while he opens the door.

Michonne stares at the door, which closes. She turns to face her son. She has a giddy expression, and she cannot fathom how to tone her smile down.

* * *

"I think you were right," Rick reluctantly says, and he knows Shane is wearing a smug smile.

" I was right you fucked her, you want to fuck, and you are going to fuck her," Shane asks with a cocked eyebrow.

He looks at Rick, and he has his answer. Although, Rick will never admit that Shane is right on all three points. Rick throws his coat on the bed in his on-call room. Shane searches his pocket, and he passes a nicotine gum at Rick.

" Do you have to be so gross with it?" Rick sighs, and he deflects, " I think we had sex," He clarifies.

Shane stares at his best friend. He only has a word on the tip of his tongue. He carelessly throws himself on the bed.

"bullshit," Shane says with a laugh, " to Cesar what belongs to Cesar, and I am calling it now you're going to fuck and catch feelings." He adds with a grin.

Rick sighs, and he sits on the chair. He crosses his arms, and he is ready to argue on why Shane is not completely right.

" You don't like her, but I have a great fiancé. You know someone who I'm dating. A fiancé, Lori, and I don't go around cheating on my fiancé." Rick emphasizes.

_Begin to think about her around Michonne. _ Rick's mind is traitorous.

" Good, let her keep the ring as a consolation prize." Shane replies, and Rick's claim leaves his best friend unfazed, " six years have passed, and I get it you wanted stability after all those women. You needed something normal and genuine, but Richard, Lori ain't it. You know it, I know it, and now, your penis know it too." He adds with a sharpness to his argument.

"How many hours?" Rick asks Shane, and he checks his watch, " You are getting weak and talking shit after thirty-four hours awake."

Shane laughs, and he understands that Rick is deflecting. His best friend is loyal to a fault, and Rick decided to give his loyalty to the wrong woman. Shane can predict an unhappy marriage and an expensive divorce. Rick does not deserve any of those fates. He is only a man who has a past, which he feels the need to erase because he has strong values. However, medical school costs an arm, a kidney, a liver. _Fuck it, a pure soul is cheaper than med school_. Shane summarizes and escorting paid very well.

" That stability and respectability, which you want so bad, won't come with marrying Lori. You're obsessing on another woman. God only knows if she had the same effect om you in the past as that girl." Shane switches onto a serious approach.

Rick stares at Shane, and he fails to make sense of what Shane says. Rick's time as a gigolo was uneventful. He fucked and got paid. He kept a complete detachment from the job. He did not want to have Shane's trouble with the clients. The world of prostitution quickly could become dark.

" What girl?" Rick needs clarification.

" Richard," Shane cocks an eyebrow, " Oh my god," He shakes his head in disbelief, " You're blocking memories from that time. I mean you never told me a name, but for a week, she ruined my life. I had to hear about the fucking humiliation. She gave you a tip, and you wanted to ask her out." Shane expands on the topic.

" Never happened," Rick denies, and he fails to remember what Shane implies. " I always made sure to keep it professional." He insists.

Shane stares at Rick most clinically. The solution is staring at him. He pops a nicotine gum, and he regrets promising Rick to quit smoking.

" You did not block your other clients from your mind. You did not care enough to lock those memories," He knowingly points out. " She is probably the girl who crushed your ego," He concludes.

"I'm not suppressing anything," Rick argues, " six years is a long time, and it could have been right when I started escorting. That would be nine years ago. People forget."

" They do, but you don't." Shane counters, " You need to fucking look into it."

Rick sighs, and he stares at the ceiling of the on-call room.

" so you know, I'm not going to have sex with a patient's mother. I'm not risking my job. Fuck, I have a fiancé. This is not funny. " Rick needs to express his frustration. " I'm probably wrong. I'm horny and well…" He does not have a valid explanation.

" Check your client list, and you would know." Shane wisely suggests, " the bet is open, and I got you an appointment for your prenup." He changes the topic.

" You never give up," Rick sighs, " When?" He does not bother for another argument.

"Wednesday, you have the day off." Shane replies, " and check your client list before you go insane." He insists, and he moves out of the bed.

" I'm going to sleep a minute, and I would not forget fucking Michonne "goddess" Barnes. When you fucking breath the same air than her, you will understand, Shane." Rick clarifies, and he slides on the bed.

" You sound whipped, Mr I have a fiancé." Shane mocks.

" I have a fiancé, but I am not blind." Rick defends himself. " Nicotine gums are shit by the way," he declares as he spits the gum in the trash.

" Who wanted to stop smoking. Fucking sleep and dream of your girl, Grimes." Shane walks to the door.

" I don't spend my nights fantasizing about her," Rick sighs with exasperation.

" I said your girl." Shane points out that Rick's mind should have gone to Lori.

"Fuck you," Rick yawns.

" Enjoy your dream, Rick." Shane laughs on his way out of the room.

* * *

_Rick kisses her neck, and he rests his chin on the crook of her neck. His teeth sink in the soft skin of his shoulder. His fingers tightly hold her dreadlocks. Sheer coat of sweat makes her perfectly defined muscles glisten. Her skin is perfect and so smooth. _

_He dreams to touch her forever. Rick's hand disappears between Michonne's thighs. She moans, and Rick has never heard a more suave sound. His fingers continue to rub on her clitoris, and Michonne's cunt perfectly sheaths his cock. _

_Rick's tongue licks his bite mark, and his tongue draws the curvature of Michonne's neck. His lips cover her earlobe. He sucks on the shivering skin, and Michonne reaches from Rick. _

"_Tell me how you like it," He whispers in her ear, and his breath cools her feverish skin. _

_Michonne's throat is dry, and she might have lost her voice between the raw cries. She has no mind to reply. She eases into Rick's slow and suave rhythm. She tilts her head to kiss him, and her passion is consuming. Between lazy strokes, Rick draws Michonne's needs. He pries his mouth from her bruised lips to kiss the curve of her back. _

_He feels so perfect in her. Rick has the perfect balance between tenderness and roughness. However, he always anticipates what she wants before she thinks of it. His hand digs in her waist, and the roughness is what she wants now. Although, his lips claimed hers with tenderness.  
_

_Each of his kisses creates a thirst for more, and she has a better handle. His tongue knows how to establish a pace, which she can follow. It is overwhelming, and yet it is never enough. Her lungs scream for air, but she wants so much of him. Michonne bites Rick's lower lip, and she cramped her body to his to get more of him. He goes deeper, and she feels so full. Michonne's body begins to scream from release. She had an orgasm previously, and his tongue earns him her first orgasm. However, this feels different.  
_

_She bounces and rolls chasing after a sensation, which makes every inch of her body feel alive. She feels a fire pool in her core. Rick tells her suave words, and his naughtiness is sensual. His strokes are deeper and harder. Michonne's body tingles, and the inches of her skin are burning. A few strokes push her from the edge. Rick soon follows. For a few minutes, his weight comfortably crushes Michonne. Her cunt continues to sheath his dick. Rick's breaths caress her hot skin. _

_The room is quiet, and their bodies have melted into each other. Rick rolls on the side, and he pulls out of Michonne. He drags the condom off his penis, and he throws it to the floor. In their haze, they fail to notice that it broke. _

_Michonne lies on her flank, and she stares at Rick. He does the same. The house begins to disappear after half an hour. Rick has a moment of panic. He cannot stop thinking about breaking his rules. _

_She has the softest expression. He wants to be as reckless as he is by nature. He wants to take her out, and before going at it, they had the sweetest conversation. Rick feels stupid, and he always wonders how Shane allows his emotions to take over. _

_Now, he understands. Some people feel like a unique pearl. Michonne feels like a taste of perfection. Rick draws a deep breath, and he is oddly timid. The Casanova has disappeared to allow Richard Grimes to exist. The connection must be pure, and Rick needs it to be real. He does not like being a gigolo, but if it made him cross Michonne's path, he is going to thank heaven.  
_

"_I …" He begins to stutter, and he does not know how to ask her for something innocent like a coffee or better he wants a date._

" _is it a credit card or cash?" Michonne asks with a distant tone. _

_She begins to leave the bed. Rick blinks, and his already weak confidence plummets. __**Fucking idiot, **__he immediately chastises himself for the hope. _

_" Sorry," He asks with wavering hope.  
_

" _Do you tip a prostitute?" Michonne asks, and she reaches for her wallet, " I mean a gigolo or a prostitute. Do you take tips for you know? The orgasm…" her words are enough to put Rick to his place. _

"_The orgasms are on the house." He replies without having the heart to care beyond the humiliation._

_Michonne stares at Rick, and she opens her wallet. The aftermath is awkwardness. She takes a thousand dollars, and she delicately places it by him. _

" _For a job well done… I think you earn your tips." Michonne smiles, and Rick has a moment of anguish, " Thank you." She adds. _

"_I…" _

Rick's beeper goes off, and he immediately stares at his crotch. As usual, he has to deal with a hard. Although, he has a moment of confusion. He does not want to dwell on his dream.

_Fuck_. He curses, and his mind already has taken hold of the issue. Did she reject him brutally? Rick has no time to answer. His phone begins to ring, and Shane has sent him a message.

**How the fuck could you… I have proof. A living proof. **

* * *

" Your dad is way too adorable," Michonne tells a sleeping RJ, " A recipe for disaster, I tell you." She sighs, " Why can he not be a Spencer? No, he has to be this…" she does not even know how to explain Rick _sexy_ Grimes. " Mama is going through it, but he is going to save your life. It is all that matters." Michonne leans, and she kisses RJ's head.

Michonne's phone rings, and she looks at the message incoming.

**We are going to head home, and Carl wants to kiss his mama goodbye. Judith is asleep. **Michonne reads, and it means that she has to run on the other side of the hospital.

**Give me a minute. **Michonne sends the message.

She carefully opens the door, and Michonne hopes Spencer had the intelligence to leave. She feels relieved to face an empty corridor. Michonne begins to rush toward the other side of the hospital to meet her best friend and her children.

**Oh wait, I lost him. Michonne, I lost Carl. **Michonne reads the message, and she knows not to panic immediately.

Sasha would lose her head if it was not on her neck, and Carl is not a child who likes to roam. He is not missing as per se, but Sasha only has a moment of distraction.

**Did you leave my son in a bathroom again or a corridor?** Michonne asks with amusement because it is the fifth time, and so far, nothing truly happened beside Sasha pointless panic.

**Maybe a corridor. ** Sasha sends a reply.

* * *

Shane checks his watch, and he is going through thirty-six hours of the shift. Despite his lack of sleep, he knows with certainty that he is far from hallucinating. He needs at least two more days before he begins to lose his sanity. He has experiences on the matter. Whatever better whomever he is seeing now is a very young Rick Grimes, Rick Grimes' secret child, or a ghost.

Only two options are plausible because Rick would never keep a secret as big as a child from him. Shane stares at the little boy wandering aimlessly by his ward. Any other day, he would not care, he is not in the babysitting business, but tonight, curiosity guides him. Shane slowly approaches the little boy.

" Hello," Shane says when he ultimately stands in front of _mini Rick Grimes._

With a proper glance at the boy, he is not a ghost. Therefore, something defying science has happened. Rick Grimes must have shrunken. No other options are logical because Rick does not have a son. If he ever had one, Shane would be the godfather. Therefore, mini Rick Grimes is the actual shrunken version of Rick.

The little boy looks at Shane, and curiosity shines through his eyes. The eyes, which are very much Rick Grimes like, suspiciously stares at Shane. Shane returns the curious look. He needs to solve the mystery. He looks around, and the little boy appears to be alone.

_Maybe he is a ghost _ Shane fails to explain the odd encounter. He shakes his watch to make sure that he does not lack sleep enough to hallucinate. _Thirty-six hours,_ he crushes the idea. He had had a long day, but nothing out of the ordinary. This little boy is real, and he is wearing his best friend face.

" So you are the silent type mini-Rick," Shane states. " let try this again," He draws a deep breath, " Hello, mini-Rick."

The little boy looks around him, and he returns his eyes on Shane.

"Carl," The boy corrects with a tiny frown and a displeased expression. " Hi," He cautiously replies.

" Carl?" Shane repeats with an odd expression marrying his features.

_Stupid Rick Grimes. No, wait… Carl is a very ghostly name._ Shane begins to convince himself because Rick Grimes does not have a secret son. With a longer look, Shane assumes Carl is around five years old. Rick Grimes is not good with secrecy, and he would not be able to hide a hamster for five days. Therefore, hiding a child for five years is out of his competences.

" Are you doctor Richard?" Carl asks after a glance at Shane's stethoscope.

RJ told him that doctor Richard has a bell things around his neck. Carl looks at Shane's stethoscope with excitement. He wants to reach for it, but his mother will not be happy if he touched anyone thing without asking first. Carl pulls back his hand.

" Doctor Richard, as in Rick Grimes?" Shane needs clarification.

Carl takes s second to consider his answer. He eventually nods. Rick internally screams _betrayal._

" No but I am going to meet him, and I will gladly take you to him."

**How the fuck could you… I have proof. A living proof.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for the reviews**

**I don't own the walking dead **

**Please, review.**

* * *

**Chapter III**

* * *

_The two pink sticks cloud her view. Michonne wipes the tears, which have begun to fall on her cheeks. She lies on the floor of her parents' bathroom. Her entire world spins, and she needs to vomit. Michonne hurries to the toilets, and she empties her stomach._

_"My life is over," Michonne moans when she feels a new wave of nausea. _

_A hand holds her locks, and she is thankful for her mother's presence. Evelyn reluctantly sits on the bathroom floor, and she sighs at the thought of ruining her tailored suits. _

_"You're exaggerating, Mimi," Evelyn states while her hand softly rubs Michonne's back. _

_"Is she though?" Sasha argues, and she sits on the fancy marble surroundings the bathroom sink. "I mean... She is pregnant with the child of a narcissist, who gave her a weak dick." She adds with a lamenting tone._

_"Sasha, shut up." Michonne immediately says, and she does not need to hear the truth so bluntly put. "Can you shut up?" She insists with an ounce of anger._

_"This stupid stick is wrong," Michonne says with a quiet hope as she looks at her home kit pregnancy test._

_Sasha and Evelyn exchange a look, which Michonne witnesses. She should not have told them. Now, Michonne would have to deal with the unfiltered truth. _

_"You said the same thing about the hospital test, sweetheart." Evelyn conveniently reminds her daughter. _

_The home kits are unnecessary. Michonne wants to be stubborn, but as far as medicine is concerned, she is pregnant. However, pregnancy is the last thing, which Michonne wants to deal with in her tumultuous life._

_"Because who goes for the flue and ends up pregnant," Michonne argues._

_She wants to believe that it is a flu. Michonne feels another rush of acid and bile. If she continues, she will vomit her insides. It is only eight in the morning. _

_"Everyone…" Evelyn points out, and Michonne wants to kick her out of her bathroom. "I mean so many people that it's a movie cliché." She dispassionately adds._

_Evelyn does not understand Michonne's panic. She continues to hold her daughter's hair, and she pats Michonne's back._

_"Shut…" Michonne immediately stops when she meets her mother's glare, "I didn't mean it." She clarifies, and she believed the comment came from Sasha, "I'm pregnant." Michonne laments, and she has a hard time saying the sentence. _

_"Now, that we have a consensus. What is your next move?" Evelyn asks, and she remains unfazed by the situation._

_Michonne is having a breakdown while her mother sees no reason to panic. Michonne is twenty-five, and she has a steady job. Money is not a problem. _

_"Mom," Michonne sighs._

_"I need you to be aware that you have options," Evelyn replies without missing a beat. "Whatever suits you and makes you happy. You are merely pregnant. It could be worse from 'enjoying' sex without protection." She purposely draws air quotation marks around the word enjoying because she heard enough of Mike and Michonne's sex life. _

_"We're not talking abortion on the floor of your bathroom next to a cup filled with urine." Michonne replies, and she does not want to talk about her pregnancy too, "We're not discussing abortion at all." She adds with determination._

_"It's an important discussion," Sasha adds her two cents._

_"I know, but when I'm truly pregnant, we can speak about everything." Michonne argues, "This test is fucking wrong."_

_"Michonne," Evelyn warns, and she does not know why her daughter likes cursing as much as she does._

_"Mama, I'm in emotional distress." Michonne points out, and she lifts the test for a reminder. "This is a mistake."_

_"A hospital positive test. Two home kit tests, which are positive. What else do you need to admit that you had unprotected sex with a man, who should not have received the great gift of your body?" Evelyn asks with a tone who sounds like a mild exasperation at her daughter stubbornness._

_"Mama," Michonne does not want to hear the truth, and she cannot be pregnant. "Please," she begins to feel exhausted, "There are nine more tests. If they are all positive, you can freely lecture me on having unprotected sex with my very long term boyfriend." She finishes with frustration. _

_Michonne grabs another test, and she dips it in the urine cup. _

_She puts the timer on, and she anxiously stares at her watch._

_"Ex-boyfriend…" Sasha immediately corrects, but she subtly questions Michonne. _

_Sasha hopes her best friend did not rekindle the old flames with Mike. She has a personal hate club for Michonne's ex-boyfriend. _

_"When we had the unprotected sex, he was my boyfriend." Michonne clarifies._

_"Perhaps, the Lord is kind enough to have you pregnant with someone else," Evelyn suggests._

_In a similar fashion to Sasha, Michonne's mother hates Mike. So far, Mike is the only issue to Michonne's potential or accurately confirmed pregnancy._

_"Who else could have knocked me up?" Michonne asks, and she did not have unprotected sex with anyone else. _

_"Richard," Sasha suggests. _

_"A prostitute," Michonne argues, and she has a moment of bitterness for reason, which Sasha knows. A few weeks ago, Michonne attempted to book another night with Rick, and she got no reply. "Pregnant of a prostitute is God's kindness to you." She scoffs at Sasha's statement._

_"Anyone is better than Mike, and at least, you got an orgasm out of it." Evelyn intervenes, and she never hid her dislike for Mike._

_"Mama," Michonne sighs, and she forgets of her turmoil to argue with her mother._

_"My humble opinion," Evelyn says with a small smile. _

_"Well, your humble opinion has no relevance. I had protected sex with Richard." Michonne announces, and she knows it. Every single round, Richard made sure to use a condom. "Mike was my longtime boyfriend, and…" The timer interrupts Michonne._

_"What does the test say?" Sasha asks._

_"Pregnant," Michonne reads, and she grabs a new test, "I can't be pregnant." She insists. _

_"Sweetheart," Evelyn softly calls for Michonne, "You're pregnant." She adds with tenderness._

_Evelyn opens her arms to hug Michonne. Michonne crawls in her mother's arms. She rests her head on Evelyn's chest, and the tears begin to flow. The silence befalls on the room. Evelyn and Sasha exchange a look. Sasha comes to sit on the floor by the mother and daughter pair._

_The timer again breaks the silence. Michonne picks the pregnancy test. The result remains the same. She hugs her mother with more strength._

_"I'm pregnant with Mike's child_,"

* * *

Rick stares at his phone, and he fails to explain Shane's message. He wisely disregards his friend's words, and he glances at his pager. Rick sighs, and he needs to clear his mind. The stupid nicotine patch on his arm is not doing its job.

_Why did I stop smoking again? _He bitterly thinks. In a month like this one, he deserves an emotional crutch to lean on, and Lori is the last person, who he might consider as a pillar. His phone begins to ring, and Rick groans. He is not going to catch a break tonight.

"What's going on?" Rick replies without a glance at the caller id.

On his emergency work phone, Rick only receives priority calls. After that dream _or nightmare, _Rick remains uncertain on the proper terminology. _Dream, fantasy. Michonne's presence automatically makes it a dream. _Rick's heart and libido are rather impartial on the topic, but his mind is suffering through the constant flow of memories. Nothing makes sense, and his instincts are screaming that he takes note of something obvious.

"Rick?" Lori's voice fills his ear, "Finally, you pick a call," she adds with judgement and suspicion in her phone.

Rick foresees the path, which the conversation might follow. He checks his watch, and she has no sane reasons to call him at two in the morning. He draws a deep breath to remain levelheaded. Perhaps, Lori is calling over an emergency.

_Has she ever called for an emergency once? _ Rick does not believe to the excuses, which he attempts to offer on Lori behalf.

"We had this conversation before, Lori." Rick sighs, and his fingers come to rest on the bridge of his sharp nose. "I don't pick calls because my phone is off while I'm trying to remain alert and non-distracted during an endless night." He yet explains again.

"But you can pick this call," Lori offers her rebuttal.

She does not for once second believe Rick. Is she stupid to believe an ex-gigolo? Above all, she needs him on a tight leash. Although, Lori has begun to learn that Rick Grimes is a wild card. Behind his calm exterior boils a temper, and Rick is also harder to manipulate. Lori's salvation resides in Rick's moral compass. Every day, he appears to have less interest in their nuptials. Lori is panicking.

"It's my fucking work's phone, and you're doing nothing but delaying life and death emergency." Rick clarifies.

He draws a deep breath, and Rick has to remind himself not to implode. Rick has not forgotten how Lori got that number. She duped a gullible nursing intern. Rick shakes his head to throw that thought.

"Rick…" Lori softly says, and she pursues, "You have no idea how awful it is to spend those lonely nights. It's as if you care about everything in that hospital more than you care for me. Those fucking nurses, the walls, the sick kids are all you care for, and when I'm trying to reach you, you want to be loud and wrong about it." She finishes with an angry tone.

Rick sighs, and he does not have the luxury to fight. He checks his watch, and he rises to leave the room. He needs fresh air, and he needs a cigarette. Lori always has the mean to drive him insane.

"Why?" Rick laments, and he does not want to hear any explanation.

Whatever Lori might want to say will only infuriate him. He mindlessly roams the corridor while Lori begins another rant. She fails to understand Rick's lack of interest in their relationship. Even conflicts no longer hold his mind.

"You ask the same question every time. Do you care about us or me?" Lori probes and he has not uttered a word since she began to vent.

"No," The answer is sincere, and Rick has not taken a second to polish his answer.

A pregnant pause chokes the conversation. Lori stutters for a long minute, and Rick has no idea of what he said. He checks his watch with annoyance.

He stops at the door, and Rick draws a hard breath. He massages his temples to diffuse the building headache. Rick looks at the door, and the conversation with Lori hardly matters.

"How can you so openly say it? Do you fucking feel as if getting married is a joke?" Lori fails to contain her anger.

"Lori, do you understand timing?" Rick kindly asks, "Do you have a notion of what is appropriate?" he insists with frustration, "You want to talk about marriage and wedding at two in the morning while I'm at work and burning out." He demands with utter confusion, "You won't like anything coming out of my mouth because I will tell you what I think, and we both know that you do not like the truth." Rick ends with growing exasperation.

Another minute of silence follows, and Lori brushes over her thoughts.

"You seem to forget what I went through with you," Lori states with unhidden grudges, "You seem to forget that I took you while knowing how broken and miserable you were. I didn't care for that ugly and dirty past, Mr Gigolo." She spits with viciousness.

"I…" Rick fails to find the proper answer.

The conversation has reached its rough patch. Rick leans against the door, and he feels the weight of Lori's words. He is nothing but grateful and compliant with her wishes.

"You're damaged-good, Rick…" Lori says with frustrated chuckles, "you know how good I'm to you. Begin to look at this wedding as what it is. A fucking blessing to you and a way to forget that past." She finishes with the intent to close the conversation.

"We need a prenup," Rick replies, and for one, Lori's words have chilled his blood.

"What?" Lori asks with confusion.

"A prenup," Rick repeats, "look, I need to work. We can have this conversation again. It would only be the umpteenth time, and you can go on about how generous and holy you are for not judging my past as a gigolo. I was grateful enough to pay for the ring, which you picked." He finishes with a sharp tone.

"Rick?" Lori drowns into shock, and she cannot fathom how Rick's answer came to be, "Your friends are getting into your mind?" She begins with the intent to expend.

Rick sighs, and he decides to hang up. He draws a deep breath, and he angrily shoves his emergency phone in his pocket. _What are you doing with her?_ Rick thinks with bitterness. For the first time, he does not have a clear answer. He always had a vague idea that he was unhappy, but tonight, he strongly feels how miserable he is with Lori. Perhaps, he has new perspectives.

…

…

…

Rick's mind halts, and he fears to confront the truth. He stares at the door, which he faces, and the answer is hard to ignore. He should walk away, but he has not found any second of peace. Rick carefully pushes the door open.

"Mama…" RJ calls with the hope that Michonne has returned, "You're back," He sounds relieved, "I had a nightmare." He continues to speak with a half-asleep voice.

"Hey," Rick completely pushes the door open, "sorry, it's only me." He replies as he hesitantly enters the room.

"Where is my mama?" RJ asks, and the quivering of his voice announces tears, "She has to take away the nightmares." He softly says, and the words are unclear.

Rick closes the door, and he walks up to RJ's bed. He takes a spot, and he stares at the child. _There's something._ Rick cannot prevent the thought. He feels it that he is missing a detail. He can explain why he has the growing affection for RJ, and how he feels about Michonne does not influence his emotions toward RJ. Amidst the argument with Lori, his mind only had a thought. Rick thought about the minute he spent in this room singing flamenco to this little boy.

"I'm sure your mama will be back soon, but I can help with the nightmare." Rick offers.

RJ stares at Rick while he weights the option. He is not sure Dr Richard is magic like his mother. Although, RJ moves out of his blanket, and he crawls on the bed to come to sit on Rick's lap.

"Do you know how mama does it?" RJ asks Rick with utter seriousness.

"No," Rick genuinely answers, "but you can show me," he encourages.

RJ looks at Rick, and he sighs as if the mission will be impossible. He grabs Rick's arm, and he drags it toward him to enclose his body into a hug. RJ rests his head in Rick's chest.

"Now, you kiss here, Doctor Richard," He points at his forehead.

Rick quickly kisses RJ's forehead, and he expectantly looks at Michonne's son. The boy frowns, and his small hand covers Rick's bigger one.

"It won't go if you don't kiss it a lot." RJ explains, and he believes that Rick does not know how to do it properly, "like this," RJ twists to stand on Rick's lap.

Once successfully standing, he presses his lips on Rick's forehead for as long as he can. His small and chubby hands squeeze Rick's cheeks. Rick's heart stops, and he cannot explain the warmth, which fills his person. He would put words on to it if he were not afraid to admit the existence of such sentiments.

_Don't fucking cry._ He talks to himself, but Rick does not know what to do with his conflicted emotion.

"Now, you do it," RJ's voice grounds Rick.

Rick nods because he can find his voice. He does not know what magic RJ did, but the argument with Lori has become an afterthought.

"Don't judge if I do it badly," Rick feels anxious, and RJ's big brown eyes on him adds to the pressure. Disappointing the child would break Rick, "I know your mama do it better, Rick junior." He says the words without a thought.

Rick kisses RJ's forehead, and he stays as long as RJ did on his forehead. RJ tightens his hug around Rick. A minute passes.

"It's gone…" RJ announces.

Rick does not feel like letting go, and he wants to cling on the moment. There is his instinct roaring. He is chasing after a detail. _What am I missing? _Rick thinks harder than he has done in his life. He again kisses RJ's forehead, and he fears his chin on the crown of his patient's head.

"No more nightmares?" Rick asks, and RJ nods, "okay…" his phone ringing interrupts Rick.

"Not now Lori…" Rick sighs, and he does not want to trade the feeling, which RJ's forehead kiss brought.

"Why would Lori have your emergency number?" Shane asks on the other side, "Never mind, she is a psycho. She must have stolen it from the hospital employees' record. "He adds, "Where are you?"

"Salle six in my ward," Rick replies with a sense of relief that it is Shane on the other side.

"Don't fucking move. You have a lot to explain, Richard Grimes." Shane announces.

Rick looks at RJ on his laps, and he would not be able to move if he wanted. The little boy is playing with Rick's stethoscope while his other hand is hugging Rick.

"What is going on?" Rick senses the chaos on the verge of unfolding.

"You tell me, brother." Shane emphasises the word brother, "the weight of betrayal." He adds with sharpness.

"Shane, how many hours?" Rick asks with suspicions.

"Richard Grimes, I'm on my way." Shane ends the call.

"Will this night ever end?" Rick sighs, and RJ raises his head to look at Rick.

"Doctor Richard, do you have a nightmare?" RJ asks after a glance at Rick's expression.

"Not yet…"

* * *

At the end of the fifth corridor, Michonne's heartbeat begins to plummet. Cold swear covers her forehead, and the sensation of dread licks her muscles. Michonne holds the wall for support, and she fails to breathe. Sasha takes Michonne's trembling hand.

"He is lost…lost?" Michonne asks with her heart dropping, "Sasha, I swear… not now, I cannot deal." Her voice rises with growing panic.

Michonne looks at her best friend, and she does not know how to feel. The night is endless. She looks around the empty corridor, and Michonne has to withhold her tears. From a scare to another, Michonne cannot take more now. _Carl is fine…_ She prays for the words to be truthful.

"Mimi," Sasha draws Michonne out of her mind, and Michonne's glistening eyes lay on Sasha with hope, "I had an eye on him, and then he disappeared." The words shatter what remains of Michonne's strength.

Her body almost slips from the wall, but Sasha catches her waist on time. Michonne looks at her best friend, and she does not know how to express her despair.

"We are not talking about Judith," Michonne stutters, and she chokes on the words, "Carl does not disappear." She adds with fright echoing through every word.

Michonne looks at the empty corridor, and she only wants to see her son. She immediately wipes the tears when they begin to fall. _He is fine. He is fine. _She repeats like a mantra. Michonne draws a painful breath. She fails to hold the tears.

"I know…I know." Sasha says with a comforting tone, and the guilt begins to consume her.

She takes Michonne in her arms, and she tightly hugs her crying best friend. Another day, Michonne would be levelheaded, but following RJ's emergency, her mind jumps to an awful conclusion.

"We can ask for the CCTV," Sasha suggests, and she does her best to remain calm for Michonne's sake, "he cannot be far," she adds with conviction, which should reassure Michonne.

"Sasha…" Michonne breathes, and she forcefully wipes the tears, "I cannot deal tonight," she says with extreme exhaustion, "I'm being a bad mother…" Michonne begins to speak, and she stops Sasha from consoling her, "having three at once always felt impossible. I was so afraid to be bad at motherhood. I don't know what I did wrong. I don't know why everything is happening. I have been thinking…" Michonne does not know how to express the tears, which have begun to rise with RJ's sickness. "My babies…I have nothing more precious. I'm losing them. I know that I'm a shitty mother…I" Sasha's hand slightly colliding with her cheek interrupts Michonne.

For a second, Michonne stares in confusion at her best friend. Sasha sighs, and she had to intervene. She cannot watch Michonne puts herself down when she is amazing as a mother.

"Say something as dumb as that again, and I will slap common sense into you." Sasha threatens, "You're an amazing mother. You're the best mother that I know, and I'm including my mother in the comparison. RJ's sickness is not your fault, and you're going to save him." She challenges Michonne to argue the fact, "I was the one watching Carl, and again, we're going to find him. Do you hear me?" She insists.

"You didn't have to slap me so hard," Michonne rubs her cheek, but she is grateful for Sasha's intervention.

Many thoughts have started to consume her, and she always approached motherhood with hesitation and apprehension. Michonne did not have the greatest time during her pregnancy, and the months, which followed, brought more chaos. However, she eased in motherhood. Now, she feels not so different from the young woman, who thought she was pregnant of her narcissistic ex-boyfriend.

"I'm sorry…" Sasha replies, "Come here." she opens her arms to welcome Michonne, "We're going to find him." Sasha adds without a doubt.

"The CCTV," Michonne decides to focus on what to do.

* * *

Shane looks at his side, and he cannot believe Rick's betrayal. _Carl…he didn't even call the mini Rick, Rick junior_. _Trust Rick Grimes to miss an opportunity._ Shane thinks with amusement. He stares at Carl, and it's almost frightening how everything is identical.

Shane continues to walk the corridor until he finds the room, which Rick mentioned. After a last glance at Carl, he opens the door. The sight in front of him is shocking. For a few seconds, he watches Rick's interact with another mini-Rick. _How many? _Shane has a second of confusion. He questions his mental state and his sight.

"Richard…" Shane hesitantly says, and he looks at the little boy on Rick's lap.

The similarities are unmistakable. The curl pattern is extremely close. Above all, they are both staring at him with a similar expression. From the cocked eyebrow to the little lip twist, Shane does not see the difference. They wait for an explanation on why Shane called their name.

"Shane?" Rick asks with growing confusion at his friend's silence.

Rick's voice suffices to draw Shane's attention. Shane stares at his best friend, and he has a lot to say.

"Lord, you've more than one." Shane fails to organise his thoughts, and the shock has frozen his brain, "Richard fucking Grimes." He looks at his best friend with a mix of shock and awe.

"What are you talking about now? Shane…" Rick does not have the luck to finish his statement.

A blur of black hair rushes toward him, and before, Rick can react, something or rather someone has begun to climb his legs.

"RJ" Carl squeals with joy, and he reaches for his brother.

Rick Grimes has his laps full of children, who are hugging. With confusion, he looks at the second little boy, who precariously crawls on his laps. He is fast enough to stop a fall, and he gathers both boys in his arm.

"Those mini you," Shane points at the boys.

Rick does not have a view of Carl's face, and he attempts to keep them from falling. He struggles to keep them in an embrace.

"Are you having a breakdown?" Rick asks his best friend, "Shane," he insists.

"Rick, don't even…" Shane warns, and he steps in the room to help Rick.

He lifts Carl from Rick's lap, and he holds the little boy very much like Rafiki held Simba. Rick has yet to look up, and he straightens RJ.

"Hello," Carl says with eagerness and glee.

"He…" Rick raises his eyes, and his tongue falters, "Wait…" He attempts again to speak. What can he say now? "Fu…" He stops at the sight of bright blue eyes glistening with joy and interest, "oh my god," Rick gives up in language.

"Carl?" Shane questions Rick on the choice of name, and he brings Carl at face level with Rick.

"Whose child is this?" Rick manages to ask.

_Look like yours_. Rick's mind supplies the answer, but he cannot reasonably accept it. _How?_ He asks while he stares into a perfect replica of himself.

"You're stealing my line." Shane points out.

"Hello," Carl repeats, and he properly extends his hand for Rick to shake.

Rick looks at the small hand. His head is spinning. With hesitation, Rick takes Carl's hand. He is familiar with the feeling of warmth. He does not want to allow the thought, but Rick's eyes drift to RJ, who now stands on his laps to reach Carl.

"Hey… I" Rick softly says, but he stutters on the next word.

"Are you doctor Richard?" Carl asks with excitement, and he is reaching for Rick.

"I am…"Rick replies, and his heart is acting on instinct, "and who are you?" He asks with a clear answer on who the mini-replica is.

"Carl," RJ replies on his brother's behalf.

"What is going on, Shane?" Rick asks while his eyes drift between the children.

"I would like to know why you have two sons, and I didn't know until now. Who is Shane junior between the two?" Shane demands to know.

"Two what…" Rick manages to form a sentence "Whose children," he attempts to clarify his thoughts

"Mama…" both children shout, and they draw the attention at the door.

"Grime?" Shane questions and he has a smile, which Rick refuses to understand,

"Carl?" Michonne rushes toward Carl, and she becomes the answer to Rick's question, "I thought you were lost." She takes Carl from Shane's arm, "baby…" she kisses him repeatedly.

"Mama," Carl squeals.

Rick has a second of panic. His heart stops to restart with violence. He looks at Michonne, and then he looks at RJ. Why did he not see it before tonight? _RJ is a mix of Michonne and the mini-replica of me…_ Rick shakes his head, and the shock stops him to formulate correctly. _RJ is a mix of Michonne and me._ He comes to the obvious conclusion.

"Michonne," Rick breathes her name with panic, and there is a hidden excitement

"Oh, hello." Michonne replies, and she notices the eyes staring at Carl and her, "oh Lord," she says. _Fuck…fuck…fuck_. She immediately thinks, and Rick's expression speaks volume.

Rick and Michonne silently stare at each other. Shane looks at the dynamic, and he could never imagine such a moment.

"We need to have a conversation, Rick," Shane speaks, and he diffuses the tension in the room.

He looks at Rick and Michonne who each hold one of their children. The conclusion is unmistakable to Shane. Michonne and Rick are the parents. _Maury has nothing on me._ He looks at Rick who holds RJ tightly as if he is fear to have the child stolen from him.

"About?" Rick asks without taking his eyes away from Michonne...

"Your secret children," Shane casually unleashes the chaos.

Rick takes in the words, and he cannot argue with breathing proof. He is staring at the evidence who has ultimately grab his stethoscope. Carl places the stethoscope around his neck to look like Doctor Richard. RJ is attempting to fight Rick's grip to steal the stethoscope from Carl. Rick and Michonne have fallen in the eye of the cyclone. They exchange look, and most of Michonne's glances resonate like a confession.

"We had sex," Rick manages to say, and he looks at Carl and then to RJ, "children too?" The question is rhetoric, "My office…" Rick stands, and he carefully puts RJ on the bed.


	5. Chapter 5

**I don't own the walking dead**

**Thanks for the reviews**

**Ps: I know Judith grimes holidays adventure, and so chill people I will give you the thanksgiving one soon. For any other fic update see you in 2020.**

* * *

**Chapter IV**

* * *

"_The baby is white," more than surprise transpires from the statement._

_Taken by a humongous head coming down her vaginal canal and the pain, which it causes, Michonne does not care much for that loud cry. She only wants to push her second child out, and she cannot faint while doing it. She will think about the third baby when he presents himself._

"_Sir, please, can you be silent?" The midwife calmly asks._

_The distress of the soon to be father of three is rather obvious. He draws a deep breath, and he looks at the boy who needs his umbilical cord cut. __**White…snow white type of white…blue eyes type of white**__. Mike stares at the child while they shove a pair of scissors in his hand._

"_The child is white?" He repeats, and he wants to understand what is going on, "The baby is white."_

"_Mike, shut the fuck up…" Michonne shouts while her second baby continues to tear every muscle from her abdomen to her vagina._

"_Miss Barnes, breathe. Here we go again." The obstetrician encourages. "Push."_

_Despite the best effort of the entire room to focus on what matters, Mike Anthony is having an existential crisis. It exponentially becomes worse when another set of lungs release the cry for life._

_They bring the small baby on the cleaning table with a clamp on her umbilical cord. Mike has not moved from his spot. The midwife pushes him away, and she cuts the umbilical cord of the first baby. _

_She brings the second baby, and it is more than Mike can take during these stressful hours. The baby is not only white, but she has blonde hair. __**What in the Scandinavians Caucasian is going on?**_

"_You bitch…" Mike hurls, and he cannot stomach what he sees, "You fucking harlot… These white children are not mine." _

_Only the pain of labour makes Michonne miss the awkwardness and the oddness of the moment. While she focuses on pushing the biggest head in the universe if she says so herself, Mike Anthony is having a breakdown, which the medical personal cannot tolerate._

_When Michonne's third child roars, a syringe pierces Mike's skin to sedate him. The midwives look at each other while Michonne's exhaustively falls against her bed. _

"_My babies," She calls with anxiety._

_Through it all, she has yet to notice that the supposed father of her children is a lump on the floor. One of the midwives carefully brings the triplets toward her. Michonne halts for a second, and she looks at her children._

"_They are so tiny." She says in awe, and she can breathe after falling in love three times, "You're beautiful. Hi, my loves." _

* * *

"We had sex," Rick manages to say, and he looks at Carl and then to RJ, "children too?" The question is rhetoric, "My office…" Rick stands, and he carefully puts RJ on the bed.

"Carl and RJ…" Michonne calls after her sons, "You stay in this room, or God helps me." She warningly says.

They nod in unison, and Michonne searches her mind for any reason to stop the conversation with Rick before it happens.

"Don't worry their uncle Shane will keep an eye on them. No one is posing like a hospital ghost on my watch." Shane winks to Michonne.

Michonne looks at Shane, and she does not know how to proceed. She cannot decide on her next move because Rick forces her to move. He wraps his hand around her wrist, and he tugs without inflicting pain. Michonne has no choice, but to follow him until his office.

…

…

…

Michonne remains glue to the door, and she watches Rick have the oddest reaction. He does not implode nor does he have a breakdown. Rick laughs, and it is as she remembers. He sits on the edge of his desk, and he laughs until he is in tears. He cannot help it, and it is an extreme sign of anxiety.

"Are you okay, Dr Grimes?" Michonne threads carefully.

She has seen her fair share of men losing their mind. Mike comes to mind immediately. She cannot forget the confrontation, which followed the birth of her children. Michonne draws a deep breath, and she has her hand firmly around the doorknob.

"No…No…I'm not good," Rick says between laughs, which refuse to subdue. "I'm the deadbeat dad to two children." He has to hold his abdomen as it becomes painful from the endless laughter.

"Three…" Michonne corrects, and she immediately bites her tongue.

She should have given him the time to digest the two children who he has discovered on his own. _Judith would have been the consolation prize_. She thinks with an inappropriate amusement.

Rick draws a deep breath, and he has to slap himself out of the hysteria. He closes his eyes, and he attempts to regulate his breathing.

"Since when are you pregnant?" He manages to ask.

Michonne looks at Rick, and she searches his office for a way to help. She opens the fridge, and she grabs the bottle of cold water. She walks to where Rick sits, and she pours the cold over his head.

"Fuck…" Rick cries out as the drop of water run along his nose, "enough," He snatches the bottle from Michonne's hand.

"Better?" She asks while she wipes her wet hand on her dress.

"No…" Rick draws a deep breath, "I have two children. I don't like children." He says in an anxious tone.

"Three children," Michonne corrects Rick, and she brushes his last comment.

She would not like children too if she was given suddenly three out of nowhere. _Wait his sperm did that to you. _

"Mini-me, Richard junior, and…" Rick attempts to find out how he has three children when he only has two in the other room.

"Carl, Richard jean, and Judith," Michonne offers. "You met Judith. She is blonde with blue eyes. Almost lead the police to arrest me for kidnapping." She awkwardly chuckles.

Rick rises from his spot, and he looks at Michonne. He does not know how to proceed. How does he react without losing his sanity? Rick has yet to find the answer.

"We had sex…" Rick mumbles, and he needs to take a deep breath, "Like It wasn't some random wet dream."

Michonne cannot help but think that Rick is having an unexpectedly good reaction. It is odd, but he is not threatening to kill her as Mike did. He has not choked her. _Dear Mike did, and Sasha knocked him off for trying it. _

"Well, the kids are real, and we had them the old fashion way." She goes as slowly as he wants to go.

"We had good sex…" He pointedly looks at Michonne.

Michonne does not know how to proceed with Rick's line of questioning. She draws a shaky breath, and she demands patience to the Lord. This man's priorities are all over the place.

….

….

….

"Are you feeling okay?" Michonne repeats the question.

Rick stops pacing, and he looks at Michonne. Why would she ask him such a stupid question? _I have two children…three… Richard doesn't be that man denying his children. I have three children._

"I have two children out of nowhere. Do you get it? I'm a father with no credential to be one." Rick shouts.

He needed to let that shout out, and he addresses an apologetic look to Michonne. Although, he immediately erases it. He has the right to be furious even if he could choose a better target to his rage.

"Three children," Michonne repeats.

She manages to remain oddly unfazed by the seen. Perhaps, Michonne has seen her fair share of craziness. Nothing can beat Mike rant about her harlot's ways. _He called you a bed wench and a slavery apologist. _ Michonne shakes herself out of her thought to face Rick.

"I know… I know how much children I have. Carl, Richard Jean, and Judith." Rick says to prove a point. "You're trying to avoid the subject." He adds.

Michonne pulls a chair to sit. Rick's pacing is giving her vertigo. She had pictured a less comical moment. Michonne had feared drama and tears. However, she presently has to watch Rick shit his pants at the new of having children.

"Which one, the one about how good the sex was…" Michonne rolls her eyes.

"The sex was good," His mind can only focus on the easiest information to process.

Rick feels exhausted, and he stops pacing. He needs to sit before he faints. He stares at Michonne with a sort of annoyance. He stares at the dress, which she wore the night when they conceived the triplets.

"Look, I need a moment to make sense of this. Until tonight, I wasn't aware that you and I intimately knew each other. I know you that way, but it is in my head. I haven't had sex for months, and you're the mother of children." Rick finds himself musing and oversharing.

Michonne sighs and she was once in Rick's shoes. She stands from her chair, and she carefully approaches him. Michonne hesitates for a second, and she rises on her toes to reach Rick's neck. She closes her arms around his neck, and she hugs him as Evelyn did when the first ultrasound showed that she was expecting three children instead of one.

"Now that you know. You have a few seconds to accept that they are half of you. You have to choose if you want to honour that. No one is forcing you to play any role or keep him or her. You have three children, and I will release you when you are at least aware of that detail." Michonne tenderly whispers in Rick's ear.

Michonne has watered down her mother's speech, and she does not think Rick needs to hear the option of abortion and adoption. He surely does not need to hear the passage about big heads and vagina.

Rick does not say anything in return, but he tightens his hug around Michonne. He does not feel as if a few seconds are enough to admit that he is a father of three children. The seconds quickly turn into minutes where a hug is a comfort bubble.

"Carl, Richard Jean, and Judith…" Rick breathes out the name, "Fuck…fuck…fuck." He slowly breaks the hug. "Triplet," Rick feels as if he needs to sit.

…

…

…

Michonne watches him as he nonchalantly sinks in his office chair. He lays his head on his wooden desk, and he allows the cold material to comfort him. He has so many questions, but he fears to start asking them. He raises his head to look at Michonne in the hope that she gives him anything to ground him as the hug did.

"Carl is the oldest. Judith is the middle child, and RJ is the last one. I don't have to say it because it is what gave away the truth, but Carl is your clone. Judith has your eyes, but I can't tell for the love of god why she is blonde. RJ has begun to look like you more and more. I carried those children nine months, and I don't get a clone." Michonne speaks to fill the gap left by the silence.

"My dad is blonde like Scandinavian blonde," Rick replies.

He almost wants to take it back because of how it adds an intangible proof on what he cannot argue. However, her words fascinate Rick. He wants to hear everything. The reality is one, which he begins to accept.

"I didn't plan on being a father. Not now or any time soon… Matter of fact, fatherhood is not in my plan." Rick stutters.

"I said it before…" Michonne begins, but she fails to finish.

She does not feel any form of relief that Rick is refusing to be a father. Michonne searched for Rick as long as she could. _The bitch was right. He would die before wanting anything to do with children_.

"Carl, Judith, RJ…" He says their name by the order of their births. "I have children," Rick says to no one. "How do we work it out? Do you need money? Do you want money?" Rick asks.

Michonne does not think it is worth dignifying his audacity with an answer. _The idiot,_ she bitterly thinks. If she wanted the money, she would have come looking for him. She stands to leave his office.

"Michonne, "Rick calls with a hint of fear.

"Do you think I need money? Do you believe I would use my kids like that? You can walk out of their lives free of charge. You don't have to offer any form of compensation for it." Michonne retorts with frustration, and she is pointing her forefinger toward his face.

"Are you insane?" Rick asks, and he looks at her as if she has grown two heads. "Do you want money to allow me to know them? I'm not dumb enough to start endless custody battles with RJ being sick, but you say they are half of me. I took my decision. I'm aware of them. I want them aware of me." He clarifies the thing.

Michonne sits down, and she never imagined it would go that way. The word custody rings in her head. She wants nothing as dramatic to solve their situation.

"This night is shitty." She breathes the word out, "I need a stiff drink." Michonne sighs.

Rick pushes the half-emptied bottle toward Michonne. She looks at him as if he has lost his mind, but she gratefully takes a long sip.

"I don't need your money." Michonne returns the bottle to Rick, "Can we talk about everything with cool heads?" Michonne asks, and it is a plea. "I had a bad date with the blueprint of every idiot. I'm not overcoming across you and Carl playing who you are."

"When?" Rick insists.

"Any other day, but tonight. I thought I lost Carl. I thought I lost RJ. Can I lose my son to you another day?" Michonne feels exhausted.

"Tomorrow," Rick reluctantly agrees.

"Tomorrow," Michonne replies, "send me the when and the where. I will make it." She replies.

Michonne knows that real conversation will be tomorrow. She rises from her chair, and she begins to leave Rick's office. She stops at the door, and she curiously looks at Rick.

"The sex was extremely good or at least one part." She corrects herself with the knowledge that he forgot who she was.

"I…" Rick has the nagging voice of his conscious mentioning the virtue of ethics. "Thank you." He says with nonchalance as if she had given him an hour.

"Oh okay, I guess." Michonne begins to stutter, and she feels embarrassed for even bringing it up. "Tomorrow…" She stumbles out of Rick's office.

_It is his fucking job to give me orgasm. What did I expect? _ Michonne hurries out of Rick's office.

_Thank you. _Rick hits his forehead. How could he be so game less? _I made it sound like a transaction._

* * *

Shane looks at his best friend's son, and he does not know how Rick missed the obvious. It is almost terrifying how much they resemble him. He eyes them curiously while they do the same with him.

"Who are you?" RJ dares to ask after a minute.

"Your now favourite uncle," Shane replies with a broad smile.

RJ and Carl exchange a sceptical look. Being the eldest one, Carl self- appoints as the one to find out the truth. He comes down of the bed, and he stands in front of Shane.

"What is an uncle?" Carl asks with a certain concern.

Shane blinks at the question. Two pairs of curious eyes prompt him for an answer. How does he answer such a specific question with specific words?

"Do you know what an auntie is?" Shane asks with hope. RJ and Carl nod. "An uncle is an auntie who is a boy." He waits for them to deliberate on the veracity of what he says.

"You're boy Auntie Sasha," RJ frowns, and he is not buying Shane's explanation.

"Who is Auntie Sasha?" Shane feels as confused as RJ and Carl, "I'm Uncle Shane." He clarifies.

RJ and Carl look at each other, and they unanimously approved of Shane's answer. Carl returns to the bed, and he joins RJ into starring at Shane.

"Can you not do that?" Shane says after a few seconds of endless starring, "You're giving me the creeps."

"Where is Mommy?" RJ asks with trembling on his voice.

"Rick is shouting at her," Shane replies without a thought.

He would love nothing else but to hear that conversation.

"Doctor Rick is not mean to mama." RJ begins to argue in tears, which lead to Carl's tears.

"Fuck…" Shane curses, "Y'all think this is a game." He looks at the two children who are now crying their souls out. "What did I do?" He cannot fathom how it ended in tears. "I'm new to this uncle business. Hit me with level one thing like teaching you out to run from home to see a sweetheart. This crying is level ten."

Shane stares at the crying duo, and it only gets worse every time he makes eye contact.

"Are you broken? How do I fix you before Rick returns and kill me for breaking in no longer secret children? Guy, please, stop crying. I mean I will pay you." He drags his wallet out of his coat.

"Mimi?" A voice rises above the cry, and Shane hopes for salvation, "We have to go to the CCTV guys to ask about Carl. Do I need to show cleavage to help?" She says.

"Does cleavage work with children?" Shane asks as he rushes toward them, "I swear I didn't break them in purpose." He points at RJ who Carl is now cradling the best he can.

"Fuck… the pictures were a lie." Sasha gasps, "give me a minute." She tells Shane while she moves toward the children.

"Now who got my babies crying?" She kneels to be at eye level with the toddlers.

Carl raises his head and his chubby finger points at Shane. Sasha turns to look at him, and Shane makes himself small. He would head toward the door if she didn't order him to stay.

"Snitch," He mouths to Carl.

"And why would he do that?" Sasha tenderly asks.

"He said Doctor Richard is mean," RJ replies and he glares at Shane.

"Oh dude, say it right. I say Rick is shouting at your mom." Shane corrects.

"Really?" Sasha sighs, and she glares at Shane, "in the corner and quiet." She adds, and he reluctantly obeys.

"See, I punished him. Is it okay now?" She asks her nephews.

RJ and Carl look at Shane, and they shake their head. Sasha turns to look at Shane, and she winks at him. Shane watches what is happening. He thinks he is having one of this insane moment of horn at first sight. _Now you have a mommy fetish…auntie dominatrix fetish._ He corrects himself immediately. He has a reputation to uplift around the feminine crowd.

"He didn't say sorry," Carl says with conviction.

"Well, you hear the jury," Sasha says, and she rises to her height.

She goes to grab Shane, and she places him in front of the offended toddlers. RJ and Carl glared at him. _So much for being the favourite uncle._

"Look, it was an honest mistake. Rick is awesome. Please forgive me Rick's hive." Shane deadpans.

"Don't mess up my work. Give us a real apology." Sasha elbows Shane.

"I'm sorry for saying that Rick is mean. I didn't mean it." Shane corrects his previous apology.

"It's okay…" RJ wipes his remaining tears.

"Happy, "Shane turns toward Sasha. " Am I a redeemed man?" He teases.

"Hug it out then it's a sealed deal," Sasha says with a smile.

Shane kneels, and he opens his arm. He cannot explain tonight to his tired brain if he tried.

"Can you hug Uncle Shane?" He asks with small anxiety.

Although, it does not last long. RJ and Carl hug him, and he hardly wants to let them go. He can only blame his reaction to the lack of sleep. He is not some softhearted person having a strange bonding moment with his best friend hidden sons.

"Don't leave me out," Sasha says, and she joins the hug.

"Now that I have established peace, can I ask what is going on?" Sasha turns toward Shane.

….

….

….

"I'm Shane Walsh," He extends his hand for Sasha to take.

She looks at him with an air of wonder, and she shakes his hand.

"Yeah, I have a personal grudge with your person." Sasha smirks, "I'm Sasha Williams."

Shane laughs, and it might upgrade the horn at first sight to odd romantic interest. He is too exhausted for it to be happening.

"Let me guess, you have my secret children." Shane seriously inquires.

_No man-whore_ _is safe_. He thinks with conviction. If the best of them, Rick can be a victim, Shane does not think he survived it.

"Oh my god, He knows about the triplets." Sasha has a moment of confusion. "Carl?" She easily concludes.

"Triplet?" Shane asks. "These are twins."

Sasha laughs, and she thinks there is nothing else to do.

"Judith already went him with Beth." She replies.

She needs a minute to sit. She needs another minute to call Evelyn and Ryan. She believes Michonne's parents must know.

"He is indeed shouting," Shane sits by Sasha.

Sasha looks at Shane with concern. She stands from the spot, which she took on RJ's bed. Shane watches her leave the room.

"Where are you going?" Shane calls after Sasha.

"Find that idiot office, and I better not find him shouting on Michonne…" Sasha replies as she walks out of the room.

Shane runs after Sasha, and he grabs her by the waist. He lifts her above the floor. _This fucking night will never end. _He thinks with regrets.

"Slowdown miss," Shane says, and he does not return her to the floor. "I think they are having a private conversation."

"Private my ass. What happens if he is chocking her?" Sasha counters.

She is not making the same mistake, which she did with Mike. The scene after the birth was such a mess. The idiot would have killed her if she had not intervened.

"Then she is probably enjoying it because Rick is hitting it right." Shane jokes, "I said shouting, but he is not going to do anything crazy. He is probably having a panic attack. He has three children, and he had yet to finish his nightshift. The man has the right to be mad." Shane clarifies.

Sasha attempts to escape from Shane's arm. _I can't even enjoy his hold. _She laments. She would have paid his fees if he had waited to retire. However, she presently thinks of Michonne's well being.

"Can you put me down?" She ultimately asks when it is obvious that she won't escape his hold.

"Once, Michonne and Rick have cleared their situation." Shane replies, "And it is about now." He puts Sasha down when he sees Michonne returning toward them.

"Mimi…" Sasha runs to hug Michonne, "Are you okay?"

* * *

Michonne pulls her locks into a bun, and she watches her children sleep. Carl has refused to leave. At such an hour of the night, she does not see the point of dealing with a tantrum. Therefore, she accepted the defeat.

Michonne curls herself in the sofa while she waits for Sasha to come with the adequate conclusion for the matter ahead.

"Thank you… What was his facial expression?" Sasha presses Michonne for an answer.

They already made a pact not to discuss anything about Rick and the children until tomorrow. The night has already brought his drama. However, it feels as if Michonne would not know peace.

"Waiter unhappy with his tips kind of thank you has more emotions," Michonne explains.

She does not even know how to interpret such a level of apathy. Michonne looks at Sasha, and she knows how superficial she is now. However, any other thought might only make her panic.

"Hmmm…That is not…bad," Sasha attempts to lie.

Michonne glares at Sasha, and she covers her face with her hands.

"The best sex of my life is a one-sided experience. My kids are the product of bad sex. I'm the worst experience of his life," Michonne laments.

"He didn't say that," Sasha corrects Michonne, "You're being dramatic." She hugs Michonne's left side, and she carefully manages to have a spot on the bed.

"He said thank you …" Michonne laments.

Ultimately, the time has come. The tears begin to flow, and the futile conversations can no longer distract her. She looks at Sasha who has the tissue box in her hand.

"It was bad?" Sasha carefully asks.

Michonne wipes her eyes, and she needs a hold on her emotions. However, she can hardly tell what she feels. Between fear and relief, she has yet to decide.

"Could have been worse, and it might be horrible when we talk about it." Michonne draws a long soothing breath, "You know they are all in love with him. Carl, RJ, and Judith have fallen in that enchantment. "

Michonne stands and she begins to pace back and forth. She needs a way to allow the pressure to evaporate.

"He can't even remember how much children we have. He does not want children. I don't think I want a dad for my children…Sasha?" Michonne turns to look at her friend, which has a concerned expression.

Sasha passes a tissue to Michonne, and she waits for a second.

"You need to chill. You need many things, but I will stick with chilling. Can we take mommy and daddy issues out of the equation." Sasha orders more than she asks. "He does not want children too bad he has three. You don't want a dad for your children, oh well; your kids could care less for what you both want." Sasha finishes with an inarguable point.

Michonne wants to counter, and yet, she has to accept that she has only put forward issues concerning Rick and her.

"He wants in with them. The idiot wants to pay me to be part of the picture." Michonne sighs and she looks at Sasha for a grip of common sense.

"At least, he did deny being their father. I say we are above what you expected. "Sasha points out, "I mean give the man a break. Three children, I would dip before I offer money to get in the family." She laughs.

Michonne does not share the humour and her mind bugs at the word family. What happens if he wants her children to be his children? What will she do if he wants her out of the family?

"Barnes, stop overthinking. I can see you creating scenarios. What did he tell you about what he wants?" Michonne snaps her finger to draw Michonne's attention.

Michonne would lie if she offered a clear answer to Sasha's question. They did not have a conversation on the matter. He was panicking, and she was not in a better state either.

"I don't know," She admits with slight embarrassment.

"Beginning by finding it out what your baby daddy wants, and then we will hire lawyers if we must." Sasha reasonably says, "Until then sleep or masturbate. Whatever relaxes you the most?"

Michonne rolls her eyes, but she goes over to Sasha to hug her best friend. She lies her head over Sasha's shoulder.

"My vibrator no longer has a battery, and this is a hospital. Why do you suggest the impossible? "Michonne groans, and she returns to the sofa.

"I only care for your well being, Barnes." Sasha chuckles, and she stands to leave the room.

"Where are you going?" Michonne suspiciously asks.

She does not trust Sasha after finding her in Shane's arms.

"Home because we're long over visiting hours. I will see you later. I have been making my cab wait to deal with your crazy self. By the way, He said thank you because he is an idiot." Sasha replies, and she returns in the room to hug Michonne, "You can always ask him for a rematch."

"Go away, Williams."

* * *

Rick looks at his watch, and he only wants to return to RJ's room. He does not know why he wants to convinces himself to keep a certain distance.

"Half an hour to five in the morning. Oh Lord, freedom is coming." Shane says as he enters Rick's on-call room.

Shane looks at Rick, and it is evident that his best friend has begun to drown in angst. Shane sits, and he slides a coffee cup toward Rick.

"Thinking about doing the honourable thing." Shane teases, "I say God is looking out for you. From whatever you want to marry who you now have to marry, there is an upgrade."

"I'm not marrying anyone," Rick regrets dignifying Shane's statement.

"Still an upgrade," Shane laughs, and he drinks his coffee, "Can you stop brooding. It is not the end of the world. You have a village of children with a gorgeous woman. I have suffered the worst fate, and you have condemned yourself to live with Lori. I think you can manage. "

Rick looks at Shane, and he questions the purpose of their friendship.

"They are triplets, not an entire village. It's scary. Shane, do you know what it means. My entire life has to change to fit a child how about three." Rick has failed to answer that question.

"You can argue they aren't yours. You don't even remember banging their mother." Shane nonchalantly suggests.

Rick laughs, and not once, he has thought of denying that he is the father. He didn't need Michonne giving him a few seconds to accept that he was their father.

"Have you seen Carl? Do you think I want RJ beginning to cry because I'm an awful man? Judith is adorable, and I would be unable to deny her successfully. Shane, I'm asking for a possible course of action, not fantasy. "Rick chastises.

Shane stares at his friend, and he feels as if problems do solve themselves.

"Well, you made them fit in the statement to tell me how much you're their dad. Throw the same passion for being a father." Shane says with amusement.

Rick stands, and he begins to pace. He would want it to be as easy as Shane makes it sound.

"I don't want children," Rick says with less conviction.

"But you have children."

Shane sighs, and he moves up to the bed. He is more tired than he has ever been. He does not know why Rick is acting as if he indecisive about what to do. Rick has already accepted that he is a father. The real issue is how he works around it.

"She might not want me in the picture. I mean she does not want me around them." Rick ultimately allows his anxiety to the surface.

"You don't want children, and it does not matter because you have three of those. Michonne might not want you around, and guess what it is irrelevant. What both of you want is not going to outshine what those children deserve, and so I will give you a piece of fucking common sense advice."

Shane dramatically poses in the middle of his statement. He waits for suspense effect, and he does want Rick to understand the price of idiocy is an annoyance. Therefore, he purposely wastes a few second to annoy his best friend.

"What can both of you be adult and have a nice conversation on the matter of importance, your love children?" Shane deadpans.

"We will do that later tonight," Rick answers, and he sounds less stressed by the thought of talking to Michonne about how to proceed forward with their situation.

"Oh, you have a mommy and daddy date. Y'all are cute. Rhee is about to do all these nightshifts because Maggie wanted to trust your morality over a dick that has known the joy of Michonne. I mean her ass…"

Rick's fist hit Shane's shoulder, and it is sufficient to silence him.

"Can we establish rule here? Don't thirst on the mother of my children. "Rick rolls his eyes, and he picks the cup of coffee.

"Okay… we can no longer be out of pocket." Shane sighs, "by the way, let me be around when you babysit. I met the love of my life." Shane laughs.

"I don't want to know. I'm going on the round." Rick says, and Shane only nods, "by the way, I would have called at least one of my son Shane junior."

"Carl is such a ghost name. Love you, Richard." Shane yawns.

* * *

Jumping the room would be ridiculous for many reasons. The most important reason would be that Rick has wanted to return to RJ's room since he left. He carefully knocks, and he waits for the answer.

Rick checks his watch, and it is five in the morning. He assumes that they are asleep. He should come right when he finishes his shift. However, he has fought his need to see RJ and maybe Michonne too long.

He slowly pushes the door open not to disturb anyone, but Michonne is a light sleeper. Her brown orbs are immediately on Rick. He freezes at the sight of her. How did he forget her? He cannot fathom how traumatic it must have been for him to erase their encounter.

"Hello," She whispers with a raspy voice, and her fingers disappear in her bun to undo it.

The loose locks cascade on her shoulder and chest. Many other beautifully frame her face. Rick draws a deep breath in the hope that his sleepy and exhausted body does not overreact. He cannot stand another hard-on over Michonne. Life has become complicated to navigate. Rick did not sign for a trip to adolescence. He can control his body. He stares at Michonne with a certain fascination.

"You're staring." She points out.

He wonders if she has an idea of her nymph like ability. For once, the memory, which comes about Michonne, has nothing of very erotic. He thinks of how he felt when he opened the door, and Michonne was on the other side.

From her smile to her rambling, it felt magical and sensual. Rick draws a deep breath, and he scratches the back of the head.

"Hi, sorry for waking you up," Rick says.

Michonne smiles and Rick feels as if the night was not as horrid as he thought. He has three children with the most gorgeous woman on the earth.

"If you didn't do it, they would have," Michonne replies and she uncurls from the sofa. "Anything?"

Rick yawns, and he does not remember how to do his job. He leans on the wall, and he looks at Michonne while she fixes the blanket around her children…_our children_.

"Well, I had to be sure that he wasn't sick for the rest of the night." Rick ultimately replies.

Michonne picks toys from the floor, and she passes them to Rick. He goes with the flow, and they enter a dance where she leads and he follows.

"No fever, but your friend or Uncle Shane as they called him made cry." She says with a mischievous smile, "I had to explain that you would never shout at me…" She turns to look at him with almost a question in the insistence of her. "Not even tonight when we have an ugly conversation."

Michonne gives Rick the last toy on the floor. She stands impossibly close to him. It might be painfully close for a mind who has fantasized about her for days. She looks into his eyes for reassurance. The led light hits Michonne's irises, and it emphasises the ethereal quality of the brown of her eyes.

"I can't take tears, and so RJ wins you that immunity. How did Carl sleep?" Rick invisibly creates a gap between Michonne and him.

"Look," She points at the bed. "I think he does well as his brother blanket."

He looks at the boys, and it hits like a wall of bricks. He turns toward Michonne, and he does not know if he will wait until tonight to talk.

Michonne stands in front of Rick, and she frames his face. It's odd to feel as if her touch as magical power. His skin tingles, and it does not feel as farfetched that she so easily destroyed his ego.

"Can't be that much to wait tonight?" She whispers.

How is he supposed to have the upper hand? _Use the upper brain._ Rick shouts at himself to wake up from the enchantment. Michonne's thumb draws his jaws. Rick magnetically draws close to her, and he tilts his head. _Don't complicate everything. How more complicated can things get? Oh, let see, turn the mother of your children into a mistress. _Rick's common sense is attempting to pull the breaks on his desire.

Rick leans close enough to have his breath caress her skin. She does not move nor does she acts as if she cares to stop. Michonne appears to be in the same trance as Rick. Her comforting touch has turned into a sensual caress. His lips brush her, and Rick draws a shallow breath. What happens if the reality is mediocre compared to the fantasy? Rick has no time to ponder on the question nor does he have the opportunity to have the answer.

"Eww …" it comes from below them.

Michonne and Rick look down, and a pair of blue eyes stare at them.

"RJ licked me, mama." Carl shows his cheek covered with what is his drooling. "Mama, I'm going to die. He made me disgusting. "

Rick drops on his knee, and he looks at Carl's face carefully. He searches his pocket for a tissue, and he wipes the drooling.

"Here, you will survive." He announces with a smile.

"Hello, Doctor Richard. " Carl politely says, "Thank you."

Michonne looks at her son and Rick. She wonders what magical power he has for having all her children enamoured with him.

"Hello, Carl. Did you sleep well?" Rick replies, and he picks Carl from the floor.

"The bed is small. Mama didn't fit." Carl answers in the way, which pleases him.

"Don't worry; RJ is going home this morning. I'm sure mama fit in the bed at home." Rick pokes Carl's chubby cheeks, and Carl laughs.

He begins to babble, and Michonne stares in awe as her timid son turns into a radio. She does not understand half of what Carl is saying, but father and son appear to have the conversation of the century. She watches for as long as she doesn't feel as if she steals from the moment. Michonne never finds that awkward moment, and so she watches them until Rick's pager ring.

"Well, my shift is over…" Rick sighs with content. "I have to fill RJ's discharge paper." He carefully puts Carl down.

Rick leaves the room, but he feels compelled to return. He kneels to hug Carl, and he goes to kiss RJ's forehead. Michonne watches him, and she thinks that Sasha has her odd form of wisdom.

Rick surprises Michonne when he leans toward her to whisper in her ear. His breath warms her neck. He smells of coffee.

"If you care to know, the sex was the best in my life." Rick leaves with an amused glance at a blushing Michonne.

Michonne stares at an empty spot for a second, and she does not know how to react. He reminds her of the man who opened the door, and she immediately fell into his enchantment.

"That is how he got me pregnant. Cockiness and charm. My dumbass should have left, but no I had to fall for hello." Michonne mumbles and she groans at the sight of Carl staring at her with the exact eyes of Rick Grimes, "nine-month and none of you wanted to look like your mama."

_Your father is going to drive me insane, and I shouldn't like the thought of it. _


	6. Chapter 6

**I don't own the walking dead**

**thanks for the reviews, and your patience for some of you.**

**please review**

* * *

**Chapter V**

* * *

At the sight of her, Rick breathes deeply. He wants nothing more than to sleep. Later, he will focus on the turn, which his life took after last night. Rick heads to their room. She immediately follows him.

"Not now, Lori." Rick laments.

He drags his shirt over his head, and he feels Lori's stare burning the back of his head. He makes a conscious effort to ignore her. She grows frustrated with the passing seconds.

"When?" She begins to yell, "It's never the right time with you." Lori insists.

Rick stops undressing, and he turns to face her. She exhausts him beyond what he can endure. How many arguments can they have on the same topic?

"Do you ever tire?" Rick asks with irritation, "Because I'm tired of this." Rick's forefinger repeatedly travels from him to her. "I'm coming out of a twenty-four hours shift, and you want to argue. Do we do anything else?"

Rick stares at Lori. Last night changed his perspective on his life. His relationship with Lori appears depthless. Does he want to get married when everything is happening in his life? Rick has new doubts creeping in his mind.

"We argue because of you," Lori points out with frustration. "You're the problem," she doubles down with the accusations. "You're nothing but a selfish man. It's your little job with those useless kids. It is everything but me."

Rick pauses, and he lacks an immediate reply. Their arguments often end with Lori's successful attempt to guilt him over everything.

"Useless kids?"

Rick cannot believe his ears. He stares at Lori with disdain for what she said. _My son is one of those 'useless kids'_. His thoughts are grounding. She always refers to his patients with the oddest term, and yet, it never sunk how bad it was until he is the father of one of the kids.

"They are sick kids, Lori." Rick shares his frustrations, "They are amazing and strong kids. What is wrong with you?" He grows angry.

"Here you go," She sighs, "making me pass for a monster because I could care less for what you do. Oh, I'm the devil because I want my fiancé to care for me. I'm the shameless one because I don't care for some sick child. It's your job. None of these children is yours. They pay you to care for them just as they paid you to fuck any old woman having enough money. So please, spare me the false concern." Lori pursues with a complete lack of remorse.

Rick could care less about correcting Lori. One of those children is his son. He adores his patients. Rick pinches his nose. It does not differ from their previous arguments, but Rick has a different perspective. His life has abruptly taken a turn for extremely complicated.

"You're right," Rick says, "I'm the problem." He repeats.

It sounds like the end of their argument to Lori.

"I put up with all the crazy things you say because I don't care to argue. I care about my job. I care about those children. You and me, I could do without it. I could do without the reminder that I was a gigolo during every argument. I can do without the pointless arguments." He adds without hesitation.

Lori looks at Rick, and his reply stuns her. She does not have an immediate counter-argument. Rick continues to speak his mind.

"You don't like my job. Do you want me to choose between my job and you? "

Lori stares at him, and Rick considers her silence as an answer.

"I will gladly do without you and your fuckery." Rick deadpans.

"Rick?" Lori confusedly attempts to understand.

"There, you have it." Rick retorts, "I'm going to crash at Shane's place until I can find a new apartment."

Rick puts back his shirt, and he grabs his duffle bag. He begins to pull clothes from his closet and fills his bag.

"What are you doing?"

Lori grabs his arm, and Rick pulls away from her. Rick closes his bag, and he stops at the door.

"I'm breaking our engagement, and you can keep the ring." Rick announces, "You're unhappy. I'm not going to change my plans and uproot my life for you."

Rick walks away, and Lori has yet to recover from the unexpected turn of events. She runs after Rick when she breaks out of her stupor, though he has already left.

* * *

Michonne is watching her sanity slip away from her mind. An hour away from meeting Rick Grimes, she would like a minute to think. Tree kids remove the luxury of peace, but the biggest problem, which she has to face, is an insane mother and an equally wild best friend.

"Can you try to look your best? He is a gorgeous man, and women must be throwing themselves at him." Evelyn says while she looks at Michonne's clothes with disdain.

"Mama," Michonne groans.

She does not want to hear any comments about wooing Rick Grimes. Michonne walks in front of the mirror. _She is right. I look like I would ask him about his insurance company and propose him a better plan. _Michonne hides her thoughts with a smile. She dislikes her attire as much as her mother does. She does not want to send mixed signals to Rick.

"It's not a date," Michonne retorts.

She feels the need to reassure herself as well as the necessity to dismiss her mother.

"Oh, the lies we tell ourselves," Sasha intervenes," You know it's a date."

Michonne rolls her eyes, but she grudgingly walks to her wardrobe. Her actual outfit is suitable for a parent-teacher day. She looks like an overworked teacher in her sixty. After a glance at her, Rick will understand how serious she is.

_You want him to understand how open to a good fuck you're_. Michonne shakes her head, and she decides to shove her thoughts deeper down.

"We're going to talk about the children." Michonne laments. "When do you think we will have time to flirt?"

"When you talk about the benefits of two parents households." Evelyn deadpans.

Sasha laughs, and Michonne wants to bury herself under layers of blankets.

"I'm not going," Michonne groans, and she goes to lie on her bed.

Evelyn comes to lie by Michonne, and she wraps her limbs around her daughter like a blanket. Michonne draws a deep breath.

"It's overwhelming." She admits, "I always thought I would find him. Now, I don't know how to react."

"Maybe going to that non-date is a good place to begin. You can at least have a mature talk, and you must do it while looking gorgeous." Evelyn replies, and she kisses Michonne's forehead.

"Mama," Michonne sighs, "I'm not trying to get laid. This is serious. we have to talk about the children. I could go there in pyjama, and it wouldn't matter." She adds with slight annoyance.

"Have some self-respect, Michonne," Sasha shouts from Michonne's closet, "You are going there to talk children, but in the second important matter, you're going there to make him feel dumb for forgetting about you." She comes out of Michonne's closet with two dresses hanging on her arm.

"Can you both stop? It's a complicated situation." Michonne retorts, "A beautiful dress won't solve this."

"You're overthinking it all," Evelyn points out, "You should go there with an open mind."

Michonne stands from the bed, and she looks at the dress on Sasha's arms.

"What are the options?" She begrudgingly asks.

Sasha smiles, and she lifts the hangers. Michonne stares at the two dresses. She wonders how her best-friend mind works.

"Before you speak, listen to me." Sasha rushes to explain, "the ivory silk dress sends a clear message," she adds as she moves forward the dress.

"Which is?"

Michonne rolls her eyes. _Why am I listening to this?_ She thinks with exhaustion. Sasha carefully places the dress on the bed.

"You had an amicable divorce, and you're willing to grow mutually and co-parent. On incidents, you can amicably take the dick." Sasha continues with seriousness, which almost takes away the insanity of what she says.

Michonne stares at her friend. She shakes her head as a sign of frustration. How many times does she have to repeat that it is for her children? She does not have any sexual interest toward Rick Grimes. _A little bit. Depending on the day a lot. If once again he does that magic thing where he is a natural at fatherhood, every day the way he likes it. _Michonne's thoughts betray her. She draws a deep breath, and she pretends not to think of Rick.

"I know you're a sex therapist, but it doesn't always have to be about sex," Michonne argues.

"What do you think got you pregnant?" Evelyn adds her two cents, "In this situation, it's relevant."

"Thank you, Aunty Evelyn." Sasha smiles, and she lifts the second hanger to display the dress. "Now onto the red velvet dress, still divorced but ugly divorce. You kind of hate him, but you still have angry sex."

"We're losing the meaning of tonight." She argues as she takes one of the hangers from Sasha's hand.

Michonne picks the white dress, and Evelyn nods in the agreement of her choice.

"Carl, Judith, and RJ's happiness," Evelyn immediately responds, "No one is forgetting what matters, and you should remember too." She takes a motherly tone, which calms Michonne.

"Be open about the situation," Sasha rebounds on what Evelyn said, "Don't go there and pull a Michonne."

Michonne glares at Sasha. She sits before her vanity. Judith walks in the room, and she heads toward her mother. Sasha pulls Michonne's locks into a high ponytail.

"What do you mean by pulling a Michonne?" She asks with an offended tone.

"Don't be a professional lawyer trying to counter interrogate the poor man." Evelyn clarifies. "You're going to chew and spit him out if you feel wary."

"Amen," Sasha firmly agrees. "Let him talk even if you don't like all of what you hear. Keep an open mind. We are solving issues, not creating new ones."

"We are solving issues," Judith repeats. She reaches for her mother. "Issues...Issues." She tries to pronounce the word as perfectly as she can.

Michonne puts her daughter on her lap while she carefully applies a light layer of makeup. She would not admit it, but Sasha and Evelyn got into her head with all their comments.

"Listen to the young one." Evelyn confirms, "Don't chew and spit that poor man." She repeats.

"Mama," Michonne groans, and Judith laughs at the sound. "Baby, no..." She softly says when Judith attempts to stand on her lap with dirty bare feet. "Don't ruin mommy's dress."

"Okay," Judith pouts, and she rests her head on Michonne's chest. "Where are you going, mama?"

_Oh no_. Michonne looks at her daughter. She senses the catastrophe. _She is doing it. Fuck, it is a date_. She officially admits when her daughter is beginning her cockblocking work.

"And so it begins," Sasha voices Michonne's thoughts.

Michonne glares at Sasha. She does not want to hear it. Sasha's grin is worse than an actual I told you so.

"It's officially a date," Evelyn says in a manner, which Michonne calls her righteous tone.

"Mommy is going to spend time with a friend," Michonne replies to her daughter.

In response, Judith wraps her arms around Michonne's waist. Michonne sighs, and she looks at her watch. She has an hour left before the non-date date. She stands and places Judith on her hips.

"I will be back very soon," She gently tells her daughter.

Judith looks at Michonne. There are a few seconds of calm, and then the tears fall. Michonne rocks Judith, but it seems pointless. She looks at the clock, and she has to leave in the next five minutes.

"This is your fault," Michonne tells Evelyn and Sasha. "It's not a date."

* * *

One look at the restaurant, which Rick picked, Michonne admits she was wrong. She looks at her dress, and she silently thanks Sasha and her mother. _It is a fucking date, and he did not bother telling me. _She bitterly thinks. Why would he pick an expensive restaurant with an amazing sommelier? The soft lights scream romantic atmosphere. Michonne's heart threatens to leap out of her chest.

Michonne looks at her watch, and she is ten minutes early. She does not expect Rick Grimes to be punctual. As the minutes pass, she is vindicated. Michonne has never met a man with so much chaotic energy.

Michonne sighs, and she swears by the fact that she would leave in five minutes. After fifteen minutes of Rick being late, she decides to quit and return home.

However, a few seconds later, Rick is jogging toward the table, which he booked. Michonne stands by the table. She is uncertain of her next move. She freezes on her spot.

"Doctor Richard," Judith releases Michonne's hand.

Stunned, Rick catches the leaping little girl. He curiously looks at her. There are none of his children, who do not borrow from his look.

"Hello, Judith." Rick gently says, and he sits Judith on his hips. "I'm glad to see you." He adds while he heads toward Michonne, who remained by the reserved table.

"Mommy has a date," Judith pouts.

"Oh!"

Rick cocks his eyebrow in a question. He looks too stunned by Judith's comment. It is not a date.

_Kill me now. _Michonne wants the floor to open and swallow her.

"Judith, please." Michonne mumbles.

She timidly approaches the duo, and she extends her arms to pick Judith, who snobs her. _Nine months, and he requires five seconds to win them all._ Michonne bitterly thinks.

"That's okay. I can keep her." Rick's delivery is not perfect, but Michonne understands what he means.

His smile soothes the burn of Judith's rejection. Michonne nods, and she stiffly stands.

"I'm sorry for being late to our date," Rick emphasises the word date.

From his casual look, Michonne deduces that it is not a date. Now, she regrets listening to Sasha and her mother.

"Almost fifteen minutes," Michonne points out.

"As you can see from my clothes, I had an emergency. I had to return to the hospital on my day off, and I only left now. Well, I had to switch hours to get here." Rick explains as he draws Michonne's chair. "There goes my Friday night." He laments.

"Oh, I'm sorry." She replies, "a call to cancel would have saved you the trouble." Michonne sincerely adds, "If I had a work emergency, I would do the same."

"Carl, Judith, and RJ are a priority," Rick replies without hesitation. "For once, work can take the backseat."

He only notices the meaning of what he has said when Michonne stares at him.

"They are a priority," He repeats to come to terms with what he said, "Tonight is important to me."

"Okay," Michonne is uncertain on how to proceed.

She prepared for the worst scenario. Now, she faces a willing Rick, and he throws her out of the loop.

The waiter, fortunately, interrupts their conversation. She uses the time to centre her thoughts. _What now? _Michonne cannot think beyond that question.

* * *

The silence stretches between Rick and Michonne while Judith is singing a revised version of a pop song, which Michonne might recognise if she could focus on anything but Rick.

"Is she always like this?" Rick asks Michonne, and he looks at Judith who gleefully dances on his lap.

Michonne smiles, and she has not seen Judith so full of energy around anyone, who is not her family.

"She is the only girl between two boys, and most times, she has to be the loudest to get their attention." Michonne explains, "I can take her if you want."

Rick looks at his daughter, and he smiles.

"I don't mind, but if I could understand her song, I would feel better," He replies.

Rick attempts to recognise the song.

He eventually gives up when he notices the lyrics are endless gibberish. He raises his head to look at Michonne. He swallows to help with his dry mouth. _A date?_ Rick feels slightly anxious. _Focus, Rick. _He tells himself to stop staring at Michonne. She looks gorgeous, and he does not know how well he will do if he focuses more on how beautiful she is. Rick clears his throat.

"Three children," He cannot wrap his mind on that fact. "Not one, not two, but three five years old."

_Father of three_. He thinks with an odd feeling of calm. He is slowly making peace with that aspect of the situation. Perhaps, it is a small enchantment. He has an adorable little girl. He looks at Judith, and he feels oddly gratified with his life now.

"It took me days to recover from the news that I was pregnant," Michonne says in an attempt to comfort Rick. "It took me longer to recover when I learned they were triplets." She chuckles.

Her laughs begin to break the ice. Michonne reaches for her wine, and she sips some of the liquor for warmth and comfort. Judith sings less, and she begins to yawn. Her small fist closes around Rick's shirt.

"I can only imagine," Rick replies with a small smile. "Hard news to face alone." He continues with slight gaucherie.

There is an ounce of bitterness, and Michonne picks upon it. She does not comment because the waiter returns with their dishes.

"I think you might need my help now," Michonne tells Rick when the waiter puts Judith's food on the table, "It is going to get messy, and she is going to throw a tantrum." She reaches for her daughter.

"And allow carbonara to ruin your beautiful dress," Rick kindly refuses to take Michonne's help, "I will take the risk with my old jeans. Don't worry I can feed her." He confidently adds.

Michonne wants to argue. Perhaps, it does not sit well with her how Rick effortlessly bonds with her children. _His children too_. She forcefully reminds herself.

"Judith," Rick calls Judith, who has exhausted herself with a half-hour long pop concert. "I will need your help just like the other day in the hospital," he continues with a seriousness, which gives his words a sense of solemnity. "Can you do that, sweetheart?"

Judith eagerly nods, and Rick kisses the crown of her head. Michonne only stares at the duo. She wonders how Rick is so at ease with her children. It took her a few months to get a grip at parenthood.

"Your mommy does not think we can eat like grown-ups," Rick looks at Michonne with a small smirk, "Now, I know it is not true. I'm a grown-up, and you're my assistant grown up." He tells Judith. "Are you going to help me and eat your food like a grown-up?"

Judith nods, and she straightens herself. Rick gives her a fork, and Judith carefully eats her pasta. She does her best to keep every spaghetti in the plate. She is notably successful, and she eats without throwing a tantrum.

"That's…" Michonne does not know how to react. "It is not always that simple." She grudgingly adds.

_Ungrateful children! Not only you take his face, and you make him the most efficient parent._ Michonne internally rolls her eyes. She cannot find an explanation for her children's innate favouritism.

"When you have some experiences convincing children to take pills, everything else is easier in comparison," Rick clarifies.

_I had to have children with a paediatrician._ Michonne internally laments. She does know if she wants him to be a dependable option for her children or if she wants to be bad at fatherhood and so she will not regret his absence.

"Where were you all those years?"

She meant it as a joke, but bitterness flows from Michonne's words. The delicate situation becomes painfully uncomfortable. They share a heavy look. Michonne genuinely cares to know.

"I would have been right by your side if I knew."

Rick inhales, and he believes each word, which he says. He has thought about the situation. "I didn't know." He repeats with small irritation.

"Yeah…" Michonne sounds sceptical of his first claim.

Rick stares at Michonne. There is no way to avoid a complicated conversation. They can barely talk about the weather. Rick and Judith's interaction make Michonne uncomfortable. There are no chances for a smooth process. Rick gives up all pretences. The gloves come off on both sides.

"You know I'm not a deadbeat out of my will," Rick tells Michonne with an exasperated tone, "It has a lot to do with you keeping it a secret." He clarifies.

Michonne hesitates a second. She has not been cooperative. She did not expect the harshness of Rick's words. She takes a big gulp of her wine to calm her nerves, and Rick empties his glass.

"I didn't plan to go through a pregnancy, and I certainly did not expect to raise them alone." Michonne retorts, and she does not hide her grief.

"Why didn't you tell me? If you could join me to fuck you, you could do it to inform me that I got you pregnant." Rick says with a rising tone.

"Trouble," Judith says with a concerned voice, "Don't shout. That's mean, doctor Richard." She chastised Rick.

"I'm sorry," Rick tells Judith, and he hardly survives the mortification of having his five years old reminding him to be civil in a tense situation. "I'm sorry for raising my voice. We can talk through this like adults." He looks into Michonne's eyes.

Judith looks up at the adults. They immediately decide to remain civil. Michonne sighs, and she nods in agreement.

"Mommy," Judith says to her mother with a tone, which she borrowed straight out of Michonne's book. "Your turn."

_I should have left her home_. Michonne stares at her daughter who wants to mediate her parents' issues the same way Michonne solves her children's fights.

"I'm sorry."

Michonne softly says. She will not survive the night if every word leads to an argument.

"I did not think you were the father," Michonne honestly replies, "We used protection. For nine months, I thought their father was Mike. "

"Mike,"

"Not relevant to the story unless you want to hear how my love life was going at the time. Spoiler, it was trash enough. I had to pay for my first orgasm. By the way, thank you for that." Michonne deadpans.

"That was what I was," Rick says with a sombre tone, "Some sexual experience."

Michonne blinks, and she does not know what he wants to hear now. She decides to disregard his comment.

"I found out you were the father because I had two kids with blonde hair and blue eyes, and all three favoured you. It was nine months too late, and you were off that damn website."

"Carl is brunette." Rick corrects Michonne.

"It was not always that way. For two years, I had two Viking looking kids." She rolls her eyes at his audacious attempt to remind her of their son's hair colour.

"I get it," Rick sighs," You couldn't find me, but when you did, you still didn't tell me."

She looks at him as if he has lost his mind. Did he forget the condition of their encounter?

"You don't want to be a dad," Michonne calmly states, "Why does it matter if you didn't know anyway?" She sounds disingenuous.

Rick scratches his head. He thinks of the answer to that question.

"Because even if I did not want them, I have children. Do I want children? Certainly, no. Do I have children? Three children, two boys and a girl. Carl, Judith, and RJ. That reason alone matters, and there is so much more." He refrains from pointing out that RJ is sick, and he would not take the risk not to know his son.

"You didn't remember me," even with her best effort to hide her emotions, Michonne sounds hurt. "Where did you want me to begin when you could not remember being intimate with me." She asks Rick. "You entered that room, and I was no one to you. Not even a woman in many of your conquests, I was not a memory. I was someone you forgot. Where do I find the bravado to tell you anything?"

Her words hit him like a ton of bricks. Rick is embarrassed. He scratches his head, and he sighs. He will not be able to offer the answer, which Michonne deserves.

"I get it," His tone softens, and he does not want to deal with her hurt when he did not intend to create it. "It does not matter than I didn't know earlier. I would have prefered to help you through everything. I would have appreciated the opportunity to do the right thing."

"The right thing," Michonne bitterly chuckles.

"Yeah...the right thing." Rick remains rooted in his position. "If you told me, you were expecting my children. I would have certainly reworked around my life plan. I would have found a less demanding career. I would have asked you to marry me. I would have tried to build a structure for them." He clarifies. "I would be a radiologist and work from home. I don't know anything like that." Rick insists.

"Did you ever want to be a radiologist?" Michonne asks.

"No," Rick replies.

"I don't think to make yourself unhappy would have solved anything." Michonne counters, "I gave up just enough not to resent them for being my children." She explains. "If it sounds like a burden to you, I don't want you taking on a role, which you think is your duty. I felt relieved when I learned Mike was not the father. I knew my children would not have to deal with a man who not so secretly regretted their existence." Michonne looks into Rick's eyes. She wants him to understand.

Rick looks down on his lap. Judith has long finished eating. Despite his best effort, there is carbonara on his shirt because she slept in the middle of her meal. Her greasy mouth rests against the fabric of his shirt.

"I can't lie." Rick softly says, "I don't feel as ready as I should be a father as good as they deserve. I hardly feel like a father. Nothing sunk in since last night. I haven't processed anything." He confesses.

"I think it solves the issue." Michonne drinks the last sip of her wine.

"It puts the situation in perspective." Rick rebounds on what Michonne says. "It makes me think I'm crazy because I want a space in their lives. Enough space to grow into their father. Enough time so you do not try to snatch my daughter from my arms because you don't trust me. I'm not angry because I discovered I have children. I'm out of the loop. I don't resent them. I'm mad at you for not telling me, and I'm frustrated because it is a matter of circumstance if I don't know. I don't know what I want to say. I guess it is that I want to be their father. I want to love them, and I'm on the right path with that." He states with determination.

"Can we work it out like their parents?"

Michonne blinks away the tears. She had prepared for disappointment. She only expected Rick to ask no part of raising her children. Now, she is a walking contradiction. She wants to believe his words. She needs to be selfless for their children. However, Michonne cannot make the wrong choice. If she lets him in her family, she takes the risk to see her children hurt. She wants Rick, but she also needs to be able to reject him._ Not want in anyways beyond parenting. _She immediately clarifies her thoughts.

"I'm not the villain." She whispers, and yet she feels like the worst person in the universe.

"I know," Rick reaches for Michonne's hand, and she does not reject his comforting touch. She welcomes it and subconsciously intertwines their fingers. "You're rightfully being a mommy bear."

"You can hurt them," Michonne tells Rick, "Then it is going to be impossible to fix the situation. How do I know you won't bail out when they are hopelessly in love with their dad?"

Rick thinks of an adequate answer. He smiles when it becomes clear why he would not completely fail as a father.

"I don't think a minute you would allow me to ruin their lives. You're the only guarantee I can offer." He genuinely answers.

Michonne cannot argue. The time is inappropriate for her lines of thoughts. She deeply breathes.

"We can try a step at the time." She agrees, "No big reveal that you're their father until you fit well in the role." Michonne states.

"I will take anything," Rick replies.

For a minute, they share silence. Judith has formed a little ball on Rick's lap. Rick's hand still covers Michonne's one.

"I have answered all your questions," Michonne asks Rick, and he nods, "Do you mind answer one of mine?"

"Ask away?" He smirks.

"Why did you not remember me?"


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks for the reviews**

**I don't own the walking dead.**

**PS****: to the guests commenting update soon under some of my other richonne fics, please refrain because that fic would be deleted like long and lost. I will update when I'm done writing a the arrangement and this fic. If you want to know about update I have a Tumblr. **

**thanks to everyone who patiently waits for the update or ask about update on Tumblr.**

**AN: este capitulo es para ti querida idontsleep22, **

**please, reviews**

* * *

**Chapter VI**

* * *

"Shane," Rick expresses his frustration, "It was three days ago, let it go."

Rick empties his coffee cup, and he wolfs down his sandwich. He looks at his watch, and he has enough time to rest. His break ends in ten minutes.

"Let go of what?"

Maggie slides her plater on the table, and she comes to sit at her designated place.

"hi, Greene." Shane greets Maggie, "by the way you lost our little bet. Tells Rhee to get ready for Monday." He finishes with a broad smile.

"Fucking Rick," She slams her fist in Rick's arm. "You could not keep it in your pants. When did it happen?" She curiously asks while she glares at Shane.

Rick rubs his arm. He draws a deep breath. He knows he has to tell everything to his second best-friend, but he is unable to cope with the complicated mess around him.

"Six years ago," Rick groans.

_Here, we go. _ Rick mentally prepared himself for the questions. He begins to pick French fries out Maggie's plate, and she immediately slaps his hand away.

"Six years ago," She repeats.

Her eyes continue to dig a hole into Shane's face.

"Fuck you, Walsh. Of course, you knew. You knew…" Maggie stops before ending her sentence.

Her eyes open big like a saucer. She takes a minute to realise.

"No, Michonne Barnes is too pretty." Maggie dismisses the thought. "I'm straight like an I, but when I met her, I…" She stops to look at Shane's shit grin. "Don't let that thought cross your mind, Walsh." She firmly said.

"If they weren't restrictions on how we refer to sexy Michonne, I would agree that I want to F. U. C. K her for reasonable scientific research." Shane chuckles.

"Shane," Rick grunts. "Can you not go there? That is my…"

_Woman, _Rick shoves the thought away.

"She is off-limits," Rick firmly says. "Even on the fantasy level, forget about it." He repeats.

"I wouldn't do you dirty like that." Shane raises his hand in surrender. "I wouldn't do you like that for three reasons. She does not want me because she is busy running after your dick. You're busy running after her pussy. I'm dedicated to tasting her friend's pussy." He adds intending to annoy Rick.

"You ain't shit," Rick retorts. "Can you let it go?"

"Hold up," Maggie rejoins the conversation. "Walk me through this. I smell shit coming from Walsh, but not an everyday type of shit."

"Point your nose toward Grimes," Shane counters. "When you take five days off, the entire world changes his order of rotation, Greene." He smirks while he pointedly looks at Rick.

_Oh god,_ Rick refrains from showing the exhaustion of his mind.

"You missed me, Walsh." Maggie teases her best friend.

"You know it, Maggie pie" Shane replies. "Stop dying internally, Rick." He knowingly adds." Tell Maggie why she shouldn't take days off."

_Here we go…_ Rick draws a deep breath.

* * *

"Three children." Maggie hesitantly repeats. "You can't be serious."

She looks at her friends and waits for the laugh.

Shane finishes his sandwich.

Rick keeps his exhausted air.

"Carl, Judith, and RJ…" Rick repeats for the third time, "Enjoying your new aunty status?" He cocks an eyebrow.

_You would think she learned about her three secret children_… Maggie's shock amuses Rick. She is reacting worse than he did.

"You got a test, or you're running with her story because your dick likes her," Maggie argues.

She looks at Rick as if he is speaking gibberish on influence.

"Of course, you didn't." She replies to herself. "You slept with hundreds of women, and you believe the one who you can't remember." She is angry on behalf of Rick. "You can be so naive, Grimes."

"I don't remember any of them. Beside…"

Maggie interrupts Rick before he further explains the situation.

"And you," She turns toward Shane, "You should keep him from being a gullible fool. You can put it in his head that she could have any reason to lie. This idiot is a department chief." Maggie pursues. " From a leech to a scammer, you can't pick the right woman." Maggie rants.

"Shut up, Greene," Rick says forcefully. "Michonne is a good woman." He said with a tone stopping an argument. "I would do a DNA test if I need one. Did you meet any of the Barnes kids? Did Beth show you a picture of either of the children?"

Maggie stops, and Rick's sudden change of demeanour distracts her. She notices that he does not defend Lori for the same insult. _Worse than I thought. This idiot falls for any sob story. _Maggie regretfully thinks.

"Why would looking at the Barnes children do?" She retorts.

"First, you would not sound like a fool," Shane drags his phone out of his pocket. "Two, Rick would not want to shoot you for talking shit about his girl and their children." He continues while he passes the phone to Maggie. "As you said, I would let anyone play him."

Maggie stares at the picture on Shane's phone. She loses her voice for a second.

"Fuck," She says after a long minute scrolling down Michonne's Instagram page. "Oh fuck…" She raises her head to look at Rick. "Three children."

"Carl, Judith, and RJ," Rick and Shane say simultaneously.

"Scratch it all," Maggie corrects herself. "You used her womb like a premium photocopy." She continues to scroll until the last picture to confirm what she sees. "You have children, Grimes."

"Yeah," Rick replies with a softer tone, "I have three adorable children."

"It's almost weird how collected you're." Maggie compares with her reaction.

"Michonne," Rick hesitates.

_She is amazing. _

_I sound like an idiot in love. _

_The idiot part is the keyword. _He regretfully thinks.

"She walked me through the crazy reaction part." He settles for a version of the truth. "I have partially processed it. I have the number of children down." Rick sincerely says.

"He does not have anything else under control." Shane supplies.

"It was three days ago," Rick grunts.

"Wait there is more," Maggie anxiously asks.

"Rick pulled a Rick Grimes classic," Shane replies with a teasing tone.

"This is where Lori fits in," Maggie reluctantly says.

"You only missed five days," Shane feels as if he has lived a lifetime during those days. "Rick. as you already know, finds his baby mama attractive." He pursues, "It turns out that he is closer to being in love with her. He pulled a Grimes special."

"You stammered," Maggie replies while bouncing from Shane's hints. "You didn't stutter since we were twelve."

"Seventeen," Rick corrects. "But how else could I react to that question?"

"Certainly not laughing at her face while you take an eternity to say I don't know. Bad memory, I guess." Shane paraphrases Rick. "Bad memory, I guess."

"I panicked," Rick admits.

He did not expect the question to be so simple and blunt.

"What was I supposed to say at that instant?"

_Everything but I don't know. Bad memory_, Rick chastises himself. He has done nothing else the last few days. He miraculously remains sane while replaying the memory of that embarrassing moment. _I fucking laughed. Worse, I cackled. _He sighs, and his head sinks on the table.

"The truth and anything getting you closer to her pants." Shane deadpans. "It's not that hard."

"Let me get this straight," Maggie intervenes. "She asked you why you cannot remember her, and your natural answer was to laugh."

"Stutters," Rick corrects. "I couldn't form a sentence." He offers an excuse. "The entire date, I could not focus beyond,"

Rick scratches his head. _When did I become such a horny dude?_

He cannot think about that date without a series of explicit thoughts.

In Judith's presence, it was simple to forget that he has a Texas-size crush for the mother of his child. Now, days later, he continues to indulge in sexual thought about Michonne.

"You have a fiancé, Rick." Maggie reminds him. "I don't like her, but you're engaged."

"Not anymore," Shane and Rick counters.

Maggie gasps, but Rick and Shane immediately dismiss the option to discuss the why and how.

"I could focus on what to do about the children," Rick explains. "I also thought of what to do with her." He confesses. "Michonne is...it's complicated. I didn't expect her question."

"You fuck it up," Maggie says with brutal honesty. "In her place, I would hate you more than I already did for forgetting me."

"Thank you, Maggie." Rich exhaustively replies. "I needed to hear that the mother of my children hates me." He glances at his watch and stands to leave.

"You outdid yourself, Greene," Shane says when Rick rushes out of the hospital mess.

"Someone has to put the facts before him. You wouldn't immediately roll with anyone telling you about children who you may have fathered." Maggie argues.

"I wouldn't, and I'm dumber than Grimes is." Shane points out. "He trusts her, and he is right if they are going to raise children together."

"You said it, and I saw it myself. He is thinking with his dick too. He broke up with Lori out of nowhere. He stutters while talking to her. She has him whipped. I'm looking out for Rick." Maggie argues. "They have three children. Rick loves children, but he never wanted any."

Shane laughs. He empties his bottle of water.

"He didn't want any with Lori or the next woman. It is not the same thing."

Shane leaves the table. He knows Rick better than anyone does. Rick Grimes is oddly content with his newfound paternity. He might take time to understand the gravity of the situation, but he always loved fatherhood. He never wanted to be a father because he didn't trust himself to start that journey with the wrong partner.

"And Michonne Barnes is not the next woman?" Maggie counters.

"Ask Rick. He knows the answer better than anyone does." Shane shrugs.

"He couldn't remember her." Maggie insists as she joins Shane.

"This is not helping the point, which you think you made."

* * *

Rick can officially deem himself obsessed with Michonne. He wakes up at the ringtone of his phone.

He does not know if he should appreciate the interruption of his dream or if he should regret waking up in an empty bed.

His cock is painstakingly hard and ready to finish what he began to do in his dream.

Rick groans with frustration. He cannot move as freely as he wants with erect manhood. He twists to roll on his side. He reaches for the switch and Shane's guest room baths in light.

He absentmindedly reaches from his phone. With closed eyes, he unlocks the phone.

"Rick Grimes," He casually replies.

There are a few minutes of hesitation, which makes Rick wonder if he should hang up. He adjusts himself in his boxer.

"Hello," her voice comes out as an enticing whisper.

"Fuck," He softly moans the word.

_Why does my life have to be this endless disorder?_ He thinks with utter disbelief.

"Oh," She sighs with a certain softness. "I didn't mean to arouse you…" she does not know how to pursue her sentence

_Arouse, I was. I've been in a perpetual state since I met you._ He thinks with pity for his condition.

Rick's hand runs along his clothed length.

He bites his bottom lip.

He is old enough to control his hormone.

_I'm not_ _old enough to resist her morning voice._

He admits after his cock twitched at the sound of that soft sigh.

"Michonne," Rick breathes out while his hand slips in his underwear.

"oh good," Michonne says with a satisfied tone.

For a few seconds, Rick minds focus on the sound of the word on her lips. He reflexively runs his hand along with his manhood.

"You recognised me." She sounds surprised. "My number, I didn't give it to you." Michonne pursues. "Rick?" She calls for him when all she hears are breaths, which create an interesting photograph in her mind.

"I'm here;" He groans the words.

_I'm going straight to hell. _He sincerely believes he would earn his way in the purgatory flames for masturbating on the sound of her voice. However, he cannot care beyond the moment and the honey tone of her voice saying his name.

"Good," She repeats.

For a few minutes, she hesitates. Michonne softly breathes while she searches for her words. Each breath sounds like the sweetest moan.

Rick works his length at the rhythm of those moans. He is getting close. His head conjures memories of Michonne in that white satin dress, which she wore in their non-date date.

Her curves in the same dress, which he was peeling off her body in his wet dream while his tongue was licking her smooth skin, haunted his mind.

"Doctor Grimes?" She sounds almost timid and breathless.

_Why is she doing this to me? She should say it every time._

Rick licks his lower lip. He is a word away from an orgasm.

He is a moan away from spilling his seed on his thigh.

He does not know what he wants to hear her say, but his release rests on the random chance that she says what he needs to hear.

"Rick," Michonne deeply breathes, "I want you…"

"Fuck," Rick groans, and his free hand closes the microphone of his cellular.

_Oh, god, this is bad._ Rick admits as he begins to come down from his sexual haze. Did Rick use Michonne's voice to get off? _Yes and came hard_. He thinks with creeping embarrassment.

"Do you hear me?" Michonne's voice fills his buzzing ear. "Rick?"

"Sorry," Rick replies. "I was in the middle of an emergency getting out of hand." He looks at his hand covered with his cum. "You said you wanted me." He attempts to regulate his breathing.

"Oh no, I was talking to Carl, your son?" She says.

_Kill me, or castrate me._ Rick resists the impulse to yell those words. "He didn't want to stop crying."

"Do you need my help?" He quickly says.

He needs to redeem himself for jerking off with her in mind.

"I have wiped their tears for five years. I can handle motherhood." Michonne retorts with a biting tone.

"I didn't mean anything saying I could help. I would be glad to help. I would love it if you wanted to help me." He knows how foolish he sounds.

Rick has become an expert into disconnected sentences around Michonne.

"Forget that entire statement." He clears his throat.

"How Rick Grimes of you," She mumbles, but he hears her. "Okay, I called because I think something is wrong with RJ." She sounds slightly worried. "I know it is two in the morning. I wanted to go to the hospital, but then I have your number. It doesn't look as serious as the other days. I'm panicking. I know I'm panicking." Michonne speaks at an almost inaudible pace. "I'm bothering you at two in the morning. I don't know if I should take him to the hospital. I'm going to take him to the hospital. You're right." She continues.

"Give me your address; I'm coming to check on him." Rick calmly filters through Michonne's panic. "Send me a picture of what you think is wrong. I would know if you have to go straight to the hospital or wait for me home."

"Okay," she agrees.

A few minutes later, he receives a picture of RJ's mouth and Michonne's address.

"I'm coming." He insists.

"I'm sorry. I got you coming all the way home." Michonne genuinely sounds apologetic.

"I don't mind," Rick replies.

* * *

Rick waits before Michonne's door. He took the time to shower, and the water from his hair didn't dry completely. Some drops break on his shoulder. He hears her step, and the door opens.

_Fuck. Fuck. I couldn't have an ugly baby mama. I have a walking fantasy_. _What in the porn territory is going on? _Rick thinks when his eyes cannot resist stealing glances at Michonne's legs.

"Did you wait forever?" She asks while she steps away from the door.

"No, I didn't," Rick replies.

Rick does not want to pursue until he has control over his mind. Now, he is trying to tell himself that she has something below that black jersey. There must be a short, which is microscopic.

"Come in," Michonne says when Rick stands purposeless at the door.

"Sorry, I'm slightly sleepy." Rick finds an excuse, which is better than _I was questioning how you get your skin to shine._

"I'm sorry." Michonne softly says. "I know I'm panicking. He doesn't have a fever, and he was okay all day. I…" Michonne takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry."

"You're doing an amazing job." Rick extends his hand, and the tips of his fingers graze her face. "It's better to be overzealous than to miss something. It's cancer, but it applies to every disease with children." He comforts Michonne.

"I learned the hard way." Michonne sighs.

Rick reads the exhaustion on her face. Her concerned expression nips at his resolve to keep a certain emotional distance. He cannot be too intimate with a mother's patient. _My son. The mother of my son.  
_

"Come here," He sounds cajoling and tender.

His hands cradle her face.

Rick holds Michonne with uttermost care.

His hands run from her cheeks to her arms.

"One thing needs to be clear. It's not your fault." He firmly says. "If we even try blaming genetics, it is probably coming from my side." He adds with the kindest tone. "But we're not playing the blame game because it's pointless, and we didn't create leukaemia." He rubs her arm. "You're doing the heavy lifting just right."

"Thank you." Michonne wraps her arms around Rick.

He closes his arms around her waist. Rick loves how her body melts into his. They fit beautifully like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. He naturally feels the inclination to kiss her temple. He does it, and she sighs with content.

He was wrong, and she is wearing nothing but a lace panty under that football jersey. The tips of his fingers graze the fabric and the silk skin on her bottom when he breaks the hug, and she takes a few seconds before moving out of his personal space.

"I'm a mess." Michonne chuckles as she wipes tears of exhaustion.

"The prettiest one." He replies as an automatism. He is sincere as he failed to filter his thoughts. "I mean...I mean." Rick stops before stuttering.

"It does not matter what you mean." She chuckles. It is rich and sexy. "I'm keeping the compliment."

He smirks and takes a step back instead of kissing her passionately. They share a silence for a minute. The air is heavy with hesitation and sizzling desires.

"RJ," Michonne announces when she overcomes her need.

_Why does he look fuckable in pyjama pants and a washed t-shirt?_ She shakes her head at her thirst for Rick Grimes. It is every day more embarrassing as he shows how little she meant in his life.

"Yeah," Rick agrees.

* * *

Now, Michonne feels worse. She looks at her watch, and she feels sorry for Rick. How did she miss it?

"I swear! I'm fairly good at motherhood." Michonne says while she places her hand over Rick' shoulder, and she attempts to look over him.

"I know," Rick chuckles," You called me at two in the morning." He teases.

Michonne is slightly enamoured with his ease. She would admit that she melts when he shows how easy-going he is. His attitude is at the opposite of her cerebral nature.

"For a loose tooth," Michonne deadpans. "I called the wrong service."

She says, and he laughs as he carefully probes RJ's bottom teeth.

"We have two loose teeth." He tells Michonne.

"Well done, RJ." He lifts his hand for RJ to high five. "You're becoming a big boy." He adds with a smile.

"Like you?" RJ asks curiously.

"Just like me." He agrees, "You're losing your first teeth."

Rick stands from RJ's bedside.

He does not want to leave the room. He does not want to leave his son.

Rick looks at Michonne, which now is serene and as gorgeous as ever.

It feels wrong to step out and go about his life. He almost wishes to fit into the wall only to stay around.

"I…"

Michonne's forefinger on his lips interrupts him. She stares at the door. Rick notices the noise in front of RJ's door.

"Triplet," Michonne says, and she pulls her finger away from his lips. "It does not matter if they don't share the same room. If one is awake, they are all awake."

Michonne pulls open the door. Rick has the reflex to catch a falling Carl, and Michonne swiftly stretches to prevent Judith's fall.

"What did I say last time you did this?" Michonne immediately chastises the pair.

Rick has to blink to retrieve his senses.

"It's dangerous," Carl answers while nesting on his father's hips.

"Oh my god, you often climb on your sister's shoulders." Rick confusedly asks.

Carl nods, and he looks at his mother. He cannot lie while he already did something wrong.

"The door handle is slightly high for them," Michonne explains. "I have to change it. Someone is going to break something one day trying to go into their brother or sister room."

_Children are crackheads. _ Rick thinks with slight amusement.

He begins to chuckle.

"Oh no," Michonne sighs. "Why me?" She adds with a bitter tone when Carl also chuckles. "You're the cool parent." She says with accusation.

Rick looks at Michonne with slight confusion.

"Look at this," She points between the pair they form with their children. "I'm lecturing them about the danger of their actions. You find their antics funny."

Rick stops laughing, but he wants to do so when he looks at her endearing pout.

"I don't find it funny." Michonne rolls her eyes at his lie. "A little because it is cute that they want to be with their brother." He admits.

Michonne sighs, and she gives up on lecturing her babies at almost three in the morning.

"We'll talk about this in the morning. Now, everyone goes to bed." She announces.

Rick waits for Michonne to lead. He does not know if she expects him to hand over Carl. He does not want to let go of his son.

Looking at this moment, he might want to fit in this life.

He does not immediately admit as much for his sake. He only enjoys being the fun parent as Michonne's claim.

"Everyone is sleeping here, or I will have to watch the door." She places Judith next to RJ.

Rick does the same. He steps away from the bed.

He intends to leave the room.

"Doctor Richard," Judith immediately stops him.

"Mama is going to read the story and give us kisses." She adds.

"You need to listen to the story and get a kiss," Carl says as if it is a mandatory process.

"Oh," Rick looks at Michonne for reference.

"The sofa," she orders him to go along with the children's will, or they would waste the night convincing Carl, Judith, and RJ not to cry. Judith coerced her enough time. When she leads, her brothers obey to the T.

"Now, this story," Michonne picks the book, and she continues where she stopped last night.

Rick watches for the sofa._ Was I mad? _ He cannot believe he did not want to be a father.

It feels ridiculous how he considers this moment to be one of pure magic. Michonne makes parenthood look like a beautiful thing.

It might be a marvellous thing.

With all the worries and the chance to fail, it can be incredible.

Michonne continues to pretend to be a dragon until their children one after the other fall asleep. She closes the book, and she kisses their forehead.

"Daddy turns," Michonne whispers without a thought.

Michonne only feels that it is right for tonight. He played his role tonight. Rick helped me. It is a small step, but it is in a direction, which Michonne wants to explore.

Rick leaves the sofa. He delicately moves Judith's hair away from her face, and he kisses her forehead. He is as tender with his son.

For a few minutes, Michonne feels bitter. It is different from her usual mild jealousy at how simple he makes it look to earn her children love. It is bitterness out of regret that it took five years to have this moment.

She is mad at Rick.

She is disappointed with herself for quitting her search for him when she did.

She hates Rick's girlfriend for partly being right.

He didn't want children. He might never want them. It does not matter now, he has children. He is trying. She wants him to stay longer with his babies. With a bit of sincerity, Michonne wants him.

"I will be down if you need a minute with them." Michonne leaves the room.

Rick takes the olive branch, which she extends.

He returns to the sofa. He watches his children sleep cramped in a small bed.

He cannot believe he has three gorgeous cherubs.

"All came from me," He says in awe. "A father," he repeats to get a feel of the words. "I can't fuck this up, can I?" He realises how it is more than taking in the news.

Rick might have to stop falls.

He would have to check for loose teeth. He would have to be a dragon while telling stories.

He would have to love them, and it is the most natural part. _I love this crackhead._ He already adores them. He scratches his head.

"I can't fuck this up."

* * *

Rick returns down almost an hour later. It was hard to choose to leave. He wants to give his all to this fatherhood thing. He already destroyed his schedule to watch them sleep.

"No one was faking to sleep?" Michonne asks.

"Judith only went to sleep now," Rick replies. "You're amazing." He has to say.

Michonne smiles, and she drags her jersey down. He might have seen too much of her panty. His eyes linger on the hem of her shirt.

"Am I?" Michonne asks with modesty.

"Have you seen the children you're raising?" Rick says with admiration. "They take after you on that trait."

_Here, he goes. Michonne, hold your common sense._ She tells in her head.

"I had five years to perfect my parenting style." She clarifies. "I still have to work on being able to dismiss certain tantrums. They are a bit spoiled. I have to negotiate three hours at least to go on a date. In case you wondered why Judith came along last time."

Rick smirks. Life is unfair to him. He broke up with his fiancé, who he does not know how to feel about now. He has an immense infatuation for Michonne Barnes. It is a messy cocktail when they are going to co-parent for the rest of their life.

"And still our children are perfect." Rick points out. "I won't fuck it up. Call me any time you want my help. At your pace, I'm okay with you leading." He adds.

Michonne swallows, and she hates this man for how good he is. Now, she regrets not having him while she found out about the babies.

"It's late." Michonne wisely points out. "I hope you don't have to work tomorrow."

Rick chuckles, and he does not state that he always works. He has a morning shift in four hours.

"The lack of sleep is worth it." He replies.

"I will see you out."

* * *

Michonne stops at her door. She has almost forgiven him for his half-assed answer four days ago. She hates it that he does not remember her. It makes her feel small, but she can look over it. She will try to live without knowledge of why he cannot remember.

"Good night, Rick." She says when he crosses the door.

Rick draws a deep breath. He holds her hand, and so Michonne cannot immediately close the door on him and this moment.

"Just a minute," Rick asks. "I have a question to answer." He murmurs endearingly.

His eyes reflect the beauty of his smile.

"You found your memories." Michonne teases.

"Hopefully, I never do," Rick genuinely replies. "I didn't choose to erase you. Of that dehumanizing period, you are the only face, which I wished stuck with me. In a way, you did stay in my mind. Your memories are slipping through the walls blocking all the ugliness of my time as a sex worker." He clarifies.

"You don't have to…"

Rick interrupts Michonne. His fingers pluck her skin in search of comfort.

"There is nothing glamorous about a gigolo. Even for the lucky few like me that get high profile clients, it is a shitty job. I could choose who and how. Still, it didn't feel right for me. I didn't want to remember the face of anyone who saw as a pricy toy or a sexual experience." He rushes the words. "I was the latter for you. I don't think I enjoyed the sex with anyone but you, and it seems my real orgasm was worth three children." He attempts humour.

She didn't expect to care for the man. Rick made her care for him with a few hours of conversation.

"I blocked it all for my sanity. My mind dealt with a bulk of one year and a half like it was trauma. In a way, I think you stand right at the border of that need to erase an entire year." He continues in a softer tone.

"I might have thought if I wasn't that man, I would be her fiancé then her husband. I wanted to erase a year so badly that my mind did it. I didn't forget you as per se I erased an experience, which made it impossible to have you. I thought about being good for you. I only forgot that I met you while being a gigolo." He finishes with an amused tone." However, let's say you're unforgettable. You're the best sex of my life, and I haven't successfully erased that. The night after you left my office, you were already my only thought."

His knuckles draw her jawline. What does he expect from this confession? _Fuck Rick Grimes_. Michonne laments half-heartedly. She stops his hand dancing on her visage. She brings his arm around her waist, and she stands on her toes.

Michonne closes her arms around his neck. He talked his way into this. She prefers the stuttering mess to the gut-wrenching talker who used vulnerability and sincerity to make her forgive and act a fool.

_This is bird logic. _Michonne admits. _You shouldn't want to suck your baby daddy dick. Here, we're_. She disregards her common sense.

Michonne presses her lips on Rick's lip.

He tastes sweeter than she remembers. It is a wine phenomenon.

His taste is more refined with age.

He kisses better than he did six years ago, which is a sin because it was perfection at that time.

He carefully puts his hand between the door and Michonne. Her back brushes his knuckles. Rick drags her closer to him and his muscle flexes under her finger.

He kisses her as tenderly as needed yet with a consuming passion. It feels like her soul takes a bath in a wildfire. His fingers are feather-like, soothing and yet leaving a ghost sensation that grips her needs. Michonne wraps a thigh around his waist.

With his free hand, Rick swiftly lifts her. She moans in his mouth. She closes her legs around his waist. Her clothed cunt grazed Rick's erected manhood clad into the fabric of his pyjama.

Rick pushes the door open, and he continues to kiss her soul away. Rick and Michonne stumble into the living room. Michonne begins to drag his t-shirt. _Finallyyyyyyy_. She thinks when he presses her against a wall. Michonne does not care if they don't make it further than the living room floor. Rick suddenly stops kissing her.

"What is…?" Michonne does not have the time to finish her question. "Oh god." She looks at the pair of blue eyes questioning her actions.

"It's dangerous. Put mama down." Carl says unperturbed by the scene of Rick lifting his mother.

"Oh my god," Michonne slaps Rick's arm forgetting her precarious position. "Carl is right," she almost jumps out of Rick's arm. "You don't open doors lifting other people."

Rick blinks, and he cannot move away from Michonne because he might have to explain an erection to his five years son if he does.

"True," Rick says. "Just like you don't explain this to children." He subtly thrusts in Michonne.

"Oh okay," Michonne wants to disappear to the floor. "Baby, do you want something?"

"Water," Carl replies while he eyes his mother and Rick with curiosity.

"Okay," Michonne escapes the narrow space between the door and Rick. "Let go get your glass, and Rick will go home." She emphasizes on the last part. "Because it is not right, and it is dangerous what we did."

"I will go home." Rick agrees.

"Goodbye, Doctor Richard." Carl hugs Rick's leg.

"Goodbye, honey." Rick kisses the crown of Carl's head.

"Goodnight, Michonne," Rick says when he heads toward the exit.

Michonne rolls her eyes at the situation.

_Bird's move leads to broken eggs… stay away from Rick Grimes._


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank for the reviews**

**I don't own the walking dead**

**Please, reviews**

* * *

**Chapter VII**

* * *

Evelyn blinks, and then she once again stares at her granddaughter. She never expected such a specific question.

Evelyn knew the question would arise one day, but she believed it would be Michonne's role to answer. Now, the formulation of the question is peculiar.

She stares at Judith in panic. Evelyn almost believes silence and feigned incomprehension will drive Judith away. She is wrong. Judith pulls on her grandmother's pants to gain her attention.

"What is a daddy, Nana?" Judith curiously asks.

Evelyn gives up all pretence. She draws a deep breath, and she readies herself to do the good thing.

"Michonne?" Evelyn yells, "Come talk to your child." She adds.

Judith's big eyes are on her grandmother, and she waits for an answer to her question. Evelyn squirms under her granddaughter's scrutinizing eyes.

"What is a daddy, Nana?" Judith insists.

Evelyn again calls her daughter. Michonne walks in with Carl on her hips and her father following her.

"Mama, why are you shouting my name?" Michonne inquires while she comes to sit.

"Repeat your question, sweetheart." Evelyn encourages Judith.

Michonne looks at the exchange between Evelyn and Judith. She patiently waits for clarifications.

"Mama…" Michonne is on the verge to reiterate her question when Judith speaks.

"What is a daddy?"

Her eyes travel from her grandmother to her mother. The adults in the room share a glance. Michonne hesitates.

"What is a daddy?" Michonne repeats. "Oh," she stutters.

"It's a bad word?" Judith supplements when Michonne begins to lose her ability to speak.

"No, it isn't a bad word." Michonne's father intervenes. "I'm a daddy." He adds. "I'm your mama's daddy." He explains at the best of his ability.

Judith is sceptical. She stares curiously at her grandfather.

"You're pawpaw," Judith argues. "Mama's daddy is Doctor Richard." She continues with confidence. "Mama calls Doctor Richard daddy." She says in a slurred speech, which only worsens the impact of the statement.

Every look converges toward Michonne. She is a shell filled with shock and confusion. _This child_.

"Well," Evelyn says. "We went from I can't dress up for him to daddy." She pointedly says.

"Mama," Michonne grunts. "I don't call Doctor Richard daddy."

"Lieeeeees…" Judith yells. "Lying is bad, mommy." She lectures her mother.

_Nine months...nine months._ Michonne cannot help the thought.

"I'm not lying, sweetheart." Michonne insists.

Judith squints her eyes. She stares at her mother, as Michonne would do if circumstances were reversed.

"Mommy is doing bad things," Judith concludes with a disapproving tone. "A daddy is a bad thing."

"Well, Michonne." Her father says. "The kid needs a good explanation. I'm an appalled father, and your mother is curious. Some explaining will help." He resumes the situation.

Michonne draws a deep breath. She does not call Rick Grimes daddy, and she has no intentions to do so in the future.

"Daddy's turn…" Judith repeats with a voice made deep to imitate her mother. "Daddy's turn." She sings like a bird.

_Fuck me._

Michonne draws a deep breath, and she prays for patience. She looked at her daughter who was not sleeping last night when Michonne said that sentence.

"Judith," Michonne softly calls for her daughter to stop.

"Daddy's turn," Judith parrots. "Daddy's turn." She repeats.

_Jail sounds appealing._ Michonne thinks while she feels her patience straining.

"Okay, I called him daddy only last night," Michonne confesses to stop Judith. "It's not a bad thing. Mommy does not do bad things with Doctor Richard." She clarifies.

"Lieeees," Carl yells. "Doctor Richard, he…." He stops speaking and leaves his mother's arms to walk toward the stairs. "Carried mommy like this to open the door. It was dangerous. You did a bad thing with Doctor Richard."

_Snitch everywhere!_ Michonne laments. She wants the floor to swallow her.

"I'm going to leave this room." Michonne's father says. "This is for your mother to hear and tell me the censored version. I don't know how far this conversation would go, but I…" He gives a pointed look at Michonne. "Calling anybody daddy, my little girl. I have heard it all."

Michonne looks at the ceiling. She does not know which of her children is the worst now. Carl comes to climb on her laps. Michonne rests her chin on the crown of his head.

"Mama, don't say anything. It isn't what you think." Michonne anticipates her mother's comment. "Nothing happened."

Evelyn rolls her eyes. She cannot believe her daughter would blatantly lie.

"He platonically lifted you against the staircase. Dangerous behaviours." She sucks her teeth.

"Mama," Michonne sighs. "You should join dad. I'm going to handle this, and you can try to establish what is platonic or not." She finishes.

Evelyn agrees, and she leaves Michonne with her two children.

* * *

"So you heard everything last night," Michonne pointedly stares at Judith, who reddens. "What did I say about pretending to sleep?" She softly asks.

Judith climbs on the spot next to her mother. She has a contrite expression.

"It is a bad thing," Judith says with a small voice. "Mama, you do bad things too. Daddy is a bad word." She pouts and throws a judgmental look at her mother.

"It's not a bad word," Michonne tenderly says.

For a minute, she pauses with an aching heart.

Five years down the line, admitting that her children do not know the meaning of daddy is painful. Like the bad words, Carl, Judith, and RJ cannot use the word daddy.

"Go get your brother," Michonne asks Carl.

The time has come to begin to brush the topic. Michonne does not have a clue on where to start. She wanted something, which she could gradually plan.

_A moment of inattention._ Michonne regrets how a simple sentence while she thought her children slept can have so many repercussions.

Michonne quietly waits for her sons. She should call Rick. She doesn't know how to proceed. Small steps draw Michonne out of her thoughts.

RJ is rubbing his eyes heavy with sleep while Carl drags him by the hand. Michonne finds it hard to breathe. She does not feel ready to accept everything. The idea of having a virtual stranger play such a role in her children's lives is frightening.

"Here," Carl drags RJ before their mother.

"Thank you," Michonne says, and she picks RJ from the floor to sit him on her lap.

"Do you…" Michonne hesitates. "What is a daddy?" She settles on the original question.

Her children's eyes curiously follow her. Michonne finds it difficult to respond to a question, which nature answers. A few people might not know the answer from experience, but the response is universally established.

"To make babies like you," Michonne pinches Judith's cheek. "You need a mommy and a daddy. A daddy is a boy mommy." She offers the sketch of an answer. "Nana is my mommy, and pawpaw is my daddy. They came together to make me."

From the frowns on all her children's faces, Michonne knows that a wave of questions will follow their understanding.

"Mama," RJ looks at Michonne, and she knows he is about to hit her with the contentious issue." We don't have a daddy?"

"Everyone has a daddy."

Excited eyes fall on Michonne. Another hard question follows.

"Where is daddy?" RJ asks.

Michonne takes a minute. She contemplates stalling with a half-made answer. How simple it would be to say_ I made you alone. _ She thinks selfishly, and it is comforting.

"On his way," Michonne replies. "Your daddy is a bit late because when we were making you we used magic."

_Where am I going with this bullshit?_ Michonne thinks with confusion.

"You know magic has consequences," She continues on shaky words. "The consequence was that your daddy would be a bit late because of magic."

_How do I say to five years old that you daddy was a prostitute who banged me once and disappeared_? Michonne internally suffers. _He is paying for their therapy if I have to put them in front of the truth._

"Only magic for bad things," RJ argues.

"We are bad things," Carl brightly concludes.

Michonne's heart sinks, and her children are minutes away from tears. She does not know how she is going to save the day. She draws a deep breath.

"That is a lie, which I never want to hear again. Babies, you're the best things your daddy and I could make. That is why we needed magic, but good magic also has consequences. Remember Cinderella."

_Oh god, what is this nonsensical example?_ Michonne secretly panics.

"Magic gave her the dress, but the consequences came at midnight." Michonne clarifies. "Then the Prince took a bit of time to find her. With your daddy, it is almost the same thing. It took a bit of time, but he is coming. You will have your daddy soon. I promise."

Her children's eyes scrutinise her face. Judith nods first. Carl, Judith, and RJ quietly accept her words for a fact.

"I didn't lose a shoe," Carl laments. "Daddy doesn't have my shoe."

Michonne breathes with a bit of relief. She can handle this part better than she did the explaining.

"Your daddy does not need a slipper," Michonne replies. "He's going to look at you and know because he loves you. There is magic between you and him." She clarifies. "You only need to wait for a little and not worry."

"Daddy is a charming prince," Judith says with excitement.

Michonne laughs, and she supposes her daughter's claim is truthful. Rick Grimes is charming.

"Does he have a horse?" Carl suddenly asks.

"He has a car," Michonne chuckles.

"But the Prince has a horse." Judith pouts.

"He is a modern-day prince." Michonne retorts. "But you can ask him for a horse when he finds us." She says out of pettiness with a small smile.

"Mama," RJ calls for Michonne, and she looks at him. "If daddy has a car, he will come fast."

Michonne smirks, and she agrees. Now, it does not matter how slow she wants it to happen.

"Absolutely."

* * *

Rick throws his phone on the couch, and Shane laughs. He does not know when Lori would stop calling, but he hopes to ignore her would seal the deal.

"You know the blacklist is a thing," Shane says while he picks Rick's phone. "Or you can pick the call to clarify the situation. There is no chance in hell you're going to give her a second chance. Do you want me to do it? I can announce the news." He asks with giddiness.

Rick snatches his phone from Shane's hand, and he rejects the call.

"It is a four-year relationship," Rick reminds his best friend. "It's just…"

Shane snorts, and he knows too well, what kept Rick and Lori's relationship afloat.

"It's four years with your default choice. It is four years because she knows what your dirty secrets are, and she pretends to be okay with it. The woman, who you want, is so inaccessible that you refused to remember her. It's not complicated, and so don't make excuses. "Shane argues.

Rick throws his exhausted body on the sofa.

"Being a neurosurgeon does not make you an expert into emotions," Rick says while begrudging the accuracy of what his best friend said.

"Being your longest friend makes me an expert in you." Shane remains unfazed. "You are living your break-up so well. You're glowing. No, let me give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar, the glow is all from your baby mama."

Rick looks at Shane. He wonders if his friend can shut up on certain topics for his peace.

"Michonne and I are in a complicated spot. There are three kids in between us. It is…" Rick has difficulties vocalizing the complexity of their situation. "Carl, Judith, and RJ are priorities. It means nothing else matters, and their parents' libido is the less important thing. Once we solve our situation, I can risk it. I want to be with my children. I need to focus on getting to a point where I'm a liable father. There are so many decisions, which I have to make. I don't like half of them, but I need to make them. Sex or anything besides the children has no place in my life now."

Shane listens, and he knows when Rick makes excuses.

"You need to heal from that first time," Shane bluntly says. "You need to open the gate blocking the memory of that night and work on that thing, which has you waxed poetics only to say what we both know. You don't want Michonne to reject you."

"Did you listen to me?" Rick questions. "I'm not privileging something carnal over my children." He doubles down.

Shane laughs, and it is a rejection of Rick's claim.

"Did you think the same way when you almost sent your cockblocking son in therapy? You were two seconds away from showing Carl how he came to be. The staircase! I don't have children, and I have the common sense to reach a room."

"Shane, you ain't shit," Rick says while he fails to argue.

"I know," Shane laughs. "I'm still smart enough to tell you to cut off your gold digger and try harder when you have a chance to win the woman you want." He continues with seriousness.

"Shane, cut the motivational speaker bullshit." Rick deadpans.

"You don't need to pause anything besides your rhythm of working to be a good dad. You can't be a bad dad. You're Rick Grimes, and…"

Rick's ringtone interrupts Shane. Rick is about to reject the call when he sees the caller ID. He puts his finger before his mouth to silence his best friend.

"Hello, Michonne," Rick replies. "Is everything fine?"

* * *

Michonne knocks at the door, and she is uncertain of her decision.

However, Michonne is back against the wall. She again knocks at the door. It opens on a face, which she recognises. For a second, she frowns.

"Don't worry I'm leaving." Rick's friend says, and he comes out, "Before I leave, your friend is single?"

Michonne blinks, and she only thinks of Sasha going into endless praise of this man's look.

"Sasha," Michonne asks, "She is."

_Oh, this is going to be a mess_. Michonne thinks with amusement. She can tell it would be a volatile mixture.

"Here," Shane drags a piece of paper from his pocket and writes on it. "This is a long shot, but I'm going on the principle that love-at-first-sight is a two-way street. Have her call me before she is no longer single." He presses the piece of paper in Michonne's hand.

"Euh...okay," Michonne can only laugh. "I will." She holds onto the piece of paper.

"Thank you," Shane says, "And everywhere but the couch. It cost a fortune." He winks and walks away.

Michonne pauses, and the meaning of what Shane said sinks. _Does everyone think we fuck?_ Michonne thinks with concern. _Why wouldn't they when you come to his place at night_? Her thoughts betray her.

Michonne sighs, and she knocks on the open door to announce her presence.

"Shane, get the door," Rick's voice erupts in the living room.

"He left," Michonne yells back.

…

…

…

Michonne caught Rick off guard in that strange moment when he is not a paediatrist or her children's father. Rick Grimes is only a man. She sits in the corner of his sofa, and Rick attempts to dry his curls.

"I thought you would show up tomorrow," Rick says with slight confusion.

He glances at his watch, and it is not late per se. However, it is a time where urgent visits happen. From their quick conversation on the phone, Rick did not sense Michonne's urgency.

"Oh," Michonne replies. "I'm…" Rick's ringtone interrupts her. "Your phone?" She points out when he shows no interest in it.

"No one that matters," Rick grabs his phone, and he rejects Lori's twenty-third call in the hour.

Michonne's eyebrows express her curiosity. _Mind your business._ She attempts to quiet her wandering mind.

"Could be work or someone sick." Michonne fails to silence her mind.

Rick smiles as a way to answer. Now, Michonne's curiosity increases. When the phone rings again, she attempts to catch a glimpse of the caller ID. Rick looks at Michonne, and she averts her eyes.

"From experience, I would say it is an ex or a girlfriend." Michonne tastes the water at the fourth call since her arrival.

Rick rejects the call, and he settles for blacklisting the number as Shane suggested.

"I don't have a girlfriend." Rick calmly replies.

He does not tell her since when, and Rick will not know what marked the end of his relationship with Lori.

"I didn't ask," Michonne softly replies. _But you're glad to know._ She thinks with delight, which she has to push down the giddiness.

"You implied it," Rick smirks, "After what happened last night, you're in your right." He continues.

Michonne draws a deep breath. She thought and rethought last night. Her feelings are a mixture of insecurities and clear priorities.

"Last night," Michonne repeats, and she thinks on how to follow up the conversation.

"It's something we have to talk about," Rick continues her sentence.

"Yeah…between other things."

Rick and Michonne do not mention last night. Last night is something to talk about in a few days when their make-up session feels like a mistake on both sides.

Michonne wants to believe that it was a bad idea to cross that line. Rick is on the same wave of thoughts. The reality is different, which is why Rick and Michonne are silently sharing the living room.

Rick, tired of standing, takes a spot in the other corner of the couch. He discards his towel on the table.

"You said something about the children." Rick rips into the silence.

_Oh let's handle this better than what I did with the children._ Michonne encourages herself.

No one would believe she is an eloquent lawyer with the way Rick Grimes fresh out of the shower turns her into an incoherent mess.

"Judith," Michonne begins to explain.

She stops to arrange her hair into a bun. She cannot fit every lock into her hands, and some spill forwards like a curtain, which blinds her.

Rick instinctively reaches for Michonne's hair to help her.

Michonne's hands stop moving when Rick's fingers graze her face. She looks before her, and he is in her personal space. His minty shower gel scent saturates the air.

Michonne inhales Rick's perfume, and the sight of content escapes her lips. She stops attempting to tie her hair. Michonne's mouthparts to say the needed words to recreate the distance between them.

However, the words die in her throat. Michonne's mouth is dry, and she licks her lips. Her hair spills over Rick's hands.

_Run. Run. Bad idea._ Michonne's mind yells, but her body neglects the order. She imperceptibly moves to be closer to Rick. His fingers delicately frame her face. His thumb grazes her skin.

Rick's body swallows the safe distance. He is almost half-sprawled across her. Michonne slips below Rick, and she welcomes his weight. Many of her thoughts have faded.

Rick's nose brushes Michonne's jaws. His lips move along her visage like a hairbrush. Michonne gasps. She had the intention of a conversation, and everything has disappeared. Michonne only has one thought.

_Kiss me_. Her mind chants.

Rick's lips leave her face to roam along her neck. His teeth gently nibble on the curve of her neck, and his tongue draws paths of fire, which ravish her skin.

Rick takes Michonne's right leg, and he wraps it around his waist. He settles between her legs, and their joined bodies sink with the couch.

Rick threads his finger in her hair. Michonne wants more than teasing caress. She yearns for Rick to kiss her. She drowns in the delight of his bolder caress.

The caress remains on the safe side. A sensual exploration of her body, Rick's fingers dance on Michonne's curve. His palm pressed on the bare inch of her skin. He is meticulously like a farm plucking strawberry in early winter.

The hem of Michonne's dress lies now when the lace of her panties appears. Michonne did not think this night through. From her choice of attire to the easy access of her skin, she subconsciously might have prepared for a tryst.

Rick's palms settle on Michonne's thighs. The tips of his fingers brush the hem of her panties. She anticipates Rick's next caress. It takes longer to come. His hands still on the silk of her thighs. They are warm, and Michonne is hyper-aware of his touch.

Michonne steals a shallow breath. Her lungs do not need air when filled with the scent of Rick. His lips travel from her neck to her earlobe. His teeth delicately close around it, and his tongue soothes the ache when he unclasps his teasing bite.

Between smooth and quiet breath, Rick whispers words in Michonne's ear.

"I still remember what you like."

Rick's words are ones, which Michonne wants to argue against with vigour.

How would he remember such precious details when their first night was Michonne's grand sexual discovery?

She reacted to everything.

Six years ago, she had not refined her sexual taste. Rick could have done anything, and as long as he did it right, Michonne would have climaxed.

However, the well-constructed objection never makes it past her lips. Rick's lips brush Michonne's ones. His teeth graze her bottom lip in a teasing way with a promise of special attention.

_Fuck,_ Michonne's conviction falters. Rick smiles, and it is endearing and sensual. His hands push further the hem of her dress. The fabric of his pants grazes her thighs. The harshness of the denim is oddly comforting and grounding Michonne into reality.

_It's happening. _Michonne cannot prevent the thought.

Rick presses his lips against Michonne's one. There is a new taste of mint. Far from the frenzy of last night, it is a lazy kiss. This is a kiss, which he has worked to earn. He savours every drop of her taste.

Rick is slow and tender. His fingers continue to flirt with her clothed cunt. Michonne moans with each caress, and his tongue curls around those sounds of pleasure as a cat's tongue do with milk.

The joust between their tongues is one of patience. It draws with each breath. Rick's taste spreads on her tongue.

Each kiss grows passionate with the wait. It is passion retained with the promise of culmination. Rick takes her second leg and has Michonne's limbs circle his waist. The warmth of Rick's body radiates on her skin. Michonne wraps her arm around his shoulders to maintain him closer.

Rick and Michonne continue to kiss at a lazy pace. It takes longer to feel breathless, but Michonne's mind is hazy.

Rick's hand travels to Michonne's collarbone, and his finger sneaks between her skin and the strap of her dress. He pushes it down, and she eagerly helps him with the second strap. They continue kissing between gasps and moan.

Michonne pulls on Rick's shirt. The passage of fabric on Rick's lips interrupts their kiss, and it is an annoyance, which lasts a few seconds. Michonne discards the shirt, and she voraciously latches on Rick's bare chest. Her tongue closes around his nipple.

He looks at her with eyes discoloured by lust clogging his irises. Michonne kisses his chin. Her mouth closed on his Adam's apple. Her tongue tattooed kisses along the curve of his neck.

Rick looks at her bare perky breast, and he cups one. Michonne's dress lies folded on her stomach. Rick's finger continues to flirt with the waistband of her panty. His short nails brush the French lace.

He pulls away from her adoring kiss.

Rick sinks his teeth in the flesh of her breast. His fingers dip between her inner thighs.

Michonne's arousal coats his fingers and the small piece of fabric, which prevents the tactile intimate caress.

Rick twists Michonne's panty around his palm, and his thumb brushes the slit between her labials. Michonne chokes a moan. She swallows her scepticism. Rick Grimes knows what key needed to write an exquisite sonata for her body.

Michonne grips his arms, and her nails sink in the defined muscle.

Rick continues to suck and lick Michonne's breast while his thumb brushes her clitoris with a light stroke. Each caress and sensual attention has Michonne melting and clinging to Rick.

Rick kisses Michonne breastbone. Alternating between tender kisses and passionate nibbling,

He digs a sinuous path of kisses and scars on Michonne's skin.

He pulls his hand away from her cunt, and Michonne feels the loss of it. The beginning of orgasm coils in the heart of her femininity. Anything will turn it into a raging fire yet she suffers an unquenchable desire.

Rick drags Michonne's legs on his shoulder. Michonne cringes at the thought to receive cunnilingus. Th4 few times when anyone performed it on her, it was unsettling to say the list. It was far from what erotic novel sold to her. Michonne's thighs contract and she has again that sexual timidity, which she had six years ago. It has a lot to do with Rick. His knuckles lay caresses on her jaws as lightly as a butterfly balancing on a leaf.

"Relax," Rick softly says and kisses her thigh. "I need to make you feel good," Rick's tongue collects the nectar smearing her thigh. "I'm going to eat you real good." His eyes captivated her interest.

Michonne cries in pleasure when his mouth recovers her lace-clad cunt. Rick sucks on Michonne's cunt, and his teeth graze the lace. She feels enough for comfort. Michonne wants more, and she twists her hand around his hair with nails tangling on the strands. Michonne pushes Rick's head down, and she maintains him between her thighs.

Rick pulls Michonne's panty to the side and his tongue coils around her cunt reaching the heart of her desire. Michonne moans, and her grip tightens around his head. Rick makes sinful noises each time her sweet taste coats his tongue.

Michonne has never received a sweeter kiss. Rick is dedicated, and he kisses every inch of her cunt. He drinks every ounce of her feminine nectar.

Half-risen on her elbow, the sight of Rick eating her out with gusto tightens the coil in Michonne's abdomen. Her toes curl when his tongue dips in her core. She feels breathless when his thumb brushes her clitoris.

"You taste so good," He says with a tongue, which owes its sweetness to her cunt.

"Rick," Michonne gasps, and she wants to push his head away. Her senses are overwhelmed. "Oh…" The word stumbles from her lips. "Wait," She pleads. "Oh, fuck…" Michonne feels as the coil unfolds and expands like a fire nipping at every muscle of her body.

"Oh…" She has no better word.

Too stunned for a curse or blasphemy, Michonne stares at Rick. She tugs at his hair to pull him toward her, and she immediately kisses him when she can reach his lips.

It is something fiery far from the slowness, which started this moment. Michonne laches on a taste of herself. A small reminder that she has him. Michonne's finger pulls at the button on his jeans with ardour until it gives up. Her nail breaks while caught in his zipper. She does not care to undress all his body. She wants more _dick. _

Michonne lowers Rick's pants up to his ankle. She rubs his manhood for a second, and she quickly pulls it out. Michonne climbs further up on the couch, and she swiftly turns to be on four.

Rick pauses, and his hand runs on the curve of her spine. His fingertips brush Michonne's nape, and he grabs a fist full of her locks. The coarse and yet fluffy texture of her hair is unexpected comfort. Some details like the vanilla and mango scent of Michonne's hair jolt his memory.

Rick delicately thugs oh Michonne's hair until she arches her back into an angle borrowed from a renaissance painter. She has transcending curves, which Rick would be happy to immortalise for the posterity of beauty. The arch of her back stretches until turning into a curve meant for one to climb.

Rick's hand cups her breast. Michonne's skin glistens under the light. Her sweat coats his fingers. His tongue enjoys the new saltiness underlying Michonne's sweeter taste. Rick nibbles on her neck.

"I want you like this," Rick slaps Michonne's ass. She looks at him over her shoulder with a smile caught between shyness and actual naughtiness.

"Are you going to make me yours or?" Michonne asks with intent to have what she needs.

In her frenzy, she lines Rick's dick against her entrance. Her hand carefully guiding his manhood in her throbbing centre.

His tip pushes into her walls. Michonne steadies her hand. _Oh_, _God…_ She internally panics because her memories of Rick's size were fuzzy. _Long but not too long and surely not thiccck. _Now, Evelyn raised her to be an adventurous woman, but Rick Grimes' dick felt like she was taking on the exploration of Everest. _Ride or die with a new meaning. _Michonne has the oddest thought when Rick is only pushing his tip in and out of her.

"Oh god," Her hand reaches for his forearm.

"Come on baby, one more inch." Rick murmurs in her ear.

He runs his hand from her cunt to his dick to help with lubrication. Michonne draws a deep breath. _The price of a good dick_… She thinks as her cunt stretches to sheath Rick manhood. Rick stops moving, and Michonne feels full. She slowly twirls her waist to get more. Rick watches her move in a hesitant rhythm. He allows her cunt to reshape for him.

"Oh fuck," He swears when he almost spills his cum when Michonne deepens her whine. "Don't make me come yet," he leans with his weight on her back.

His breath caresses her heated skin. He slowly adjusts to her rhythm. Michonne moans are slowly more guttural. She pushes her ass on his crotch, and Rick bites into her shoulder.

Rick pulls out, and he draws a deep breath. He works his hand on his manhood. _Avocado...does it takes egg_s. Rick cannot believe he has to use lesser men's tricks.

"Pull it back," Michonne orders. "Oh fuck, pull it back, Rick." She switches to a more pleading tone.

Rick wraps his arm around her waist, and he lifts Michonne with almost ease.

"Open your legs," He whispers in the hole of her ear.

Michonne obeys, and Rick slides in her core with a thrust. Michonne's eyes close. _Oh…_ she has no time to recover as Rick begins to build a pace driving her insane.

"Oh," Michonne moans. "Oh, fuck." Her orgasm built in the third thrust. "Oh… oh fucking Lord." Michonne says when she falls from the edge into the crushing arm of la petite mort.

Michonne's climax has yet to unfold when Rick speeds his stroke. It is deeper, and she feels fuller. Michonne does not know what drives her crazy. His moans, which fill her ears, carry unadulterated passion. His steady breath in her neck reminds her that her body has melted into his. His raw cock pushing in and out of her cunt…._pause_! _Raw dick? _ Michonne's thoughts slam into her sexual fog.

Michonne looks down, and Rick's cock sheaths itself in her dripping cunt. _ His raw dick…_

"Did you double the condoms?" Michonne asks right when Rick gives her a long stroke. "Fuck," she moans because he hits her spot.

"What?" Rick asks in confusion.

"Condoms," Michonne almost twists a vertebra to look at her.

"Oh god," Rick moans because that move unexpectedly has Michonne's cunt squeezing his dick. "Condom?" He repeats while unable to process her words.

Michonne stops, and she rises and descends on Rick's dick. _Definitely, raw dick…_

Michonne stops moving, and Rick's dick remains sheathed in her.

"Pull out," Michonne reluctantly says. "Can we do this right?" She carefully pulls away from Rick's cunt. "We need condoms," Michonne tells Rick.

He blinks, and he looks down at his erected manhood. He ultimately understands what she means.

"Give me a minute," Rick kisses Michonne, and he rushes out of the living room.

A few minutes after Rick's departure while naked on his couch, Michonne's brain is recovering its function. _What are you doing? This is bad. How did it happen? _Michonne has to deal with a wave of difficult questions. _Why does she lose all functioning brain cells around Rick Grimes?_

* * *

Rick returns, and he had the same conflict. He returns into a set of sweat pants. They have come to the same decision. Michonne is fixing her dress back in place.

When Rick enters the room, Michonne jumps out of her skin.

"Were you planning a sneaky exit?" Rick asks.

Michonne pulls her hair up, and Rick almost reaches to help her. _Don't try that move twice? _Michonne thinks. She pushes her hair into a bun.

"No," Michonne genuinely answers. "I don't think we can talk while I'm naked, and you're hard." She pointedly looks at the tent pushing forward the fabric of his sweatpants.

_Of course, he has the male thot uniform big dick and sweatpants. _Michonne bites her lower lip after a few seconds staring at Rick's dick print.

"Where are we going to start?" Rick scratches his head. "Last night," He is uncertain on what should take priority. "Or tonight." Rick continues. "I cannot do any of that in this room. My mind wouldn't go anywhere productive. Presently, I'm single-minded." Rick admits. "I don't guarantee a sensible conversation."

Michonne sighs, and she is not better than Rick. The room smells like sex. Sex, which was better than anything she ever had, is fresh in her mind. Michonne has not satiated her craving. Perhaps, it is why she is craving him. _Dick might be the solution. _ Michonne thinks in a way that rests on desires, which she has begun to fulfil.

"Sit," Michonne tells Rick. "I'm going to deal with the consequences. I cannot be thinking of doing this over and over." She attempts to be rational.

"Sorry," Rick has a moment of confusion.

His usually beautiful brain is suffering from a sexual frenzy.

"Sit," Michonne says, " I need this, and you clearly need to get it out of your system too." She explains while she lifts the hem of her dress.

"I want to fuck you so bad." Michonne drags her panty down. "This is a resolution of conflict, and it sounds logical."

Rick blinks. Michonne makes it sound like a math equation to solve. Rick does not like it. However, beggars are not choosers. This is an onetime opportunity.

"I didn't find the condoms," Rick replies.

"Hit it raw and pull out," Michonne replies.

_Consequences…_ Michonne pushes the thought behind what drives her now. She unwisely wants Rick Grimes. Perhaps, tonight will solve the angst of the relationship. With the unresolved sexual tension gone, Rick and Michonne would be able to have normal interaction, or so she thinks.

"Sit, doctor Grimes." Michonne sensually asks.

Rick does as she asks, and he might have fallen for her use of his title. Michonne climbs on Rick laps, and she straddles him.

"I know what you like too," Michonne says as she drags her dress over her head.

Michonne sits naked on Rick's lap. The cotton grazes her cunt, and Rick's mouth covers her nipple. It does not feel like a bad idea for now.

Michonne pulls Rick's cock out, and she presses her chest against his chest until she can have all his length in her.

"Fuck me," Michonne passionately kisses Rick while moans spill from her mouth as he drives into her like a demented man.

Nothing feels enough. She wants it all. Michonne kisses Rick over and over. He fucks her until she has shaky legs. Michonne clings at his shoulders. Michonne climbs to and falls from another orgasm.

When Rick pulls out to empty himself, Michonne is breathless. She would not want another orgasm to rip through her.

Her body aches in the most comforting way. She lays her head on Rick's shoulder. Rick cradles Michonne. His limbs become a blanket for her.

"We are going to talk," Michonne tells Rick when she recovers. "I came here wanting to talk." She confesses as she returns to her senses.

"Any time, we definitely need to talk."

* * *

Anytime is two hours later. Michonne has taken a bath and said her goodbye to her panty. She should ask Rick Grimes for a refund.

Michonne returns to the living room, and she finds Rick offering her a glass of wine.

_Tonight, I did everything sober, and this walking sexpot wants me to interact with him while drinking. _ Michonne cannot believe Rick's audacity. She picks the glass, and she immediately drains it.

Rick curiously looks at Michonne, and he refills her glass.

"I don't have sex with the father of my children every night," Michonne offers as an excuse. "Then I have to think about a way to formulate how we handle the situation."

Rick sips from his glass. He is not as stressed as Michonne is. He, like Michonne, came to their conclusion when he went to search for a condom.

"It's a bad idea," Rick voices Michonne's thoughts. "Do I want to do this every day? I would love to, but it feels like we don't think it through. Baby number four was on its way." Rick admits.

"We don't need a casual affair right now." Michonne uses her brain. "Sex is messy. We have a complicated situation in our hands. We can't have casual sex because we're sexually attracted to each other." Michonne rambles.

_Fucking say, we are more. _She hopes, and Rick hesitates long enough to feed illusion to her heart.

"Sex between us is great," Rick downplays everything, but he only returns what he received from Michonne. "We needed this night. I got my nut…" He cringes at his poor choice of words. "You got yours too. We can move forward and forget the curiosity."

_Say it was more than scratching an itch. Give me something, Michonne._ Rick slightly pleads.

"Curiosity satisfied. Now, we focus on Carl, Judith, and RJ." Michonne yields her children like a shield.

_Only think of the children._

_The children come first._

Both Rick and Michonne have long decided in front of each other's reaction to what happened a few hours ago. The consequences are clear. Somehow, her mechanization of the sex reminded him why he left the hotel room with a bitter taste. Michonne wants sex. Rick does not like to see her reduce him to that part of him.

"The children," Rick repeats.

"They asked about you," Michonne gladly escapes the previous conversation. "Judith wanted to know what a daddy was. RJ asked where his dad was. Carl thought they were bad things in our lives." Michonne summarises. "This is what matters. I don't want to find ingenious ways to comfort them." Michonne laments.

"It's not my fault if I wasn't there at first. I want nothing more than to be part of their lives now. I…" Rick refrains from adding more to his claim.

He wants a family _with Michonne._ Rick feels unfortunate because he believes Michonne has no other interest beyond a sexual release.

"I can't blame you for your absence, and you can't blame me. We don't have to do that." Michonne overlooks her grievance. "I don't want to answer this question because I no longer have to lie. I told our children that you were on your way. It took time, but you are here now." Michonne looks at Rick, and she searches for confirmation.

"I'm here now," Rick replies with conviction.

Michonne takes a step away from Rick. She picks her shoes from the floor. She cannot look at the couch without thinking about how she opened the Pandora box.

"Tell me when you're ready to speak to them," Michonne says, and she pointedly looks at Rick. "RJ said daddy has a car, and so he is going to come fast." She paraphrases her son. "Are you ready, or do you need time? Our children aren't something like this." Michonne points at the couch where they had sex. "No mistake, we can't make any mistakes." Michonne is accidentally mean.

_Call me a mistake in my face. What did I expect the first time it ended as badly as tonight?_ Rick has to disregard Michonne's poor choice of words.

Michonne knows that she is overreacting. She wanted to reduce her need and interest toward Rick. The taste of regrets is bitter. She already chokes on the consequences. _What did you expect? Carry a torch for the man for almost a year. I built a fantasy of the perfect family with him at some point. How would sex erase it? _ Michonne lucidly faces the truth.

"I consider a few things sacred. Our children are now on top of that list. This is trading orgasm. It is not standard for anything." Rick replies, and it is a slap to Michonne. She grabs those words, and she decides to use them as a deterrent. "I'm not ready." Rick softly replies.

Michonne does not intend to argue. She begins to walk.

"I have to find a doctor for RJ then we can tell them I'm their dad. I need a bigger home, and I'm asking for a better work schedule." Rick clarifies why he is not ready.

"Why do you need to find a doctor for RJ?" Michonne disregards everything else.

"I can't be his doctor now, " Rick begins to explain, but Michonne stops him.

"You're the best. He doesn't need another doctor. He has you." Michonne argues.

Rick looks at her demeanour. He decides to talk about everything. Michonne's anger surfaces and some of it results from how rejected she feels.

"I'm one of the best, but in RJ's case, I'm not the best. I will find him a suitable physician."

_The selfish piece of trash_. Michonne draws a deep breath.

"No," Michonne refuses. "Everyone says you're the best. Did you know how hard it was to get an appointment with you? He is your son."

Rick draws a deep breath. The tension begins to suffocate him.

"He is my son. You said it yourself. I'm ethically unable to pursue it." Rick replies.

Michonne rolls her eyes. _Excuses. _Michonne bitterly thinks. She closes the distance between Rick and her.

"Why would you care for ethic? RJ is your son. Ethics don't matter." Michonne insists while her voice begins to rise.

"Do you get what my job encompasses? I…"

Michonne frustratedly cuts Rick. She does not want to hear his poor excuse.

_Bullshit_. She refrains from yelling at his face.

"Your job?" Michonne asks with annoyance. "Your fucking job is what you want to protect. You're right. You're not ready. Why did I believe you could be good at something you don't want to do?" Michonne's finger stabs Rick. "You told me. You didn't want them. I didn't believe you because silly me I didn't look past…" Michonne is too angry to pursue that topic.

"Can you let me explain? My job is…" Again, Michonne interrupts him.

"Your girlfriend. That brunette was right. You never met your children because you never wanted them. I did my best to find you. Each time, it was always the wrong man. Until the day, I found your address, that apartment, which is not too far from the hospital. I know it was you because she let me in the house, and I saw some pictures. I guess she saw Carl in my arms, and she knew who the father was." Michonne rants.

"What are you talking about, Michonne?" Rick attempts to understand.

Michonne is nothing but fury. She won't let him say a sentence without mistranslating it.

"Your brunette girlfriend," She replies. "I met her three years ago when I came looking for you. She told me how much you didn't want children. It was your job and nothing else. She said all those ugly things. I knew she was right. Why would you want children that came out of a condom's tear? Of course, she knew better. I sat there listening to her say vile things about my children. Things, which you would say too if I met you that day, hurt me so much. I didn't want to go through that mess. Mike had said enough for nine months. I didn't and couldn't risk it." Michonne explains. "Sadly, she was right. You don't care if your son dies."

Rick, who for a long minute remains quiet, attempts to control his anger. He is furious against Michonne. Lori, he is a second thought now. Those words are now falling from Michonne's mouth. She believes them without asking for an explanation. Michonne kept his children from him over something, which Rick can easily disprove. His anger is rightful, but it is the worst timing.

"You fucking needed an excuse not to share your children." Rick bluntly says. "You need an excuse to be selfish. You never met me beyond a hotel room. But let's believe I'm a shitty father because you can't fucking choose a decent man. Mike is a piece of shit, and so the guy who I paid to have sex with me is a piece of shit too. The logic is nowhere, Michonne." Rick retorts. "They are not your children only. They are mine too. I care for them. I love them as much as I believe I can love anyone. I don't fucking want my son to die. You don't have the right to say that shit because you're bitter I couldn't help you go through everything six years ago. You want to be selfish then say it with your chest or fucking listen to what I have to say."

Michonne cannot hide the hurt. Some of her pain comes from the veracity of her words. Michonne is resentful. She is angry he didn't make it to them. Michonne is furious for her misinterpretation of what he wants to say.

She will not listen even if he shouts until he blasts her eardrums. Most of the anger of now is the consequences of what sex unearthed between Rick and Michonne.

"Selfish," Michonne snorts, "I gave them everything. I wouldn't question if my son needs the best doctor. You're selfish, and you're as bad of a dad as someone who could care less to be one."

"Of course, you're perfect," Rick asks. "You're not shoving me out of their lives because you can't stand to share with me their love."

Michonne chuckles, and there is no humour to it.

Rick looks at her. He almost reaches for Michonne. He has an apology on the tip of his tongue. He would pick better words. Perhaps, it is how he wants to understand her anger. It might be because he has a grasp of his feelings for her when she is far from perfection, which he attaches to her. Michonne can be beautifully human when she shows the ugliness eating her at times.

"I can, and I'm asking you to stay away from Carl, Judith, and RJ or…" Michonne hesitates on her threats.

Anger nibbles at her mind. She thinks of reaching for Rick after a glimpse at his disappointed expression. However, he does not allow her to simmer. Michonne ignited Rick's anger.

"Or I could get the lawyers involved," Rick replies.

"Do what you want, but still stay away from my children."


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks for the reviews**

**I don't own the walking dead**

**Please review**

* * *

**Chapter VII**

* * *

_**3 years ago **_

_Be clear… tell him: look at this boy. He belongs to you. You can't deny it...well, he can. _Michonne's thoughts take a sombre turn.

_He might deny it with his last breath. Fuck, fuck, fuck_. _He is going to claim that we used condoms. He is going to throw it at my face. _Michonne begins to panic. She holds her breath to prevent an anxiety attack. Michonne opens her glove box. She takes the pill container, and she considers taking her medications.

_You're going to be drowsy. A deep breath…_ She returns the pills container in her glove box. She attempts to control her growing panic.

Michonne stares at the complex building before her. She pulls the small file, which the private investigator gave her. She reads the address to confirm, and Michonne is at the right place.

_I can't go back. The fuck, you can. How do you think he will react? How did you react? Three weeks...fuck three weeks._ Michonne thinks with bitterness and shame. She wipes the sweat from her forehead.

Michonne feels as if she will suffocate if she continues to think. She finally has a slippery grip on motherhood. Months ago, she even began to enjoy it.

She refuses to dwell on old wrongs, but the present circumstances bring worth those traumatic days. Her heart is lighter now, but for months, it bled nothing but hatred and desperation. Michonne loves her children, and she can be a mother.

However, Michonne did not always feel that way. Some morning, she is unsure of how she feels about motherhood. The excitement post-pregnancy quickly turned into months of turmoil.

She shakes her head.

Michonne does not want to think about those dark times.

The shame and guilt threaten to swallow her.

Michonne looks at Carl on the back seat. Everything always felt harder once looking at her son. With Carl, Michonne had to go the extra mile. From head to toes, he looks like the biggest mistake of her life.

_It's not going to be like that. I got it together… after a long time. Had to go through therapy. Why will he want them? I love them now...I always did. Well, he won't like them._ Her mind darkens her fears.

Michonne looks away from Carl, and she draws a deep breath. She needs not to project her past emotions. She moved on, and she loves her children. She always did, but at one point, she fought her demons.

_Drive away. Drive away. Do what you couldn't do at the adoption agency. Drive away and don't look back. He doesn't want your children. You didn't want them. Mike didn't want them. Drive away. Drive away. _

Michonne draws a deep breath. She attempts to push down those horrid thoughts. She chose to keep her children.

She chose them at the adoption agency.

Perhaps, Rick is better than she was a month after the birth or thirteen months after the pregnancy. He might be better and wiser than she was a year after giving birth. He is going to want to be their father. Rick will not drown in depression and psychosis.

_Drive away! What do you want? That mess with Mike was not enough. He is going to make you hate your kids over again. Rick is going to tell you the same things, which made you hate your babies. _

Michonne grabs the file again. Rick Grimes sounds like a good man. He is not going to blame her for pregnancy while being as responsible as she is. His orgasm is the reason why she was pregnant.

Michonne feels sick. The nine months of her pregnancy were the worst of her life. She did not have a minute to enjoy it because Mike harassed her. Michonne can still hear his cruel words. Now, they mean nothing, but during her pregnancy, it crushed her.

The happiness, which she felt looking at her children, could not heal those scars. Michonne does not know if everything healed.

_He is not Mike. Rick Grimes isn't me as well. Please...please, let him be the better parent. Oh god, let it be love at first sight. They deserve a decent parent. _

Michonne looks in the front rearview. Sometimes, she feels shame for how long it took before she admits that she loved her children. The therapy is long behind her. She is a good mother. She loves her children. The anxiety to see it all disappear clings to her mind.

One day, she might wake up and stop loving her children. The thought haunts her.

_Rick Grimes is a good man. He is going to want them_.

Michonne shoves her doubts away. She checks her appearance, and she does not look frightened. She wipes the tears in the corner of her eyes. Michonne climbs off the car, and she picks Carl from the baby car seat.

"Let's go meet your dad," Michonne says with determination. "He's going to love you." She kisses Carl's forehead, and he grabs Michonne's face to kiss her too.

* * *

_Hello, I don't know if you remember me. Well, we had sex. I paid for it. I paid you a lot of money for it. My friend and my mother did… stop, stop and just stop_. Michonne ends her rumbling.

She waits for the door to open finally. Michonne has been knocking for the last fifteen minutes, and she is a thought away from convincing herself to leave.

"Mama, look." Carl draws her attention on his fingers.

"That's good, baby," Michonne mindlessly replies.

Michonne adjusts Carl on her hips. She will find her words when he opens the door. She continues to knock until the door opens.

"Hello," Michonne stutters, and she looks at the woman before her.

"Hello," Carl happily repeats.

"Hello," She sounds extremely displeased. "Can I help you?"

Michonne draws a deep breath. She might have the wrong address.

"Does Rick Grimes live here?" Michonne asks.

The brunette woman looks at Michonne. The stare is long and judging.

"He does," She replies. "Do come in," she moves away from the door.

"Frick Rimes." Carl proudly tells his mother.

"Please, come in," The other woman insists.

Michonne hesitates, and _this is weird_. She begins to think. The granted entrance to Rick's home came too easily. She looks around the furnished apartment, and the framed pictures confirm the house's owner.

Her anxiety grows, and she expectantly looks around the apartment. Rick is nowhere in sight. The long seconds of silence stretch until they become unbearable minutes.

"Is Rick around?" Michonne dares to ask.

Rick's girlfriend ignores Michonne, and she stares at the grumpy little boy seated by Michonne.

"Home," Carl asks while he pulls Michonne's sleeves.

"Baby, stop please," Michonne softly says.

Michonne finds eyes on her. With each second, she is more uncomfortable. _Carl is right. Go home and forget this shit._

"I'm Lori," She says after a pregnant pause. "I'm Rick soon to be wife."

_Fiancé will be shorter to say_. Michonne refrains from vocalising it.

"Michonne Barnes," She calmly replies. "I would like to see your fiancé," Michonne emphasizes the last word.

Lori smiles, and she wipes her hands on her pants.

"Do you want child support?" Lori bluntly asks, and her sweet smile remains glued on her lips.

Michonne blinks, and she lacks words for a second. She never expected the bluntness.

"Could I meet Rick Grime?" Michonne repeats because she must have wrongly worded her need.

"He is not here, and you shouldn't bother returning to meet him." Lori replies, "It will be a waste of time." She continues. "Get your lawyers ready and try to get that child support. That is what you want. Of course…" She scornfully eyes Michonne.

_The fuck_… Michonne has to reconcile the scenario in her mind and the present event.

"There is a misunderstanding." Michonne stands, and she takes Carl's hand. "Have a good day." She adds on her way out. "I will return when Rick is present."

Lori stands, and she puts herself between Michonne and the exit. _What in the Mexican telenovela is going on now? This is how people finish in jail. _She draws a deep breath, and she attempts to bypass Lori.

"Let me guess," Lori begins to speak, and Michonne forcefully moves Lori out of her way. "You paid for the sex and got the bastard as an undesirable bonus." Lori spits.

Michonne refuses to look behind, and she decides to ignore Lori. However, the choice of words brushes what used to be the virulent assault of her thoughts a year ago.

"Another unsatisfied slut," Lori adds, and Michonne only hears Mike's thought echo through her words.

"Let me save you the trouble," Lori calls back Michonne. "You will be lucky to get a few bucks for the bastard. I will make sure you have nothing." She pursues her rant. "Rick will want nothing to do with him. Children are not his thing. Even less one resulting from the sperm that a cum rag should have wiped, and your greedy ass wants money out of it."

_Fuck it…_

Michonne stops walking, and she returns to face Lori.

"Pardon?" Michonne asks.

Lori does not flinch, and she looks into Michonne's eyes. Her mocking smile stretches until her ears.

"If you care for your undesired bastard, save him the humiliation." Lori deadpans. "Like you, I have seen many sluts come around and get for something. You got it over your head that he meant the shit he told you after you spent five thousand dollars on him. I'm certain Rick doesn't remember your name, when he fucked you, or how he did it." She insists. "Now, your little bastard is the last thing, which he wants. Rick isn't going to care. He might throw some change your way, and so you can leave us alone. He is going to play daddy dearest or let you eat of him. He is going to remind you that he fucked you because you paid, and you should deal with the consequences. So do you want child support?" Lori finishes.

Lori's words are a torrent of vicious hatred. Michonne will overlook them if she never wore those shoes. If her first week postpartum were perfect, Michonne slowly plunged into a circle of resentment.

What Lori spat at her is an echo of the past. Unfortunately, the wounds have only begun to heal. Her anxiety pills are in the glove box, and her therapist is a call away.

Michonne has no verbal response for Lori. Without hesitation, she slams her hand in Lori's face.

"You can keep the money," Michonne replies. "Call my son out of his name again, and I will happily go to jail for murdering your stupid self." She threatens.

Carl escapes his mother's grip, and he runs to Lori's legs. Aware of the conflict, the two-year-old little boy attempts to defend his mother. He sinks his teeth in Lori's calf.

"Carl," Michonne calls him. "Don't bite people. Even the trash one."

Michonne takes Carl in her arms, and she walks away without a glance at Lori. However, her mind dwells on Lori's words for too many days. She ultimately internalized those words. She panics, and she does not want the past to resurface. Ultimately, Michonne decides to forget Rick Grimes.

* * *

"If you can't be adults, don't fuck," Sasha repeats for a second time. "Is that dick crack because you sure acted like a crackhead." She deadpans.

Michonne sighs, and she begins to regret her decision. She should have never retold last night to Sasha. An attempt to get support has turned into an hour-long lecture.

"On what side are you?" Michonne petulantly asks.

Sasha rolls her eyes, and she begins to tie her hair into a bun. She grabs her glass of wine. Sasha attempts to massage her building headache away.

"If you have to ask, it's not yours, Barnes," Sasha states. "I'm also not on his side. You are both fools with no interests beyond who come first. I swear you're clowns." Sasha doubles down on her statement.

Michonne draws a deep breath, and she cannot argue with the truth. She sighs, and she picks the glass of wine out Sasha's hand.

"I have the right to be mad," Michonne argues.

"Did he force you to climb that dick? How are you going to raw doggy him and then be mad because you raw doggy him? Barnes, you started the conflict." Sasha challenges Michonne.

"Oh shut up, Williams," Michonne replies. "You know why I'm mad at him." She corrects her best friend. "The sex is fine. It's not the reason."

Sasha gulps the wine bottle. There is no chance to solve any issue tonight. She throws a mask at Michonne, and she applies one on her face.

"Are you going to play dumb? I'm not playing the dumb card with you." Sasha states. "What did that man say, which was so bad?" She questions Michonne. "You had to brandish your children as you're got you card?" She inquires.

Michonne drains the wine glass. She does not bother to answer the question. She is aware of the lines, which she crossed. She carefully applies the mask on her face.

"I didn't mean it," Michonne confesses. "I got mad, and I tried to play his game."

"Hmmm…" Sasha is sceptical. "I love you Barnes, but this is a sixty-forty situation. Sixty of the bullshit came from you." She deadpans.

_No loyalty with this woman_. Michonne thinks bitterly. She admits that the situation escaped her control.

"Did you miss the part where he said our son can die in the hand of a less qualified doctor?" Michonne attempts to defend herself. "The children are priorities." She insists. "He doesn't understand that."

Sasha draws a deep breath, and she hates when Michonne finds refuge in the extreme. She comes to lie on the bed. She turns on her stomach to face her best friend.

"All I heard was that you had sex. You liked it. You're at some level in love with that man. He wants sex. You want more, and you found no other way to express it than to leverage your children." Sasha is painfully truthful. "I take back everything I said about you having sex with that man in particular. How do you go from being an intelligent woman to if you don't want me, I'm making everyone miserable?" She laments. "You're immature people with children."

Michonne refills her glass, and she sighs. _Oh, the birds' behaviours_. She admits with great regrets.

"I didn't mean half of what I said. It built up too fast. One minute everything was fine, and the next, he is all about himself. His ethics here and his job there. What about RJ? He sounded like…" Michonne stands, and she leaves the room.

Sasha draws a deep breath, and she drags herself out of bed. They reach a wall, which stands to protect Michonne.

"Barnes," Sasha knocks at the bathroom. "I'm partially sorry." She softly says. "Open the door, please." She continues. "This door is too heavy to break. You know I will try and break a shoulder for you." Sasha insists.

"I'm good, Williams." Michonne retorts. "I need a minute."

"You need to talk about it," Sasha counters. "You let it get the best of you once, and it took three years before you met him again. Chonne, climb in the bathtub. I'm going to break the bathroom door. "She seriously says.

"Don't try that shit, Sasha," Michonne drags the door open, "you aren't going to pay to fix it." She complains.

Sasha smiles, and she wraps her arms around Michonne. She delicately holds her best friend in her arms.

"The situation is the same," Michonne says after a minute. "He woke up with three children, and I understand it. I was in that position. It felt weird. For nine months, I thought it would be over soon. I thought when I would see them, I would fall in love, and it would work out. I did, and it was not enough." Michonne inhales, and she ultimately reaches for the wine bottle.

"I was shitty. I didn't put them above everything else. I don't need this situation to happen with the other parent. Now, RJ, Carl, and Judith can understand when they don't receive the love, which they deserve. It's my responsibility to keep my children sheltered. What happens if he loves the kids today, and he stops for no reason? I was so shitty."

Michonne drains her glass, and she immediately refills it. Talking about that time makes her sick.

"You weren't shitty," Sasha corrects. "You suffered from depression. It happens to many new mothers, and seeing how that pregnancy came to be and the months through it, you had reasons. What Mike did to you is unforgivable. You don't bully a pregnant woman and humiliate her day in day out." She clarifies.

Michonne remains sceptical. She always refuses to find refuge in _excuses. _Mike mentally abused her for months. He manipulated her. Later, he tried his best to gain revenge over a perceived hurt.

"I didn't need his help to plan their adoption. I know what I thought that first year. It felt like a punishment. I couldn't touch them. I couldn't look at Carl because he resembles the man who ruined my life. Perfect I was pregnant by the ex who I hated, and then I could not get the father right. When all I heard from Rick's mouth was his job and many shits about him, I couldn't help it. I saw myself letting you and mom dot on my children. I saw myself, and I wanted to protect them from me, from him, and Mike." Michonne confesses.

"Stop putting words in that man's mouth. You should have walked away and cleared the post-dick feelings. I love you, Michonne, but you cannot spend your life projecting your fears on Rick." Sasha hits the heart of the problem.

"You did it before meeting him. You did it when that bitch told you off. Now, you overlooked his explanation. You didn't ask him what he meant. Even fools have a conversation and listen. I know it might be hard, but it is about neither of you. You want to be messy and have great sex. You're adults, and no one climaxes with you. Certainly not your children, and so I need you and your baby daddy to get it together." Sasha insists. "If one of those babies begins to cry about wanting to see Doctor Richard, you're going to swallow your pride and drive them to him. So can we be adults and stop threatening people with means we do not have?" Sasha inquires.

"It is not as simple as you make it sound," Michonne argues without convictions. "Yes, I wouldn't keep the children away from him. I gave him an out. He could stay away."

Sasha gulps the wine, and she smacks the back of Michonne's head. Listening to her best friend only confirms that Michonne and Rick are acting on impulse.

"He told you fuck you," Sasha crudely says. "He said see you in court. He does not need a way out. He wants a way in, and you need to move out of his way. This is unnecessarily ugly. I get it you're mad. He doesn't want your fine ass. Fuck his best friend and move on. I repeat both of you need to be adults. Go to a lawyer and work something. Leave my nephews and niece out of your games. You want him to stay away from you. That is easy. Stay away from Rick Grimes. Get a lawyer and have something drawn for the children's sake." She finishes with a sigh.

Michonne searches for the flow on Sasha's logics. There is none, and she has to admit RJ, Carl, and Judith are not hers to monopolize.

"You told me to have sex with him," Michonne laments. "You walked me to the altar. You sacrificed me to that dick. Now, you want to be the smart one."

Sasha laughs, and she knows Michonne has pushed down her ego.

"Babe, you went to that man's house at night. You wanted it. You got it. Wear your big girl pants and get over him. I could set you up with a rebound dick." Sasha finds a way to return to lighter subjects.

"So I can fail to get over Rick because I compare him to the wrong man. You're right, Williams. I might be projecting. I might be fifty-five per cent of the problem because, without his smart mouth, I wouldn't have said half of the stupidities that I said." Michonne argues.

"Here, we go again. I hate this man." Sasha declares.

"I cannot be a selfish bitch, and you're right. He doesn't want me. He has no taste. I hate his gut right now because he is fucking perfect as a father. Okay, I'm jealous. I worked hard to be this good at motherhood, and look at the mistakes, which I make. He comes in and effortlessly he wants to be a father." Michonne rants. "He does not have nightmares. He cares for them. I didn't know how to do that. I couldn't do that. I was suffering."

Sasha quietly listens to Michonne emptying years of accumulated regrets.

"I'm salty. I'm mad at him. Looking at him is endless hours wondering how better would have been my pregnancy with him by my side. His dumbass doesn't know the shit I had to deal with because he took his name off a website. How dare he says I'm selfish? Every single day, I had to argue with Mike. I wanted them to have a father so bad that at the end Carl, Judith, and RJ had a broken mother. I will be stupid if I took that risk again." Michonne wipes the tears before they fall. "Yes, I attacked before I listened because the last time I did, it fucked with my head. I clung to those ideas. I didn't want to be pregnant. I didn't want to go for the ultrasound with Mike claiming that I did it to trap him. I didn't want to hear all the vile shit he said about my children. However, I listened. I made those thoughts mine. You know why I don't listen when I don't like what I hear."

Sasha quietly nods. If she could put her hand on Rick Grimes, she would smack the back of his head for accidentally unleashing old demons upon Michonne.

"You know how badly I wanted them to have a father. I'm not selfish. I share Carl, Judith, and RJ's love with whoever deserves it. Anyone deserved it more than I did at one point. I only need him to do it right." She finishes out of breath. "There is no time for trial and errors. I exhausted those options. I'm scared to do more damage. And shit, I still end up being the worthless mother. The selfish bitch brandishing her kids to hurt someone."

Sasha drags Michonne in a hug, and she rests her chin on the crown of Michonne's forehead.

"First, Rick is not Mike. Give him space to grow before you judge and condemn him. Is he dumb? Yes, he is an idiot for many reasons. However, you never once said he is a shitty dad. I say draw the lines." Sasha softly says. "You're nothing but amazing with your children."

Michonne nods, and she tightens her hold around Sasha.

"I fucked this up, Williams. We fucked it up."

* * *

Shane is minutes away from throwing Rick over the balcony. _Crack_, Shane does not have anything else to blame.

"Three children," Shane has to remind Rick, "and the adults find a way to blow their post-orgasm feeling out of proportion." He sighs. "You robbed me from the opportunity to hail you over smashing sexy Michonne not once but twice. If you want to play with your adult toys, be mature. "

Rick rolls his eyes, and he takes a sip of his beer. He is exhausted. Michonne left him in a chaotic state. Rick is angry and disappointed. A series of doubts plague him. He has no patience to deal with his best friend.

"The sex is not the issue," Rick argues.

"It's the core of the issue. It gave you three children. You get it up every time she is around. Richard, sex is the problem." Shane counters. "Every time you have sex with Michonne, your feelings get irremediably hurt. You do something stupid like telling her that you want a custody battle." He pointedly says.

"Don't twist it," Rick defends himself, "I wouldn't have said shit if she didn't ask me to stay away from my children."

Shane chuckles, and he smacks the back of Rick's head. He feels calmer after expressing his frustration. _Dealing with fools at my old age._ Shane laments.

"Is Michonne a bad mom?" Shane inquires.

Rick blinks, and he does not see the relevance of the question.

"Your point?" Rick asks.

"The one you're trying to avoid because it makes you look like a dumbass." Shane deadpans. "Is Michonne a bad mom?"

"No," Rick replies without hesitation. "She is great. She is super patient with them. She gets each of Carl, Judith, and RJ's quirks so well. I mean you should have seen how she put them to sleep. She is an amazing mother."

_Lost causes… here, I have become Saint Therese._ Shane thinks with amusement. Rick never talked with such awe of Lori or any woman. He is furious at Michonne, and he makes an ode to her.

"She bluffed because you cornered her. She knows it. You understood it. Carl, Judith, and RJ won't suffer from her hand. Your kids adore you. She is a good mother, and you knew she was bluffing." Shane points out. "You got her mad, and she reacted. She hurt your feelings, and you reacted."

Rick quietly admits his faults. He could have attempted to stop the conflict. Rick might have looked for the conflict because it meant more than sex for a few minutes.

"Walk in her shoes for a few seconds," Shane stops Rick's counter-argument. "She has been the only parent for years. She slowly allows you in when she is uncertain of the future of her family. Don't use the doctor logic. You can't be RJ's doctor because emotions will compromise your work. Feelings will cloud your judgement." He doubles down with a driven point.

"Michonne is dealing with the same shit. She fucking trusts you. In her mind, you're RJ's father. You will lose as much as she does. RJ is your son. You love him. He isn't scared around you. Hospital is no longer hell for him. She does not have to see him go through more suffering because he has you doting over him. Michonne does not have to lose her sanity because she is not alone. She has you there with her," He continues. "And then you reject her because she rejected you. Do you hear the headassry of that sentence? Fucking speak your mind, Grimes." Shane laments. "You wanted to hurt her. You said what you said about stopping being RJ's doctor because you wanted to say to Michonne, take me all, or get nothing." Shane points out. "You couldn't take off the sex from the table. You can't get rid of what works well to salvage what you're afraid to see disappear."

"I can't be RJ's doctor," Rick retorts. "I'm his father. I will remain his father." He insists. "We won't fuck again in case you miss it."

Shane laughs because he understands Rick's attempt to be obtuse.

"I sucked at ethics, but I know the basics," Shane reminds Rick. "I understand pettiness and diplomacy too. Your ego blurted out that statement. It was not the time. You knew Michonne wasn't in the mindset to listen. You read people too well to miss the signs. She hurt your feelings, and you poked her in retaliation. She retaliated, and you had to react. If only you could use that energy to say what you need to say, I wouldn't have to play counsellor. Your brain stops working over her pussy. Of course, you're going to go back." Shane chuckles. "Three fucking children and you have the time to be petty. If you can't handle the aftermath, stop fucking her."

"You're oversimplifying the situation." Rick stands by his actions.

"How about keeping your dick away from your baby mama until you don't take your children on hostage." Shane smiles. "Simple and needed solution."

Rick scratches his head. Where does he begin?

"I think Michonne didn't come to me because she didn't want the father of her children to be a gigolo. She was glad to have the proper Mike as the father of her children. I'm furious she let another man experience fatherhood. Another man saw my children's ultrasound. Another man sat and offered names for my children." Rick ultimately speaks of his frustration. "She let another man have my family. She allows another man to do what I should have done. Yet, she continues to refuse to let me in her life."

Shane goes to the bar, and he returns with cognac. Beer will not cut it when Rick begins to dig in his wounds.

"I feel robbed," Rick explains. "I don't want to point fingers, but they always end on Michonne. She kept me away from my children for the same reason why I wasn't good enough for her. She continues to do it." He gulps the cognac. "You're right. I knew she wouldn't keep Carl, Judith, and RJ from me. I lost it because what Michonne meant to say was stay away from me. She finds a way to end the night with that shit every time. When it is not a tip, she has to use the children. She does not want me for more than an onetime fuck, and it drives me insane. I can't get rid of that frustration. I didn't mean half of the shit I said. She wouldn't hurt our children, but it is a different story with me." Rick laments.

Shane shakes his head. _Conversations_ are harder to have than sex. He thinks with exhaustion.

"Michonne wants me to stay away from her. I will do that." Rick says with determination. "But I want my kids. She will deal with that shit."

* * *

Rick is going to kill him. Shane has already concluded. However, he will learn to mind his business when it does not involve his best friend and his newly found adorable nephews.

Shane confirms the address, which he coerced out of Beth, and he steps out of the car. He is freshly out of a morning shift, and he_ needs to mind his business._ Shane thinks, but the thought does not stop him.

Shane stops before the door, and he knocks. The door opens after a few seconds, and she does not look at him.

"Here," She pushes a note toward him. "Carl, don't cry." She looks over her shoulder.

"No one has tipped me in years," Shane says as he takes the note.

"What?" Sasha turns to face the delivery guy, "Are you coming with the pizza?" She asks with an unfazed expression.

_Don't pull a Rick here...Don't be a stuttering idiot._

Shane tells himself. He relaxes in a matter of seconds.

"If you had passed me a call asking for it, I would have." He smirks, "but here we're. Just me alone keeping the twenty dollars." He teases.

Sasha rolls her eyes, and she looks over Shane's shoulder to check for the delivery guy. There is no one, and she focuses on Shane.

"When I get your number, I will pass you a call." Sasha retorts.

_Rick Grimes… _Shane smartly concludes why Michonne forgot to give his number to Sasha.

"I was two steps ahead, and I gave my number to Michonne two nights ago. I took the time to write it, and I gave you my beeper." Shane clarifies.

_Rick Grimes and his dick…_ Sasha bitterly thinks.

"Beeper?" Sasha asks with amusement.

"The level of dedication is unmatched," Shane laughs.

Sasha shakes her head, and she knows a smooth talker when she meets one. Sasha does not care much, and she wants to fuck this one out of her bucket list.

"Michonne is not here, and tell your friend to come to talk to her himself," Sasha says when it becomes obvious that the pleasantries have ended.

Shane cocks an eyebrow, and he might have found a match on the level of bluntness.

"She fucked him up," Shane retorts. "If Rick Grimes meets Michonne in the current days, he is going to put his foot in his mouth." He clarifies.

Sasha rolls her eyes, and she moves away from the door. Shane follows her, and they stop in the living room where Rick's doppelgangers play.

"Uncle Shane," Carl and RJ say with delight.

The little boys run toward him, and Shane has a second of confusion. Sasha presses his shoulder to push him down on his knees.

"Hug them before it turns into tears and bitterness because you rejected their love and affection." Sasha mumbles.

"Like father like son." Shane deadpans.

Shane does as she asked, and he squeezes RJ and Carl in a hug. They twist and giggle. _Oh, these little demons are adorable. _

"Now, let them go." Sasha guides Shane.

Shane does it, and he rises to his full height. RJ and Carl return to their toys.

"Go say hi to Judith," Sasha slightly pushes Shane's forward.

Shane looks at Rick's daughter, and the uncanny resemblance with Rick's father is frightening.

"Hello," Shane hesitantly says.

"Hello," Judith waves her hand before Shane.

"I'm Uncle Shane. I'm boy aunty Sasha." He explains as he did for her brother.

"Nice to meet you, boy aunty Sasha." She politely says with a small laugh at the end of her statement.

"She is my favourite," Shane declares as he returns to stand near Sasha.

"Let me guess," Sasha laughs, "You're going to turn her in a daddy's girl."

"If Michonne allows Rick near them, he is going to do just that." Shane agrees.

Sasha looks at Shane, and she smiles a little.

"He picked you as a mediator?" Sasha inquires.

"More like I can't mint my business, and Rick Grimes is stubborn. By the time he gets over this shit, he will make me lose my mind."

Sasha offers a seat to Shane, and she moves out of the living room when the doorbell rings. Shane follows her.

"Here, " He passes the twenty dollars, which he took from Sasha.

…

….

…

"They shouldn't have fucked," Shane says after finishing the slice of pizza, which Sasha forced him to take.

_A yes man. _Shane concludes that he knows a single word around Sasha.

"Children," Sasha reminds him. "They are going to repeat those words, and Michonne is going to lose it."

"This uncle shit…" He stops at Sasha's glare. "Let me reset my mind into the kid-friendly version."

"So," Sasha asks when she finishes. "What made you come around here to play counsellor?"

"Oh you're brutally honest," Shane announces. "You could have been kinder in the way to ask." He points out.

Sasha rolls her eyes. _Stalling and marinating his bullshit._ She rightfully thinks.

"You're stalling," Sasha confirms Shane's claim with another display of bluntness.

Shane scratches his head, and he elects the truth.

"I didn't have a well-thought plan. Look, I love Rick, but your friend is driving him crazy. I mean she has a history of doing that, but this is on another scale." He explains further, and he stops after glancing at three pairs of ears very interested in the conversation.

"Kitchen," Sasha stands.

Shane happily follows her. He slows his step to enjoy the view. If he is taking one for the team, he might as well enjoy the sweet cause of his death.

Sasha opens the fridge, and she grabs two bottles of beer. She pushes one before Shane, and she gives up on drinking her beer after the bitter taste of the first gulp.

"I' m going to listen, but I don't agree." Sasha clarifies before Shane can say another word. "Then you will agree to mind your business." She finishes with a stern expression.

Shane cocks an eyebrow. _Here, you had to go get a dominatrix. _

"So we're gossiping," Shane points out. "We're burning great relationship steps. This is a commitment, sweetheart." He teases with an ounce of seriousness.

"Gossiping?" Sasha grabs a wine bottle, "Nah, I'm helping you vent your frustration before you go and ruin your best friend's chance with my best friend. I'm doing charity." She deadpans.

Sasha extends the wine bottle to Shane because she fails to pull the cock out.

"Efficient communication," Shane's finger travels between Sasha and himself. "Your best friend and my best friend can't pull that. Now, I wouldn't care much if it didn't get so bad. He didn't have to push certain ideas. "He sighs," She dragged him in the mud because a pig fight was easy."

Shane looks at Sasha, and she reluctantly returns the courtesy.

"I'm going to play the devil advocate and say one thing. Your best friend needs to understand that Michonne overcompensates for his absence. She does not know where to fit him in her life and most of her life is the triplet. Tell him to appeal to her logical side. If he disrupts her emotional balance, she is going to do what she did two nights ago." Sasha shares.

"If we are trading advice, I have one too. The last thing, which she needs to worry about Rick, is loyalty. Michonne got herself a good partner to handle the situation with RJ. He isn't going to leave her in the cold. If she needs a pillar and someone who understands how much pain she feels, she needs to let Rick in that part of her life. I know he hasn't shown Michonne any sign that he is scared for RJ, but he is terrified. I don't and can't understand what comfort he needs because I don't have a son with cancer. She does, and she needs the same amount of comfort. Tell your best friend to stop fucking with my best friend's head. I will tell my best friend to stop miscommunicating." Shane offers a deal.

"You don't know how to mind your business. They will figure it out." Sasha replies. "I can't believe I'm doing this with you. If he didn't handle her like a warm pussy for the night, Michonne wouldn't have any problem." She reluctantly agrees to gossip. "They shouldn't have fucked."

Shane laughs because Rick and Michonne have successfully made a mess of a non-existent issue.

"Nah, they should have worked on their communication before bumping uglies. They don't gossip together about their best friends." He points out. "These two have selective hearing and a questionable understanding of the situation."

Sasha cannot argue with the last statement. However, she can argue about the beginning.

"Nah, your friend dick has an unexpected effect on Michonne," Sasha argues.

"Besides getting her pregnant of triplets," Shane doubles down.

Sasha laughs, and she finishes the wine in her glass.

"I said no gossip," She chuckles.

"We're working on communication," Shane deadpans.

"Oh god," Sasha sighs. "I'm not taking the risk to act crazy too." She retorts. _Gigolo dick and the power of dickmatization are above me. _She almost adds to her argument.

"Italian or French?" Shane proceeds to ask. "Forget it; you're too fancy to want the cliché. I know a family own Czech restaurant." He corrects himself.

Sasha searches for an adequate way to deny his invitation. He stares at her while he slowly sips his beer. _Michonne fuckery has everyone caught in the crossfire. _Sasha could easily see the problem ahead. She could write a book about the danger of a reformed gigolo. Michonne has given her enough material for a series.

"How good are the sausages?" Sasha hesitantly inquires.

"You will find out Friday… wait," Shane pulls out his phone, and he begins to go through his weekly schedule. "Thursday? I have a surgery scheduled on Wednesday, and I have an ER shift on Friday." He looks at Sasha, and he waits for her answer.

Sasha blinks as he is merely telling her the day as a formality.

"I'm going on a date with you on a Thursday?" She repeats.

"Seven p.m. or eight p.m.," Shane confirms Sasha's suspicion.

"Oh, I didn't hear myself agree," Sasha points out.

"I didn't hear you say no," Shane counters.

Sasha opens her mouth, and she closes it because _birds of the same feathers flock together. I'm revoking my right to say shit to Michonne._ She sadly accepts her failures to uphold common sense.

"Eight pm and send me the address." Sasha gives into Shane's request.

"The perks of communication," Shane points out. "You know what I want, and I know what you want." He smirks.

"And what do you want?" Sasha challenges.

"You," He responds without missing a bit. "Now that it is clear." He walks to the other side of the kitchen island. "You can do whatever you want with the information." He bends and kisses her cheek. "Have a good day, Aunty Sasha."

Sasha stutters while she attempts to reply. _The audacity_… _How are you going to disrupt the course of my day by making me think about sex, and tell me to have a good day? _Sasha cannot fathom the thinking process of Shane. She indeed allows her mind to go where he wants her to go.

"Go home, Uncle Shane," Sasha replies. "Rick and Michonne will be fine as long as we both mind our businesses. When she is ready, she will come to him."

* * *

Rick opens the door, and he faces the last person, which he wants to see. Lori stares at Rick. She had lost all hope after knocking for so long.

"Hi, Lori," Rick says while he moves away from the door.

"You're not picking my calls," She replies.

Rick sighs, and he has had the two worst days of his life. Besides work, he does not know what to do of himself. He knows what he wants. _Michonne and our children. _The thought crushes his bleeding heart.

Rick does not count the number of times when he had to erase an apology message. _She started this mess, and I want to apologize. _He thinks while his resolve to hold his position weakens. _We were both wrong._ He admits now with the distance.

"Are you listening to me, Rick?" Lori asks when he does not react to her compelling case.

"I'm tired," Rick announces. "My heart is crushed, and so I'm not listening. It's like the calls. I'm filtering," He casually replies.

Lori is a poor victim of Rick's frustration. He is in no mood to entertain the last thing, which he cares about now. _Now? I never cared if I'm being truthful_. Facing all the changes, which he is willing to make to accommodate his children and Michonne, Rick has to admit that Lori was a meaningless part of his life. He used her, as a fill-in for what he felt needed to exist.

_Shane is right. Six_ years _with _no_ memory of her and I manage to trap myself in the dollar store version of the life I wanted with her_.

Rick can only think about what drove him to jump into a relationship with Lori. He only saw the acceptance of his past.

"I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you, Rick." Lori furiously retorts. "I'm trying hard to give you a chance to fix what you broke. I'm coming to you when you should be grovelling to me."

Rick looks at Lori. He does not know why he pushed through all those years. Was she always this self-centred woman? Rick would not know. He never stopped to look at her. She stood in for the woman, who he wanted and still wanted despite how ugly it got two nights ago.

In some manner, he never wanted to care for Lori. She could not reject him. She could not hurt him. Lori was and remained a safe choice. Despite his best efforts, she would not shield him from the chaos Michonne causes in his mind. Lori would not keep him away from the happiness, which he gets out of his family. _I fucked up...we fucked up_. Rick quietly admits.

"I fix what I broke by leaving you, Lori. If I had cared enough for you, I would be a broken man." He replies. "Before you pull the Gigolo card, I will tell you now you'll waste your time. I certainly have insecurities from my past, but those insecurities do not stand now. Not out of your mouth and mostly not when it makes me risk everything I want and need." He continues while he admits how poorly he handled the situation with Michonne.

"You're full of shit," Lori yells. "So what now you're too good for me. The man who is too broken to have children. You, Rick Grimes, are too good for me. Who will put up with your bullshit of not wanting a family and delaying a wedding for years?"

"Any other gold digger happy to live off my big salary. Any other psychopath who can lie to the mother of my children. Like you Lori, there is a dozen a dime. Trash usually lies on the floor. I picked you, and so, I should know." Rick loses all patience.

"The mother of your children," Lori feigns innocence.

Her attempt to deny the truth infuriates Rick. He walks to the door and opens it.

"I'm sure you remember Michonne Barnes," Rick replies. "If you don't remember taking away any chance that I had to know my children, I only have more reason to avoid your psychopathic self." He continues to express his anger. "In that regard, you can keep the ring. You need to move out of my apartment. I will leave you a week before I call the cops and change the locks. Now, get out."


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks for the reviews**

**I don't own the walking dead**

**Please, review**

* * *

**Chapter IX**

* * *

_"I can't find him," Michonne panics, and she returns at the head of the web page for the fifth consecutive time in three minutes. _

_Sasha stands behind her like a divine figure watching over her mistakes. Michonne looks over her shoulder, and she feels helpless before the present predicament. _

_Weeks after the birth of her children, the hormones continue to rule unequivocally her mood. She feels anxious and burnt through the core of her soul. Something is amiss, and Michonne frightfully faces it. She has begun to unravel like threads of an old tapestry. _

_"Let me try," Sasha asks, and she waits for Michonne to free a spot for her. "You haven't slept in days, and you don't have the needed mental clarity to find a face among hundreds." She adds to comfort Michonne._

_Michonne hesitates and remains on the spot before the computer. Sasha is right that she lacks mind's clarity. __**They are going to kill me**_. _Michonne thinks filled with guilt. She has not had the smoothest transition in motherhood. So far, she has yet to find the joy of it. __**Grief and more grief. **__She thinks with bitterness. The cries of her children only serve to awaken her sadness. _

_For a second, there is silence. Michonne does not remember what quietness feels like. She is afraid to hear her voice. She does not want to disturb this moment of silence. Noises will only force her to continue to suffer in silence._

_**Don't let the cries begin. If they could sleep forever, I…**__ She immediately halts her thoughts._

_"You don't know what he looks like," Michonne argues. "Fuck, I'm not certain what he looks like too." She rubs her eyes, as she grows irritated. "I wasn't supposed to remember his face. It was sex...not a sin worth this mess." _

_Michonne cannot express all the anger, which she feels. Her hidden ire has irremediably stained the best pieces of her soul. Her silence serves as a torn blanket covering her ugly thoughts._

_**A fucking whore… Mike is right… The shit, he wrote in today's message...A fucking whore, I couldn't tell the father of those children apart in a sea of men**__. Michonne allows her thoughts to drift toward darker sides. _

_Michonne glances at her phone. Her stomach churns, and bile coats her tongue. She experiences a ravaging revulsion facing the little piece of technology. Mike has turned it into an object of percussion. She quietly waits for the next message filled with hatred._

_Through the days, she begins to justify the stream of insults, which Mike rains on her. Approximately a month has passed since the triplet birth, and each morning, Michonne receives vitriol as a greeting. She has thought of changing her number, and yet, Michonne never finds the strength to break the chain of abuse. _

_"Barnes," Sasha cocks an eyebrow, and she curiously looks at her distracted best friend. "You were obsessed with that man for at least two weeks. I know what the infamous Richard looks like." Sasha announces. "Shit, shit, shit...we forgot the bit where we couldn't find him after that night. I don't think your baby daddy is still working for this thing." She concludes. "But I know who might still be on this page." _

_Michonne does not bother with hope. She rests her head in her hands, and she feels extremely exhausted. Her headache refuses to fade. _

_"I…" Michonne feels numb. "Sasha," She quietly calls. "I don't think I can do this," She confesses. "Alone…" _

_Sasha stares at Michonne. For the last days, she has noticed the heaviness, which infiltrates her best friend's mood. She cannot tell what is amiss, but Sasha is certain something is wrong._

_"I'm here and so are your parents." Sasha gently reminds Michonne. "You're not alone."_

_Michonne shakes her head, and she knows that Sasha has not understood her confession. Having a crowd does not mean being in appropriate company. _

_"I don't want to do it," Michonne admits. "I've tried as hard as I could. I don't want to do it." She continues to speak, though her growing pain ties her vocal cords. "I don't know how to do this alone. They cry every time. It never stops. They know something is wrong with me. They know I don't want to do it." She rubs the exhaustion away from her reddened eyes. "They know they don't have a fucking father because I'm…" Michonne abruptly stops, and she is afraid to express a belief, which she borrows from her tormentor._

_"I can look for Shane," Sasha offers with hope. "He was still on the website when I last checked." _

_"He is not their father. They'll never have one," Michonne deadpans._

_"They have a father. We're going to find him through the man who started it all. Meanwhile, we will all try to learn how to deal with three babies." She smiles to encourage Michonne._

_Despite the warmth of Sasha's words, Michonne feels colder. The exhaustion threatens to swallow her each passing second. _

_"I need to fix this mess," Michonne says with a quiet determination. "I don't want…" she draws a deep breath. "I'm looking through adoption." She admits with shame. "It could be the best thing for Judith, RJ, and…" She hesitates on the third name. _

**He looks so much****like him. Looking at him is so odd. Then you remember his face...a liar and a whore has no business raising children. You don't like those children. **_Michonne feels numb. _

_"Carl," Sasha ends the sentence. "If it is because you want them to have a traditional family, give yourself a chance to find Richard before doing something drastic. He is out there, and we're finding him." She takes the computer from Michonne's hand. "I will look for Shane. Book a date and pray that he has answers about the guy who replaced him." She announces with optimism, which frightens Michonne._

_"You're not listening to me," Michonne quietly retorts. _

_"You're not sounding like yourself. Try it. We get Shane, and he will lead us to Richard. I know it." Sasha insists. _

_"Okay," She agrees with guilt influencing her decision._

**You should want to love them. You should love your children. I don't want those children. I never did. **_She thinks. Michonne struggles to form any positive thoughts since the triplet's birth. _

_Michonne has no will beyond a strong desire to forget the last nine months and her children. Michonne searches for a buoy in Rick. Until she reaches him, she will continue to drown. Michonne yearns for someone able to alleviate the hollow pain of parenthood. _

_"I can't find Shane," Sasha says with dread. _

_"I don't want to do it. I can't do it alone." Michonne repeats in an attempt to find comfort through her confession. _

_"I'm here. Your parents have been helping. You're not doing it alone." Sasha replies, and she reaches for her best friend._

_"They're not your children. They're Richard's one. Those children look like him." Michonne moves out Sasha's reach._

_"They are your children too." Sasha almost chokes on those words when she has to face a frightening reality. "You don't want them." _

_Michonne has a watery smile. Sasha notices that it is the first smile she sees on Michonne's face in months. Nine months slowly flash before Sasha's eyes. _**Happiness is what was missing**. _Sasha concludes. _

_"I would prefer if they could be with their father, but adoption is the best option," Michonne explains without saying much._

_"You didn't want to find him to…" Sasha stutters. "You want to give your children away to Richard." _

_"I think… I don't want them...I'm sorry." Michonne replies without expressing the profound mal, which gnaws her withering soul. _

_Michonne stands when she hears the tears permeating from the nursery, and it is a poor attempt to escape the oppression. She never goes near the babies. Sasha does most of the caring when her parents are absent. _

_"I'm here," Sasha announces and her words are for Carl, Judith, RJ, and Michonne. "I'm here."_

* * *

She has her back pressed against the wall. _So much for conversation and wine. _She thinks while he peels the dress from her skin. Sasha would focus on the strength prowess if she could think beyond Shane's searing kisses. His strong arms keep her from the floor. He sneaks his fingers between her back and the wall to unclasp her bra.

Shane slightly arches Sasha's back, and he presses his lips on her collarbone. His palm cups her breast, and Sasha moans. He runs his fingers along her arm, takes hold of her hand, and lifts it above her head.

Shane's mouth is everywhere, and Sasha feels breathless. Hands lifted above her head, she wants nothing but to touch him. She never offers control so easily, but Shane Walsh has his ways.

"You like this?" He sensually whispers in her ear, and he moves away from her neck to look in her eyes.

_Oh, he cares. _Sasha has to digest the surprise. She did not believe Shane to be a caring partner. _Cheeks clapped and nothing else_. Sasha expected sex with Shane Walsh to be good in an almost animalistic way. Now at the moment, she is not certain if she is ready.

Shane notices her hesitation, and he loosens his grip on her hands. With his arm firmly around her waist, he pulls Sasha away from the walls. She wraps her hand around his neck, and she presses her bare chest to his body. The fabric scratches her skin, and his scent is comforting.

_Oh, how lame! Now, you want to have romantic thoughts. Stop Sasha._ She attempts to lessen her excitement.

_What is going on now? _Sasha quietly panics while Shane expertly bends to pick her dress while she remains in his firm hold.

"What are you doing?" Sasha asks when he puts her on the floor, and he takes a step away from her.

Shane silently stretches the collar of her dress, and he passes it around her head. She looks at him expecting a clear answer. _He had better not pull the same crazy antics that his friend._ Sasha thinks with exasperation threatening to break through her previous glee.

"Lift your arms," Shane softly demands while he begins to push her dress down.

Sasha has yet to understand. One minute ago, she was naked and about to have sex, but now, she has her dress covering her assets.

"You forgot my G-string," Sasha says with discomfort. "If you are going to dress me up and leave, I will rather have back my expensive panty." She says attempting to cling on thinning dignity. "It is handmade by an old artisan who uses French lace made by small hands." Sasha retells the interesting story of her underwear to fill the embarrassing silence.

Shane cocks an eyebrow, and he picks the G-string, which he discarded a few minutes ago. He looks at Sasha, and a cocky smile stretches his lips. He shoves the lace undergarments in his pocket.

"Keeping it as a recompense for good behaviour," Shane announces, and he takes Sasha's hand. "Do you know how much strength it takes to stop when we both want to fuck?" He asks. "The collector value of your panty only adds to my desire." He finds the humour to tease her.

_What the hell?_ Sasha takes a minute trying to clear the meaning of his statement.

"If we both want to fuck, we should fuck," Sasha states the obvious. "My underwear is a decent payment."

Shane chuckles and looks at Sasha with amusement. He drags her to the bed, and he pushes her to the mattress. Again, he observes her reaction when he climbs over her. He parts Sasha's legs to lie between, and it is almost imperceptible. Sasha tenses long enough for Shane to notice a conflict.

"You want it, but you don't want it...want it," Shane wisely points out with the most confusing sentence Sasha ever heard.

Shane moves to the side, and she regrets his weight pressing her to the mattress.

Sasha rolls her eyes. _Does he know I was ready to pay to fuck him? _She thinks with frustration.

"I want to have sex with you," Sasha stubbornly argues. "I want it...want it." She repeats in language, which he appears to be fluent.

However, Sasha leaves the bed. She drags a cupboard open, and she grabs new underwear. _If the cheeks are not being clapped, let wrap it. _

"I know," Shane confidently replies, "I want it too, but you don't want this first date to end in a fuck. I can respect that." He clarifies the meaning of her hesitation. "I'm respecting that." Shane insists.

"Oh," Sasha sighs, "I…" she returns to the bed, and she lies on her back. "Let's say that you did a good job on that date." She admits how Shane has left her wanting more with him.

_He is a sweetheart..._She thinks with growing amusement.

"I know," He laughs, "conversation and wine," he comments on her blatant excuses to extend the date. "Get the wine. We will stick to the conversation." Shane announces.

_Welp...you got yourself into this._ Sasha drags herself under her blanket.

"Wine is not an option. I don't have any bottle home after the other night with Michonne. Conversation, on the other hand, I have nothing else to offer now. You don't want to fuck." Sasha jokes.

"I'm not spasming every time you touch me." Shane points out. "You don't want anything casual, and I think we can start the conversation there." He follows Sasha's example, and he sinks under her blanket.

"Are you sure?" Sasha holds on her suspicions. "You don't prefer to bust a nut and move onto the next willing body." Sasha graciously offers an exit door.

_She thinks I'm a hoe. Grimes and his antics._ Shane quietly laments.

"You're the one who is going to have to be sure. Tonight, I'm certain. If it stops, I will let you know." Shane replies.

"I'm going to agree to go on a second date," Sasha announces.

"Aren't you lucky I have a month without night shifts?" Shane smirks.

"How did you pull that," Sasha asks to continue the conversation.

"Won a bet thanks to Rick's libido and his infatuation to your best friend," Shane explains. "Now, come here." He rolls on his side to face Sasha, "I will get you off." He deadpans.

"I thought no sex tonight," Sasha argues, but she moves until she is in Shane's arms.

"You think I was a pricey gigolo with limited resources," he says while he grabs her thigh and throws it over him. "Don't question how I do it, enjoy the climax." Shane clarifies.

…

…

...

_Fuck it, fuck it, _Sasha internally laments when the first note resonates in the room. She almost wants to ignore the call, but she does not have such liberty.

"I guess we have found a way to spice the night," Shane announces as he passes the phone to Sasha.

He kisses her collarbone while she remains perched on him. He takes a hold of her waist, and his fingers draw an odd to the beauty of her curve.

Sasha sighs with disappointment. She recognises Michonne's distinctive ringtone.

"I don't think it is an option now," Sasha laments as she answers the call. "Is everything okay with the children?" She knowingly asks due to the time of the call.

For a few minutes, Sasha quietly listens to Michonne. Shane attempts to hear some glimpses of the conversation. From Sasha's expression, Shane establishes that the situation is dire.

"Barnes, take a deep breath." She demands when Michonne greets her with tears. "Michonne, what is wrong with RJ." Sasha attempts to gain clarity. "Stop crying, Mimi. I will be right there. Give me the time to put something on because well I'm butt-naked. I don't have to come, but I don't want you to be alone. I'm coming," She insists to calm Michonne. "You need everyone, and I will be with you faster than you think." She states with unwavering determination.

"Well," He asks when she moves away to dress up.

"RJ…" Sasha searches for the appropriate words, "I couldn't hear it well, but something about not waking up. I don't know."

Shane rises from the bed, and he looks for his phone. He intends to call Rick to do what Michonne should have done.

"She called him," Sasha knowingly states. "Michonne called Rick. She is waiting for him to reach the hospital."

Shane's phone displays missed calls from Rick. He unlocks his phone, and Rick has sent a message.

_Fuck…_ Shane's concern grows to consuming anguish.

"I will drive," Shane announces. "I don't think you can see through a curtain of tears." He cups Sasha's face and wipes her tears.

"Life is fucked up," Sasha laments. "RJ is…" She feels breathless.

* * *

Rick frantically runs through corridors. In his tizzy, he has lost the ability to orient himself. Rick has worked seven years in this hospital, and he no longer knows where the departments are.

His heart races to catch up with his anxiety. The morgue's door stands tall and frightening. His legs suddenly come to a halt. Frightened and desperate, his body fails to carry his brain command.

Rick feels numb, and his stomach churns out of fear. His vision is blurred. He inhales to fill his lungs while they combust. He rises to his height and works the courage to approach the right room.

Michonne stands at the corridor's end. She appears frail and wrecked into dust. What was worth his anger? Rick has lost all his ill feelings. He regains some steam, and he sprints to Michonne.

"I'm here," Rick breathes the words between heavy pants. "RJ?" The name comes harshly chopped by his anguish.

Eyes red and filled with tears, Michonne silently stares at Rick. What was worth her anger? She hurts too much to remember a minor inconvenience. Her trembling hands reach for him. Her fingers twist and slip around the fabric of his shirt. In a fractured breath, Michonne launches herself in Rick's arms.

Her attempts to speak melt into hollow sobs. His warmth does not suffice to comfort her. Rick holds Michonne with similar panic.

"RJ," He is uncertain, "I'm here." He offers what little comfort he manages to create with words easily believed.

"He wasn't waking up," Michonne whispers, and it loudly echoes in Rick's ears. "He wasn't waking up." She repeats frightened by the meaning of what she announces. "He didn't wake up. They tried...RJ is," Her voice dies between sobs and quiet hysteria.

…

…

...

Rick drags Michonne in his arms. He does not think she will be able to stand any longer. She welcomes his hug, and she has used his shoulder to cry for the last twenty minutes. Since he steps in the hospital corridor, she has drifted toward him.

Rick is glad Michonne is next to him. He does not know how else, he will be able to endure such a hardship. He hugs her tighter, and he will crush her if he allows himself to hold as tightly as he wants.

"We can do this," Rick whispers in Michonne's ear.

Michonne looks at Rick, and she doubts his words. The hospital corridor is cold and empty. The nurses have taken RJ in a new ward, and Michonne cannot tell if her son will come out of it. She struggles to breathe, and despite her best effort, she fails to hold her tears.

"He wasn't waking up," Michonne's voice breaks. "He was good and playing." She attempts to find a meaning to the catastrophe. "He wasn't waking up." She struggles again to breathe. "He hasn't woken up, Rick." She repeats what she told Rick when he walked in the emergency room where RJ received his first care.

Rick draws a deep breath. Given the opportunity, Michonne might melt in a puddle of tears, and Rick attempts to keep her sane.

"He is safe," Rick softly says. "He is safe," He repeats for both their peace of mind. "Give me a second, and I will go check on him." He offers.

Michonne looks at Rick. She hesitates because she refuses to lose his warmth. Despite her desire to cling to him, Michonne takes a step back.

"I will be back soon, and here, take it." Rick drags the key out of his pocket, "My on-call room will be more comfortable for the children. You can rest a bit too." He offers after looking at Judith and Carl who are forming the oddest ball.

"I'm going to put them in the on-call room, and I will be back here," Michonne announces.

Rick nods, and he picks Judith while Michonne takes Carl. She quietly follows Rick, which leads her to his office. He drags open the door attached to his office, and he allows Michonne inside the room.

Rick and Michonne carefully lay their children on the bed. He walks to the cupboard and pulls out a blanket. He covers Carl and Judith.

"They should be okay now," Rick says, and he crouches to be at eye-level with the children.

"I hope," Michonne quietly replies. "I think I have to tell them now what is going on with RJ." She moves the hair away from her face. "They saw him and I…" she sits in the corner of the bed. "I don't know how to do this." She confesses with gloom. "I don't know how to be a perfect mother. Look at me doing it all wrong." She inhales.

Rick reaches for Michonne's hand. His big palm swallows her small fingers, and he squeezes her hand. Michonne sighs and wipes a new wave of tears.

"I don't know what to do," Michonne admits. "I don't want to do it." She confesses. "They are five. RJ is five. His brother and sister shouldn't have to understand death through him." She stares at the fragile frame of her children. "He was born the smallest. They all had big heads, but with RJ, I didn't suffer much. He was small. He was so precious. My precious baby was a miracle. Too small to survive, and I was told he didn't get to grow because Judith and Carl were taking all the resources. It happens often with multiple children pregnancy. He survived it all. He is five. You miss their birthday. You missed his life. You missed the birth." Michonne continues to stare at her children. "I have albums full of pictures of that wrinkled small miracle. I made each of them for you. Keeping the spot warm so you could fit in that perfect family they deserved. He is five. Our baby is five. He is dying." Michonne wipes her tears.

Rick attempts to reach for her, but he has lost her to bittersweet memories.

"How do I tell Carl that his little brother is dying? That is his best friend. He has never spent a day without him. I don't know how to tell him. He is five. He only has begun to learn how to count. You missed their first school day. He has a girlfriend. We got new colour pencils to impress her. RJ lost most of them, and Carl took the fall. This time, he cannot protect his brother. Our babies are five. Where did I go wrong? I tried to fix it all. I kept that small spot. That invisible space where you could fit. I don't know…" Michonne has her heart cracking before the cruelty of life.

"Judith," Michonne no longer has tears, and she looks over her shoulder to face Rick. "She will understand everything. She is so smart. She is going to ask why RJ didn't come to play when she shook him. He always plays with her. She tells him all her gossip. He attends all her tea parties. You missed them all so far. How do I answer her question?"

Rick moves away from the children, and he comes to stand before Michonne. He puts his hand on her shoulders.

"You don't have to do any of it," Rick assures Michonne. "You can be next to them while I tell them that RJ is going to be sick for a while." He crouches and cups Michonne's face. "He is only going to be sick. It is going to be rough on RJ, you and I. It is a good thing we have them." He wipes Michonne's tears. "I'm sure Carl and Judith will put millions of smiles to RJ's lips. I'm going to do the same. You don't have to do anything but weather the storm. RJ is going to be fine." He finishes with confidence. "I'm going to check on RJ. I need you to rest as well. When he needs you, you will be able to intervene." He adds to soothe her ache. "I need you to rest, Michonne."

Michonne nods and she reluctantly lies on the bed. Rick smiles at Michonne.

"I will be back," Rick says as he grabs his white coat. "With some good news."

* * *

Rick carefully approaches RJ's bedside. He does not want to disturb the team working on him, but Rick has little choice. RJ has woken up thirty minutes ago, and the little boy has decided to throw a tantrum. He does not see a familiar visage, and he rightfully panics.

RJ pulls on his catheter while he twists and turns trying to avoid the helping hands of the nurses. He empties his lungs screaming and crying. Desperation and fright saturate those raw cries.

"Mama," RJ yells, and he is rightfully terrified after waking up to a medical room. "Doctor Richard." He crawls away from the lady clad in a sterile suit. "Mama"

"It's okay," The nurse tries to calm RJ. "It's okay." She tries to reach for RJ who slaps her hand away. "You don't have to worry."

RJ mistrusts the honeyed tone of the woman. He crawls at the corner of the bed. He continues to pull on his catheter. The tears become louder when he pulls too hard on his arm.

"Mama…" RJ sobs and he crawls away from Tara. "Doctor Richard." He looks around him expecting to see his parents materialize before him. "I want my mommy." He bellows. "Doctor Richard, save me," he yells while associating the hospital with Rick. "Mama." He cries harder.

Rick moves closer to the clear box to answer his son's call. He attempts to approach RJ's emergency doctor without creating more chaos. He barely closes his sterile suit.

"Denise," Rick quietly calls, "I will take over for a bit," he demands more than he suggests.

Denise looks at Rick who is her department chief, and she does as he commands. She steps away from the frightened child, and she comes out of the room.

"He is suffering a white coat psychosis," Denise announces. "He doesn't want to let us do anything. I have no vitals so far." She laments. "Tara is trying to calm him, but I think we could get one of his parents to calm him." She adds with a concerned look at RJ.

Rick closes his coat, and he slides in the sterile kit. He covers his shoes, and he pulls his hair into the surgical bonnet.

"That is why I'm here," Rick replies and he cleans his hands. "Michonne is a bit too anxious now." He adds. "She will add to his agitation."

Denise is quiet for a second as she attempts to grasp detail, which she overlooked. Now, her mind fit the piece in the puzzle. Rick's clarification jolts her memory.

"Oh, you're the Rick Grimes, who the mother listed. As in the emergency report Richard Grimes… oh," Denise stutters for a few seconds. "Chief?" She curiously looks at Rick.

Rick cocks an eyebrow trying to understand his colleague's reaction. RJ's cries distract him, and looking at his son crying through the transparent curtain breaks Rick's heart.

"Can I have the ER report?" Rick extends his hand to receive the report. "Do you know what caused the loss of consciousness?" He raises his head to face Denise who has yet to bring RJ's file. "Did you run a CT?" He continues to list more test, which might help confirm a diagnostic

"Chief," Denise quietly says, "You can't have access to the report." She says as if he should be aware. "Ethically, I can't let you read it."

Rick blinks, and he wonders why Denise will say those words. He reads all the reports of his subordinates. If there is a need for adjustment, Rick brings the correction. Now more than ever, he needs to see what caused the loss of consciousness.

"He is my patient," Rick announces. "I have to update his file."

Denise has a moment of confusion, and she wonders if she misunderstood the situation for a second time. She walks to the trolley, and she pulls RJ's medical report.

"I'm sorry, but I got something mixed up," Denise says, and she passes the record to Rick. "When I took history, the mother gave me your name as the father. I guess she must have been stressed, or it's another Rick Grimes."

Rick stares at his name next to the word father. He draws a deep breath, and warmth spreads through him. Michonne mentioned him as RJ's father. She kept his spot warm until he could fit in the picture. What was worth his anger?

"No, I'm his father." Rick replies, "I'm RJ's father. Get me Siddiq. He agreed to take over the case for me. I will be inside with my son. He needs me." He steps in the ICU.

….

….

….

"That's fine, RJ." Rick holds the toddler in his arms, "It's not going to hurt." He softly says while he repeatedly kisses his son's forehead. "Just one more for me." He adds while Tara brings the oximeter.

RJ cowers in Rick's arm, and he carefully hides in his father's chest. Seeing Rick has considerably reduced his anxiety. He has stopped screaming, and he has settled for crying in Rick's chest.

"Sweetheart, it doesn't hurt," Rick states. "I'm going to show you, and then you can try like a big boy." He offers his finger to Tara who places the machine to check Rick's oxygen level. "See," he shows RJ. "Daddy is fine," the word slips off his mind.

Trusting Rick, RJ hesitantly offers his hand to Tara. She places the second oximeter on RJ's forefinger. RJ hesitantly grabs the small apparel, and he curiously inspects his finger.

"How much?" Rick anxiously asks.

"Getting better than at his arrival. He is at 86% saturation." Tara announces.

"The fever is still there." Rick sighs, and he wouldn't overthink the detail if the patient wasn't RJ. "Tara, tell Siddiq to have a plan for me." He orders. "I want diagnostic and prognostic remade.

"Doctor Siddiq already asked that we placed him in the sterile room," Tara explains to Rick. "When the sedative and analgesic take effect, we will transfer him after the artificial coma takes. He also wanted to talk to you." She adds. "He said he will wait for you."

Rick takes in the information. He cannot help but to overanalyze Siddiq's decision and protocol. He reminds himself that he is the father. RJ is certainly helping to keep Rick focused on his most important role.

RJ tightly hugs his father, and he hides from everyone else in the room.

"I want mama, Doctor Richard." RJ quietly asks.

Rick kisses the crown of RJ's head, and he attempts to keep his son distracted while Tara pushes the sedative in his perfusion.

"I will go get your mother," Rick announces with a smile.

RJ grabs Rick's shirt, and he clings to his father. New tears begin to fill those eyes, which are carbon copies of his own. RJ hugs Rick, and he does not seem ready to free his father.

"Don't go," RJ pleads. "Please…" He manages to be polite between warm new waves of tears.

"I'm never going to leave you." Rick finds the need to take that promise. "I'm not leaving." He assures his son.

Rick holds RJ until the sedative begins to act. RJ is becoming drowsy. He speaks of everything and nothing. His little fists firmly hold Rick's sterile suit. He forms a small ball trying to fit completely in Rick's arm.

"You need a horse, Doctor Richard," RJ says unexpectedly. "Your car is not fast." He sighs. "Mommy says my daddy will have a horse." He looks at Rick with a smile calling for conspiracy. "You need a horse, or you can't be my daddy," He announces before drifting to sleep.

Rick smiles, and he carefully places RJ's on the bed. He drags the blanket over the frail body.

"A horse," He chuckles. "I guess your grandfather will let me borrow one of his." Rick kisses RJ's forehead. "I will do everything to be your daddy. I can't miss more things, my little miracle."

* * *

Rick finds Michonne pacing back and forth in his office. She has left the on-call room. When she lies eyes on him, her face twists in a concerned expression. Rick quietly closes the door.

"I didn't want to wake Judith and Carl with my pacing and fidgeting," Michonne attempts to explain her presence in his office. "I rested a bit," She adds to prevent further questioning.

Rick nods, and he offers the cup of coffee that he bought for her in the case where she will be awake. Michonne takes the cup, and she feels grateful for the warm comfort.

"RJ woke up, but they put him in an artificial coma to help with the recovery," He announces before Michonne asks. "When they get him in the sterile room, you can go see him." He adds to quiet Michonne's anxiety.

"Okay," Michonne draws a deep breath, "Thank you," She stands before Rick and hugs him. "Thank you," she repeats with sincerity.

Rick does not know how to react. Her gratitude prompts a certain discomfort. He has a reminder that they have that complicated dynamic. Rick wants to speak, and he does not dare to threaten the fragile balance of tonight.

Michonne tightens her hold around Rick, and her arms around him become a cage holding his doubts at bay. She nuzzles him. She draws her strength from his steady heartbeat.

Michonne finds it natural to borrow from Rick's strength. Upon finding her son on the floor, Michonne saw fit to call Rick. Despite their unresolved conflict, she wanted him to be with their son. When Denise asked for the father's detail, Michonne found herself speaking of Rick Grimes.

"You have to come with me," Michonne replies. "I'm going to scare him with my tears, and I need you there to make him feel safe." She admits. "You have to come with me." She insists.

Rick kisses the crown of Michonne's head, and he slowly breaks the embrace to face her. He looks in Michonne's eyes, and he notices the sincerity in her reddened eyes. However, he hardly knows where to stand now. He possibly misinterprets her plea.

"I can…" Rick searches for words. "I can't work with him." He reiterates what he told her the previous night. "My team is competent. I can't…" He draws a deep breath. "Siddiq is experienced and second only to me. I'm asking for a consultant. I want to care for him. I have missed some birthday, but now, he needs his dad. You need his dad. I'm his father. If you asked, I might comply, but let me fill that spot you kept for so long."

Michonne takes a step back, and she looks at Rick with an expression, which he fails to translate. _I fuck this up._ Michonne thinks with growing embarrassment.

"I didn't call you because you're RJ's doctor." Michonne reveals. "I thought our son was dead. He might have died. I wanted him to be with his father. You were the first number I had to call. I need you to come with me because I'm a mess right now. Children notice those things. You're in a better state." She clarifies her demands. "You're going to put a smile on his lips. You will do whatever you do that has them drunk on happiness when they see you. You're going to be their daddy." Michonne softly smiles.

Rick finds her happiness beautiful. He scratches his head and attempts to focus on the situation ahead.

_Apologize to the man_… Michonne braces herself for a necessary conversation.

"Okay," Rick replies. "So you know, I'm a mess right now too. I think we get a coffee and attempt to bring fake smiles on both our lips before we step in that room." He admits.

Michonne looks at Rick. He looks as if he needs sleep and a hug. She comes to stand before him, and she cups his face.

"I'm here if you need a hug and a shoulder." Michonne offers her support to Rick.

_Apologize to the woman. _Rick feels his guilt arise. He rests his head against her forehead. His nose brushes hers. Rick is close enough to seek his peace on her lips. What could comfort him better than her sweet taste? Each breath is a caress, which may inadvertently become a kiss.

"I'm going to check on our children," Michonne attempts to escape the tension, and she breaks out of his embrace

...

…

…

When Rick joins Michonne in the on-call room, she is attempting to calm Carl. He comes to stand behind her, and he extends his hand to help console his son.

"A nightmare," Michonne replies before Rick decides to inquire about his son's turmoil. "Spiders," she mouths not to frighten Carl.

Rick bends, and he hovers above Michonne. She hardly concerns herself with his almost oppressing presence. He loves to watch her when she is unguarded. Rick has noticed that Michonne is always ready to flee or fight. However, around the children, she is unguarded. She smiles and lives deserved happiness.

_If she could be this way around me, I wouldn't have to fight her at every cor_ner. Rick feels some regrets. The free-spirited Michonne is gorgeous. He drinks the sight of her. Locks loosely tied, she is the picture of sobriety and charm. Carl in her arms, Michonne wears motherhood with elegance.

"We can chase the spiders," Michonne says with tenderness, "You lay down, and close your eyes." She helps Carl return to the bed. "Hold my hand," she offers her hand to Carl. "I will go with you in your dream, and I will fight the spider." She says with utter seriousness. "Look, doctor Richard will come too." She looks over her shoulder, and she addresses her brightest smile to Rick.

Rick senses an ounce of mischief. Carl's big eyes are on him. The blue, which still glistens from tears, prompts Rick to action.

"Doctor Richard," Carl says with glee, "You're going to fight the spiders."

Rick's eyebrows fly to his hairline. Michonne moves to the side, and she calls for Rick with her hand. Rick kneels next to Michonne, and he takes the hand, which Carl extends.

"When can we have our hands back?" Rick whispers in Michonne's ear.

Carl's eyes are on the pair, and he tightly holds his parents' hands. He begins to close his eyes, but they immediately open to looking if Rick and Michonne continue to hold his hands.

"When we have fought all the spiders, he will fall deeply asleep and let our hands go." She announces with amusement.

…

…

…

Carl continues to hold his parents' hand for half an hour. Rick and Michonne forcefully remain in the same close spot. The silence is heavy with the desire to converse. Their eyes can only carry angst and longing for so long.

_Apologize to the woman. _Rick cannot escape the insistent thought. He does not know where to begin. _Everywhere_. His mind supplies the reply.

"I'm sorry," Rick quietly offers his apology.

Michonne blinks and she searches for words to express her sentiment of contrition.

"For?" Michonne asks trying to buy the time to work on the sincerity of her apology.

"Lori and what she told you four years ago," Rick replies. "I'm sorry her lies have caused an impossible misunderstanding." He doubles down with words chosen with a cooler mind. "I didn't make it a secret how little I wanted to be a father. The entire fatherhood felt like a forbidden concept if it wasn't with a woman that would…" Rick pauses. "Lori didn't feel right. I didn't want to add children in the mess. I want our children. I embrace this fatherhood. You certainly drive me insane, I'm afraid to be a bad father, but you feel right as a partner… I mean as my teammate. You're an amazing mother, and I want to be an amazing dad watching you. I care for Judith, Carl, and RJ. Allow me to show you I want this." Rick looks at their hands, which Carl holds to his chest. "I'm no longer missing shit."

Michonne draws a breath, and she twists to face Rick. She has to calm the gallop of her heart, and she has to reign over her passion. He looks at her in a way that feeds her delusions. _What if_… she cannot help the giddiness. Her heart adores palpitating for Rick Grimes.

"You shouldn't have to prove your ability to be an amazing father to me," Michonne points out. "I get it now that you shouldn't fit a box, which I created to keep me from old mistakes. The first year, I became depressed. I could find it in me to be a mother. I thought if I could find you, they would have a parent able to love them. I didn't know you beyond that night, but I was certain you would be an amazing father. You were the man who treated me better than any men I knew at the time did. You were kind, gentle, and patient. You respected me, and it felt as if I was loved unconditionally. You cared for me, and it was a taste of happiness, which I fed off for years. I feasted on crumbs, and I might have been greedy. I knew you would be an excellent father. I turned this thing in something to fix my sin. I was and am still jealous." Michonne refrains from vocalizing that she is jealous of her children for having his love, and she is jealous of him for being able to enjoy parenthood without baggage. "You should prove yourself to our children. I can't fall into the same flawed logic." Michonne admits with embarrassment.

"We can't," Rick corrects Michonne. "I don't want to lose our baby over petty egos."

"Something legal should prevent this from happening. I will have something drawn for now. You were right, and we need lawyers. We can work on custody and visitation. So I don't feel like I can punish you through the children." Michonne explains. "I'm sorry."

* * *

Sasha and Shane find Rick and Michonne in Rick's office. The pair of parents quietly share space and coffee. Sasha rushes to hug Michonne who has finally stopped crying.

Shane slides a sandwich to Rick, and he carefully puts one before Michonne. Rick gratefully takes the food. He has never felt more exhausted.

"Thanks," Rick opens the wrapper, and he chews on the fresh sandwich.

"Where is RJ?" Sasha sits by Michonne. "Is he okay?" She asks with growing panic.

"ICU," Shane and Rick simultaneously reply. "They will move him in the sterile room," Rick adds.

Shane throws a concerned look to Rick who pretends he hasn't seen it. He does not want to add more on Michonne's plate. He has a few suspicions, which he needs Siddiq to confirm. There is no need to increase panic on a prognostic.

"I can see him once they move him to the sterile room," Michonne says with hope.

Michonne sighs and she feels exhausted. She never expected her night to take this horrible turn. She does not know why Mondays in her life have to be days where life decides to be complicated.

"He is okay?" Michonne attempts to reply and gain confirmation from Rick.

He reaches for her hands, and she intertwines their fingers. Michonne finds soothing warmth next to Rick. She has spent the last two hours digging her strength in the depth of his quiet support.

"Resting and recovering thanks to the artificial coma," Rick reiterates what he previously told an anxious Michonne. "He is going to be fine." He adds to encourage Michonne.

"I called your parents," Sasha tells Michonne. "And they should be here soon enough," She states right when Michonne's phone rings.

"They are here," Michonne announces, "We have to join them at the cafeteria." She continues when she reads Evelyn's message.

Michonne stands to leave, and she expects Sasha to follow her. Sasha does not move, and she looks at Rick.

"Sasha?" Michonne asks with confusion.

"Go ahead," Sasha announces, "I want to talk to Richard from a medical professional to another." She continues.

Michonne frowns and she looks at Rick. He has a blank expression. Michonne sighs and she does not want to regress with Rick.

"You're a sex therapist, Williams," Michonne argues. "What conversation from a medical professional to a medical professional." She knowingly inquires.

Sasha cocks an eyebrow. She does not move from her seat. Michonne sighs and she looks at Rick. He smiles at Michonne. She does not like the flutters of her heart over that confident smile. The cloudiness around her mind already caused enough problems.

"I will join you to the cafeteria," Shane says, and he begins to head out. "Let's go, Michonne. Tonight, Sasha has a growing interest in the conversation."

* * *

Michonne reluctantly leaves the room. Shane is two steps behind her. She feels his eyes digging holes in her back.

"I apologized," Michonne seeks peace.

Shane comes to stand near Michonne, and he does not display any emotion behind mild interest.

"I will save my best friend's talk for a day when you can put up with fuckery and meddling in your private life. I have better timing than Sasha." Shane says as he walks away from her. "I only hope you meant that apology because whatever Rick said in response is sincere."

Michonne feels grateful that she does not have to revisit her embarrassing actions. Rick might have decided to brush their last argument, but it weighs on Michonne.

_Put your big girl pants and admit the truth. _Michonne thinks with growing shame. Tonight has proven how her accusations were only expressions of a bitter venom. Rick Grimes cares for his children. She should have never slept with him.

"Baby," Evelyn interrupts Michonne's lamentation. "How is he?" She asks as she squashes her daughter in a strong hug.

Michonne welcomes the crushing hug, and she draws a deep breath saturated with the comforting perfume of her mother.

"They put him in an artificial coma to help with recovery. It's going to last a day or two." She repeats to the best of her ability what Rick tried to convey.

Evelyn leads Michonne to the table where they sit, and she drags a seat for her daughter.

"We can help with Carl and Judith," Evelyn offers. "They can stay at home with your father and me." She adds and takes Michonne's hand. "Anything to help."

Michonne squeezes her mother's hand, and she rests her head on her shoulder. She suddenly feels more strength. Her father places a cup of coffee before Michonne, and she gladly takes a sip.

"They are sleeping in their father's office." Michonne says, "I will get them as soon as Sasha ceases to grill Rick."

"Why is Sasha grilling your baby daddy?" Michonne's father inquires.

Michonne is not prepared to answer that question. Her demeanour does not hold similar secrecy. Timidity pours out of her pore.

"Because that is what Sasha does when Michonne loves a man." Evelyn knowingly says. "It's evident. She is in love with the man."

"You're in love with your baby daddy." Michonne's father repeats out of shock.

* * *

Rick watches Sasha with curiosity, and he is too exhausted to care for the woman's scrutiny. _Let's pay for being an emotional mess_. Rick thinks with reluctance. Sasha has every reason to chew and spit him out.

"Shoot," Rick reluctantly breaks the silence.

Sasha's expression is softer than what Rick will expect of a lecturing authority. He waits for Sasha to stab him with words. He has not been brilliant with his approach to the rising conflict.

"She called you first," Sasha begins with seriousness. "She always calls me first when it comes to the triplet," she adds with a small smile. "When her water broke, she called me first. When they said their first words, she called me first."

Rick does not know how to feel about the information. Sasha watches him with an unreadable expression. He feels small before the solemnity, which Sasha decides to show.

"I guess it's time for me to step down. She finally found you." Sasha sighs, "And it took five years. If she makes you go through a roller coaster, cut her some slack. She waited for you way too long." She chuckles. "So you know, Michonne gets anxious about the smallest thing. If she calls you over a moving tooth, it's normal. You're the triplet's father."

Rick chuckles because Michonne did call him over a moving tooth.

"I expected something more frightening," Rick confesses. "I can deal with night calls about moving teeth. I want to deal with those calls." He admits.

Sasha laughs, and she will save the threats for quieter days. However, she spent five years being Rick's fill in, and she is happy to be only aunty Sasha from now.

"For the threats, I will save them from the day you leave the dog house." Sasha teases, "I have never seen a man ruin his chance as fast as you do." She adds with cruel sincerity.

"Well…" Rick stutters.

Sasha analyses Rick's reaction to her words. She has never seen happiness crumble before facing Rick Grimes having the epiphany that he might have ruined every chance to have the woman he loves..._fuck, fuck, _fuck. Rick's mind races.

"Oh," Sasha pauses to confirm what his expression allows to transpire. "You're in love with Michonne."


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you for the reviews.  
**

**I don't own the walking dead**

* * *

**Chapter X**

* * *

Rick experiences a bittersweet sentiment. He hardly stomachs the wave of feelings that invades hi, and yet he wants more of the delightful joy, which he can steal from watching Michonne being a mother.

Michonne allows him a glimpse in her family's intimacy, and Rick feels greedy. He wants to ask her to scoot to the side and let him join. Perhaps, Michonne has heard his thoughts. She looks over her shoulders, and she first panics when he is not behind the glass.

Michonne breathes a sigh of relief when Rick leaves Denise's side to come to stand by the glass walls. She smiles softly, and Rick does not know what to make of himself. He returns her smile despite his internal conflicts and feeling of needing more than a reassuring smile.

"RJ is being stubborn," Michonne says with a tone of conspiracy. "I think you should talk to him," She glances at her son to confirm that he wants Rick to join them.

"But I'm not sleepy," RJ laments. "Tell mama, I'm not sleepy, Doctor Richard."

Mother and son look at Rick with expectations. Rick scratches his head. He wants to cackle because the pair appears to be serious, and his words will seal one party's victory. He stands in the middle questioning whom not to offend.

"Come inside here and tell RJ why he has to sleep, Rick." Michonne orders more than she suggests.

Rick does not believe he has any choice. He begins to replace his contaminated gown with a sterile one.

"Who is Rick?" RJ asks while being utterly confused that a human being called Rick exists.

_Your dad who needs to cooperate and tell you to sleep. _Michonne thinks with amusement. She looks at Rick who again goes to the process of sterilization. She remembers that RJ has to remain in the cleanroom for a few more days.

_"_Rick is Doctor Richard," Michonne replies.

RJ's eyes grow as big as a saucer. He frowns while trying to understand his mother's statement.

"Doctor Richard is not Rick. He is Doctor Richard." RJ replies while questioning his mother sanity.

"That is how I call him," Michonne attempts to clarify.

"Why?" RJ cannot believe his mother will do such a thing. "His name is Doctor Richard." He vehemently claims. "He is Doctor Richard, mama. Not Rick."

_Is it crack?_ Michonne cannot help but wonder. How can it be an argument about how she decides to call her baby daddy.

"Oh my God," Michonne chuckles. "He is not my Doctor, RJ," she points out.

"But he is not a Rick." RJ retorts with great confusion.

Rick finds mother and son arguing about how to call him. He smiles and comes to stand near Michonne.

"I'm her Rick," he plainly states.

Michonne's mouth falls open for a few seconds. RJ looks between both adults. How can Doctor Richard be his mother's Rick?

The toddler's brain is struggling with connections. How can Doctor Richard belong to his mother? His intelligent brain goes to feasible scenarios. Rick is too old to be Michonne's child and too young to be her father. The conclusion comes like a late-night epiphany.

"Oh!" RJ yells like eureka. "You're mama's boyfriend, Doctor Richard." He says matter of factly and shocked by his discovery, RJ's mouth falls open.

He looks at both adults with squinty eyes.

"No, he isn't my boyfriend." Michonne rushes to kill the burgeoning ideas flourishing in her son's mind.

"I'm her Rick…" He helplessly adds because RJ's conclusion has left him speechless.

"But you're Doctor Richard." RJ says in dismay that Doctor Richard could be another being.

"He can be both," Michonne attempts to clear the confusion. "I'm mama to you but Michonne too." She explains the best she can.

However, Michonne's words are oil poured on the fire. The existence of Michonne further confused RJ. He wonders what Michonne is.

"Mama is your Michonne," RJ asks while becoming greatly appalled. "Eww, she is not mama." He whines, and looks of betrayal follow his parents. "Mama should be Doctor Richard's mama."

"Help," Michonne laments and looks at Rick who stands by her left. "Do something, Rick."

"You should have agreed with the boyfriend thing," Rick plainly states. "That was way simple to explain. How do I explain names and titles to a five-years-old? Your boyfriend is." Michonne pinches Rick to interrupt his tirade.

"And rookie mistake," Michonne sighs.

"You're mama's boyfriend." RJ asks once again in shock, "Eww," he whines and covers his eyes, "Eww," he yelps. "You kiss mama." He accusingly looks at his father.

_When he finds out that I did more than kissing, I won't hear the end of it._ Rick thinks with amusement.

"RJ, Doctor Richard is not my boyfriend," Michonne repeats to stop RJ's existential crisis before the discovery that his mother and Doctor Richard kiss.

"But he is your Rick," RJ repeats as if offended by the audacity of his mother to deny her relationship with a man standing next to her.

"That is his name," Michonne softly says.

"His name is Doctor Richard." RJ, prideful, argues with his life on the line.

"Rick is my short name. Like RJ is yours." Rick makes a second attempt at clarifying the situation. "Your name is Richard too, but everyone calls you RJ."

"Everyone calls you Rick," RJ emphasizes the last word, and his mind might explode in the process of understanding. "But you're Doctor Richard."

"Yes, I'm." Rick agrees, and Michonne massages out a headache. "Only you and special people can call me Doctor Richard," He adds for good measure.

"You're making it worse," Michonne laments. "You opened the way to a new set of questions and complaints."

RJ immediately proves his mother's point as he continues to yap.

"Mama is special," RJ says with a scolding tone.

Rick draws a deep breath. He looks at Michonne while silently begging for help. With her moving hand, Michonne encourages Rick to proceed. He crouches to be at eye level with his son.

"Absolutely," Rick agreed wholeheartedly with RJ. "She is very special to me."

"She calls you Rick," RJ retorts with a full display of scepticism.

Rick ruffles RJ's hair. _This boy will have me saying the right things at the absolute worst time. I got co-parentzoned two days ago, but he wants me to recite an odd to Michonne. _Rick silently laments.

"She says it differently," Rick noiselessly declares. He futilely attempts to make the conversation a secret between his son and himself. "She makes it special because she holds a particular place in my esteem. I respect her. I think she is brilliant. I found her beautiful. I could continue, but you're yawning." Rick chuckles to hide a growing embarrassment because Michonne's eyes are on him. "I'm just her Rick."

RJ grabs Rick's face. His chubby hands flatten Rick's cheek. He tilts Rick's head left and right. Michonne refrains to laugh, and RJ is only imitating his grandmother.

"Oh!" He yelled with glee "there is love on your face, Doctor Richard. You're all red like a heart." RJ says in the loudest voice. "That's love." He finishes with a mocking giggle. "Red like a tomato." His forefinger pokes Rick's cheek. "That's love."

_Just blast it out there for the world to hear. _Rick can only afford silent shock. He quickly glances at Michonne who has the courtesy to pretend to have missed their son's grand conclusion.

"Pardon," Rick stutters.

"You're mama's boyfriend, Doctor Richard." RJ taps Rick's shoulder in a very comforting manner. He looks at his father for a few seconds and yawns. "I'm sleepy." He innocently declares.

"He is sleepy," Rick scoffs. "Goodnight, RJ."

* * *

Michonne and Rick leave the cleanroom at the same time despite Rick's best effort to avoid further awkwardness. Michonne leaves the chair by the glass window from where she can watch RJ sleep. Rick checks the charts for the tenth time hoping that Michonne will exit the room before him, but instead, she comes to stand next to Rick.

"You don't have the right to check his medical history, Michonne," Rick fondly says when Michonne attempts to read over his shoulder.

"What applies to me goes for you as well, daddy." She laughs at her joke.

"It's my department," Rick cockily says. "I have to check if there are no mistakes," he adds while he puts back the chart. "And they might be on something with the cleanroom."

"It's a good news," Michonne says with a bright smile.

To Rick's surprise, she does exactly what RJ did half an hour ago. Michonne frames Rick's face, and her thumb draws his smile.

"That is a genuine smile," She returns his amused smile. "There is happiness on your face," Michonne laughs and releases his face.

"That was absolutely unnecessary," Rick laughs and he holds the door open for Michonne to exit the room. He immediately follows her. "When RJ does it, I have an excuse ready."

Michonne laughs and she teasingly shoves Rick's shoulder. The pair walks next to each other with their grazing arms.

"What excuses?" Michonne gleefully asks. "And so I can use it the next time." She adds with a toothy grin.

"It's the pain medication," Rick deadpans. "Over a name," he cackles.

Michonne feels warm and relaxed. Perhaps, it is for that reason that her hand slips in Rick's one. Their fingers hesitantly intertwine. Neither Rick nor Michonne notices that thin veil of intimacy falling over their quiet laughs.

"I thought you would say crack," Michonne retorts. "So you kiss mama," Michonne chuckles. "The bird and the bees talk will be one for the history book if we can't explain something as simple as the use of a first name without being paired."

Michonne continues to laugh until Rick gently pulls on her arm. She softly collides with Rick's chest. Michonne groans and prepares to complain, but her well-put thoughts quickly disappear.

Michonne's nose is deep in Rick's scrub. His perfume is comforting and a balanced mixture between rich scents and babies.

_God knows for what reason he smells like an extra clean and powdered baby who is also a grown adult living a luxury life. _Michonne confusedly attempts to explain Rick's fragrance, but it has a soothing effect on her. She almost lacks the will to draw away from him.

"So I'm aware," Rick hooks his fingers under Michonne's chin and tilts her head until she looks at him. "Am I your boyfriend?" He adds with a teasing tone.

"You're just Rick, "Michonne whispers between giggles, which will render an enamoured teenager jealous. "Doctor Richard." She stands on her toes to be at the height _of stupidity. _Michonne wraps her arms around Rick's neck, and he delicately holds her small back. "And our son is a crackhead for…" Michonne's lips brush Rick's one, but the kiss never comes.

"It's a hospital corridor," Michonne silently curses at her immediate recognition of the voice. "Decency isn't a dead concept."

"Hotel rooms come at an extensive range of price no need to fall into exhibitionism,"

Michonne immediately pulls her hand away from Rick's neck. _Why me? Good timing…but why me._ She laments without breaking Rick's hold on her waist.

"Hmmm," Rick mumbles with confusion as he stares at the pair heading toward him.

"Here comes the reason why you can be glad not to be my boyfriend," Michonne breaks Rick's grip, and she rushes to leave a church recommended distance between Rick and her. "For what is worth, I miraculously turned sane."

"Sorry," Rick remains lost.

"Mom," Michonne says when the couple reaches them." Dad," she continues. "What are you doing here?"

Michonne's parents decide to ignore the question. They immediately direct their attention to the man by their daughter's side.

"Is it him?" Evelyn excitedly asks. "Of course, you're Carl's father with that face." She replies to her questions in the following second. "Baby, that is Richard." Evelyn grabs her husband's arm, and she shoves him before Rick. "Money well spent," she whispers in her husband's ear.

"Now, it makes sense why she calls him daddy." Michonne's father, Ryan Barnes, says without having the decency to avoid her daughter a premature death by prolonged embarrassment.

"Pardon?" Rick looks at Michonne with curiosity and begging for an explanation.

"Judith," Michonne tells Rick.

"Evelyn Barnes," She extends her hand when it becomes clear that Michonne will prefer to die than introduce her parents to Rick. "Your children's grandmother and Michonne's mother."

"Rick Grimes." Rick returns the greeting with his most charming smile. Michonne rolls her eyes. _The idiot is sealing my fate. _"Your grandchildren's father and Michonne's Rick." He adds with a touch of humour.

"Oh!" Evelyn and Ryan say at the same time.

"He isn't my boyfriend," Michonne retorts in anticipation for what her parents have concluded.

"But you call him daddy," Ryan pointedly looks at Michonne, and then he looks at Rick.

As if in symbiosis, Michonne and Rick widen the distance between them.

"Daddy?" Michonne laments. "Please," she pleads while aware that her parents have no notion of politically correct.

"Him or I," Ryan asks between laughs.

"Father, please." Michonne corrects, "Can you and mom pretend to be sane for a second?" She begs, "So I can introduce you to the man."

"Ryan Barnes," Michonne's father extends his hand for Rick to take. "Michonne's actual father since we share some titles."

"Rick Grimes, sir," Rick politely replies. "I swear that I'm only the father to my children." He adds, and Michonne's eyes roll in the back of her head. "As far as I'm aware your daughter calls me by my legal name."

"So you agree she shouldn't call you daddy," Ryan asks, and he is nothing short of amused.

_They like him… they like the idiot._ Michonne thinks with complete horror.

"Absolutely," Rick agrees. "And she doesn't call me anything but my god given name in my presence." He adds.

"There is no fun to that," Evelyn intervenes. "You're too young to be boring. A daddy here or a master there." She deadpans.

"Mama," Michonne cries for help.

"What?" Evelyn shrugs, "You can't go through life without some fun sprinkled here and there…" the sound of Rick's pager beeping interrupts the conversation.

"Well," Rick sighs, "I have an emergency," he announces while reading the information on the pager. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Mrs and Mr Barnes."

"Evelyn and Ryan," Michonne's parents quickly correct him. "If you don't mind being referred to as Rick. I know physicians like the ring of their title," Evelyn adds with humour.

"Rick will do just fine," He replies. "But an exception must be made around RJ. He is wrapping his mind around the concept of name."

"It sounds complicated," Evelyn says with a tone calling to prolong the conversation.

"We had the longest hour trying to explain why she can call me Rick…" Rick kindly begins to extend on the topic.

"I heard the word emergency," Michonne elbows Rick. "It must be more important than chit chatting with my mother." She places her hand on Rick's lower back and begins to lead him away from her parents. "Don't you have to run somewhere and stay there until my parents leave?"

"I do have to leave," Rick chuckles. "You should go rest," he softly tells her. "Can I…" he hesitates.

"Any day, you want until we sort a schedule." Michonne does not need verbal clues to know that Rick wants to spend time with his children.

"Thank you," Rick says with a heartwarming smile. Michonne swears his smile is enough to send her into heat. "And Go home," He adds with a bossy tone.

"When are you going home?" Michonne inquires because it oddly feels painful to watch him leave.

Caring for RJ side by side has unlocked sentiments, which she struggles to explain. She has moved from blind lust to intricate feelings.

"Tomorrow Maybe around twelve if I'm lucky." Rick replies. "Another nightshift."

"That will make two sleepless nights," Michonne says with concern. "The first one is all because of me."

"My record is four before I start hallucinating," Rick says to appease Michonne. "A good coffee can go a long way, and well, I was on daddy duty. I'm glad you called me."

"The coffee here is absolutely disgusting," Michonne recalls the taste of the insipid brewage.

"I'm aware." Rick agrees, and his name resonates in the corridor "I really have to go now. Third beeping and a microphone call. I'm going to find someone coding." Rick's expression morphs into a canvas of pain. Michonne watches him head toward the PICU, but he takes a few steps back "I almost forgot," He stops before Michonne. "Goodnight, Michonne." He kisses Michonne's cheek.

….

…

_This is ridiculous. I have had sex with this man. What is a kiss?_ Michonne chastises herself for the butterflies somersaulting in her stomach. She believes her heart will no longer beat at a normal rhythm. She stares at the exit door. Rick has left, and Michonne is in awe.

"He is smooth," Ryan says as he comes to stand near his daughter. "He is sweet on the eyes, and coming from a fellow pretty boy, it means a lot." He laughs. "I reserve judgement on white boys' shenanigans he did just now. Acting like Hugh Grant in those romcoms your mom's love so much." He rolls his eyes. "But your infatuation is justified. I like him. You should keep him." He finishes with conviction.

"Dad?" Michonne whines.

"I don't regret putting money into that graduating present." Michonne's father confirmed what she already suspected. Her father helped foot the bill for Rick's gigolo service. "We got three gorgeous grandchildren, and you might have a decent boyfriend."

"Dad," Michonne reiterates. "Mama is already insufferable. You're all I have left," She says with a pleading tone.

"I'm the censored version, sweetheart," Ryan pulls Michonne in a bear hug. "When the place is more private, your mother will speak about your little boyfriend."

"Thanks for the warning," Michonne growls, and she hides in her father's flank. "Now can everyone go home and think about no longer embarrassing your daughter in front of the father of her children..."

"No one embarrassed you, Michonne Jean Barnes." Evelyn intervenes. "We embarrassed your baby daddy, and he was good-sport about it," she adds matter of factly. "And before I forget, the good coffee shop near your daddy's office is open twenty four hours. No need to go into a blind coffee hunt," Evelyn says with a smile.

"Who said I need coffee?" Michonne argues.

Ryan and Evelyn look at each other, and they start to laugh.

"Don't be too mean when he starts to chase you. We like Rick. Goodnight, sweetheart. "Evelyn kisses Michonne's forehead.

"You met him ounce," Michonne sceptically declares.

"How many did it take you?" Ryan inquires. "Let's say we trust you on that one. You should too."

* * *

Rick sighs when he finds Shane on his on-call bed. He is not in the best mood for a conversation. His suspicions about being called to deal with a dying child were true. Rick drags his feet to the sofa, and he silently lies on it.

"Y'all are cute," Shane decides to speak after a pregnant silence.

"What are you talking about now?" Rick dispassionately asks.

"Your baby mama left a word for you and a comfort gift," Shane emphasizes each word. "And I almost stole some of it." He confesses, and Rick cocks an eyebrow. "It smelled so good. I dipped into the French pastry. I couldn't resist." Shane gives up all pretence. "I took two nothing more."

"Again what the fuck are you talking about because you lost me," Rick confusedly inquires. "I just lost a toddler." He sighs and scratches his head. "I'm out of the loop right now. Shitty night."

Shane nods, and he extends the pastry box to Rick. Sometimes, the little comforts make the most horrid things bearable. Rick's job can be maddening. Rick grabs a Madeleine, and the soft taste of lemon does comfort him.

"Michonne left," Shane announces.

"I know," Rick retorts, "almost three hour ago, when I got the emergency call."

"Twenty minutes ago," Shane corrects Rick's assumption.

"I asked her to get some rest," Rick sounds slightly irritated. "Michonne is worrying so much that I started to worry too." He yawns and wipes his tired eyes. "The lab results need to come out, and so everyone can get a clear picture of what needs to happen. I want my son out of that box and at home." Rick rants.

Rick does not dare to put the burden of his frustration on Michonne, and so Shane is the perfect ear to complain.

"I'm certain tonight she was worrying about you," Shane claims with a smile.

"Me?" Rick remains confused.

"Lucky bastard," Shane laughs, "you fucked it up but not as bad as I thought. Sasha was right on that one. Michonne still cares about your stupid self," He declares. "Your last stunt, I thought it was over."

"I didn't need a reminder," Rick argues. "The moment doesn't call for it," he complains. "I fixed my wrongs. We found a common ground."

"You fucked?" Shane deadpans.

"Shane, fuck off," Rick retorts. "We had a conversation," he clarifies." A needed one, and other conversations because our son could lose his life. Where does sex fit in such a narrative?"

Shane crosses his arm, and he curiously eyes Rick. _Everywhere… you have nothing better to do that to find quick comfo_rt. He thinks with a distance, which Rick lacks.

"I thought this was a reward for your hard and dedicated labor." Shane raises his cup of coffee toward Michonne. "Turns out it is because she is on friendly terms with you." He says with shock. "I like your future wife, Richard." Shane chuckles.

"A cup of coffee," Rick says with consternation. "What does it have to do with anything and even less a future wife?"

"Michonne brought you coffee, pastry, and a blanket. She says your kids sent the blanket." Shane pulls a candy pink blanket, and he throws it toward Rick. "I was calling bullshit until you denied having sex with her. The blanket is indeed from my goddaughter."

"Your goddaughter?" Rick repeats.

"Judith," Shane answers.

"Oh okay," Rick flatly says.

"Don't just say okay." Shane grabs another pastry. "Tell Michonne about it, and so I can play favorite without any shame," he adds, and Rick notices the hint.

"She is sleeping," Rick announces and puts his phone down.

"How do you know?" Shane is sceptical.

"I have texted her, and there is no answer." Rick replies.

"So where do we go from here?"

Rick looks at Shane, and he has been worrying about that specific question.

"We co-parent," Rick plainly states. "I remember not to blur the lines in my head. We think about Carl, Judith, and RJ. If I'm lucky enough, I come out of this unscattered. Michonne is out of reach. I think we're building a friendship. It is comforting to have her next to me. She is awesome. I can't be too greedy," He finishes with honesty.

"You're allowed to," Shane counters. "I'm falling for anyone who brings me coffee, pastries, and a blanket during a night shift." He laughs.

"I'm already on the floor," Rick says with amusement. "This is very Michonne of her to do." He smiles at the thought of Michonne. "She is very caring. I mean anyone who isn't blind can see she is gorgeous, but besides those obvious reasons to fall for her, she is extremely kind. I love learning parenting from her." Rick explains. "It doesn't scratch the surface. She has a weird sense of humour. She is trying to get me into comics because it's Carl's thing. I'm sure she convinced the kids to ask me for a pony. She has the most contagious laugh. I could go on for days."

Shane looks at Rick. He can only conclude one thing.

"That's love, Richard," Shane declares. "There is love all over your face."

"Oh great now you sound like RJ,"

* * *

Michonne looks at the Lys bouquet on her desk, and her smile grows wide. She only grows happier when she notices a basket next to the flowers. _Keep your head on your shoulder_. Michonne draws a deep breath. _Sasha sold me out. _She concludes when she explores the basket, and she can find all of her favourite candy bars and chocolate bars.

Michonne sits and removes her shoes. Rick Grimes made a horrible day of court hearing bearable. She pulls her phone and cannot resist the impulse to call him.

"You didn't have to," Michonne says as a greeting as Rick's sleepy voice fills her ear.

"Same for you," Rick counters. "I will need the bakery address. This is why you didn't have to bring me the best pastries in town," He teasingly adds.

"I did have to get you those. We finally have solved the mystery of Judith's obsession for French pastry. She hates cakes and anything of the sort, but she adores croissants, Madeleine, and I can't even pronounce the rest," Michonne laughs. Rick quietly enjoys the soft echoes of her joys. "Plus I had to deliver the blanket because Judith didn't see one the last time she slept there."

"How are they doing?" Rick inquires.

His tone is nothing but concern. Despite their best efforts, Michonne and Rick's conversation can easily become morose.

"Awfully," Michonne forgoes the lies for the plain truth. "I think I did a poor job explaining why…" she always struggled when she must mention RJ's leukaemia. "It's hard to explain the clean room thing."

There is a needed silence between Rick and Michonne. He rolls out of his bed finally emerging after an endless shift. Michonne picks her poison between the candies. Rick and Michonne take a deserved second to feel that even in silence they share a comforting bond.

"I could try my hand if it doesn't feel like undermining you," Rick suggests. "I have some experience doing it."

"I think it's crazy that you like your job," Michonne softly says. "Then I'm glad you do your job. I think of other parents in our situation and I'm glad they have you… if it makes sense." She says with slight embarrassment. "Forget it."

"I can't," He chuckles. "I had a very disappointing night, and you just made the aftermath bearable."

"Well," Michonne is glad she is where he cannot see her. "About our children," She returns to the topic. "I meant it when I said I would make space for you," She reiterates. "When do you want to speak to them?"

"Today I'm free. Well, I have to head to the hospital to spend time with RJ. I will see you there, and we can talk everything through." Rick replies.

"Maybe you can…" Michonne hesitates, and she does not want to rush anything. "You can spend the day with the children," she ultimately dares to offer.

"Pardon," Rick chokes on the following words.

Michonne panics, and she regrets trying to shove him into the perfect father role because he seems to be innately good at being a father. _One-step at the time. Don't rush into it. Don't stall it. Let it happen._ Michonne chastises herself.

"I shouldn't have offered. I mean you must be exhausted. I didn't think it through. They should spend the day with my parents anyway…" Michonne stumbles on words, and she rushes to correct the course of the conversation.

"Michonne?" Rick softly says, and his calm tone does the trick. "I wanted to make sure I didn't misheard the offer." He explains when she stops speaking. "I can have them for the day," Rick agrees.

"Are you sure?" Michonne doubtfully asks. "You don't have to do anything unless you feel ready to do it."

"I miss them," Rick plainly states.

Michonne cannot doubt the veracity of his claim. She hears his yearning.

"Are you home?" Michonne inquires, "I can have mom drop them by your house."

"Don't I need a baby proof home?" Rick seriously asks.

"You're a pediatrician. I'm sure you can't see there aren't babies." Michonne mocks Rick's panic. "Keep them away from sharp objects and anything you deem precious. They will either break it or lose it." She advises with an amused tone.

"Anything else," Rick asks and he searches for anything to take note.

"They are in love with you, and that is seventy percent of the work." Michonne attempts to reassure Rick.

"The thirty percent remaining," Rick rebounds on Michonne's claim.

"You are physically fit, and you love them. That is all you need to endure all the crackhead moves Judith's pull. Before I forget, Carl has a question every five minutes, and he wants you to watch him do the most boring amazing things." Michonne explains with seriousness. "How does that sound?"

"Scary," Rick sincerely replies. "We have three of those beings."

Michonne fondly laughs. She finds it odd how easily they slip in their respective roles. Their fight feels like a distant memory and shines by its immaturity. _Removing sex is all we needed_. Michonne regretfully admits.

"And we love each of them unconditionally," Michonne ends Rick's statement.

_I love you …_ Rick suddenly feels the growing need to say those words. If he ever doubted it, now, Rick is certain of his love for Michonne. However, it is also a danger to their dynamics.

"Don't get too mad if I perform poorly this time," Rick says with false amusement.

"To be sincere, it will make me slightly happy. If you struggle a tiny bit on that little first time. So I can have my he is not so perfect moment." Michonne confesses. "I want you to be an amazing father, but don't bruise my ego in the process."

Rick takes in Michonne's words. He finds it odd that she believes him good at his tentative to be a father. He is envious of the ease, which she shows while being around Carl, Judith, or RJ. Michonne is motherhood lived without complex. For the first time, Rick perceives her insecurities.

"Can I be equally sincere?" Rick feels embolden by Michonne's vulnerability.

"I'm all ears despite being on my paid time," Michonne's answers with a lighter tone, and she refuses for Rick to be too concerned to speak his mind.

"That is an unsubtle way to tell me to wrap this conversation up," Rick bluntly asks.

Michonne laughs. She knows her newfound jolly nature as a lot to do with Rick lifting some weight from her shoulders.

"Absolutely not," Michonne replies. "That was a compliment," she furthers underlines. "Only a selected group of people can hold my attention while I'm working, and you all share DNA." She declares, "What was your big confession, Doctor Grimes."

"This feels like a big test that I can fail," Rick says without preambles. "Jumping in being a dad is terrifying." He admits. "I spent the entire night watching RJ right after losing a patient. Normally, it sucks but I compartmentalize this aspect of my job." He struggles with explaining how dehumanizing medicine is. Nothing sticks after years of facing misery and death. "Last night, I couldn't remove myself. I only thought about RJ. I needed to keep an eye on him." He says, almost afraid of his admission. He does not want Michonne to have similar fears.

"Rj is fine." Michonne replies. "Remember the chart you don't want to let me see. They are better each time." She insists with conviction when Rick fails to hold his fear at bay.

"Again thanks for the coffee. I couldn't sleep a second. I was so worried he would wake up alone in that room. I was worried he would look for you, and I would not know how to get you to RJ. I had a scary night, and then when I was uncertain RJ had a peaceful night, I felt so relieved and proud when he was laughing in the morning." Rick relates, and Michonne hears echoes of love. "Then I didn't feel too proud when I had to leave him for a few hours because I'm his dad and have to be on the sideline instead of healing him."

"You're right where you need to be," Michonne coolly declares. "You know how scared of the needle RJ is, and you do that magical thing where you let him know that you're next to him. I can't do that. I break in tears right next to him." Michonne points out. "When he is terrified and so far it is every day, he does not need a Doctor. He needs you and no one else."

"I guess it is scary to know how being a parent can make you feel powerless when you can't offer what they need." Rick reflects, and he is not certain about those needs. "My big confession is that I'm afraid not to be good at fatherhood."

Michonne holds a breath. She thinks now she will never recover from his bluntness. It becomes evident that she will fall deeper and deeper for Rick.

"I wish I had that fear when I learned that I was pregnant." Michonne offers a piece of her. "That would have given me a good dose of reality. I would have worked on a few demons if I didn't think too highly of what I could offer as a mother."

"You're perfect," Rick says without a doubt.

"Because I allow myself to be afraid, but mostly, I try to bounce back when I don't do the most motherly thing." Michonne confesses. "And it happens. We both know we were acting less intelligently a few days ago. I have my own track record of unmotherly moments. I have very selfish feelings sometimes. I had those in that very hospital corridor." She noiselessly says. "Then I get afraid to be a bad mom and do my best to avoid it." Michonne draws a breath. "You're better than I was upon the discovery. I didn't want anything to do with the children, which I adore so much now. I didn't care about being a good mom. I was too traumatized and depressed. I was a bad mother by default for lack of better words. I had also the noble thought to find better parents for them. Lucky for you and me, I became scared to be a bad mom. I love them enough to be afraid." Michonne laughs. "Wew," she searches for words, and she does not speak about her postpartum depression with such ease. "You didn't sign up for me going off script," Michonne laughs to cover her self-awareness.

"I don't think you care to hear it, but I'm sorry I put you into some difficult time with my beautiful children. Thank you for not killing me on sight because I couldn't get my brain to function right." Rick sincerely says. "It's come super late, but why do you want, as a gift for your push day?" He inquires. "I would go with a trip to Tahiti. I will babysit for a week, and you can relax."

"You can't take a week of work," Michonne knowingly says.

"I can take up to a month," Rick argues.

"That sounds utopic," Michonne retorts. "Don't sell dreams to me."

Rick laughs, and he is unrealistically considering taking a vacation.

"Can I be a worshipful man without judgement?" Rick jokes.

"You sound ridiculous,"

"I'm in awe," Rick reiterates. _Nothing out of the ordinary, _"Do you know how much you make it easy for me to introduce my three children to my parents?" He asks." I can go with the edited version. Mom and dad here are your three gorgeous children. Look! We have a blond head like dad, and she is the brain leading her brother. Judith is brilliant, but I have no hand in it. She is her mother's daughter down to mannerism." Rick's laugh fills Michonne's ears. "Carl is adorable and looks nothing like his mom, and she silently hates me for getting a clone through her. She hides it well, but he is her favorite because he looks like me." He adds to taunt Michonne, and he certainly doesn't know how right he is. "And finally, you have RJ. I can't have a favourite, but I think just a bit because he has his mother's eyes and kindness. He is also so much of me." He speaks with so much softness of RJ that Michonne believes each word. "Now, you can stop nagging me. You have three amazing grandchildren." He laughs. "When they hit me with who the mother is, I can start with you should meet her. They will fall in love with you. And then no one is wondering how I suddenly have three children because they are busy nagging me about dating you."

"I'm not that charming. They might not fall in love," Michonne reigns on Rick's parade.

"Good taste runs in the family,"

"So does flattery," Michonne agrees. "Very Carl of you…" she smiles, and it is a shame Rick cannot see the beauty of it. "Now, I have to go. Openly wrapping the conversation," _before you said the right words and have me where I shouldn't be...in your sheet. _"Have a great day with your son and daughter." Michonne says.

"I will send updates and calls for help." Rick replies. "Good day, love." He makes a revealing slip. "I meant Michonne." Rick rushes to correct himself. "You're not love," he repeats. "You're Michonne not my love." Rick delicately digs his tomb. "Fuck, I'm coming out of a nightshift." He throws the poorest excuse. "Your name is Michonne."

"RJ is indeed your son," Michonne laughs, and Rick struggles only amuse her more. "I don't mind a nickname as long as it doesn't give you an aneurysm. Good day, Rick." Michonne hangs up

"I'm stupid," Rick comes to a needed conclusion. "And RJ is right. That's love."

* * *

Rick is breathless. Having two toddlers is divine punishment. He walks up the sofa and carelessly throws himself on the soft cushion. The creature inhabiting his nightmare also known as his daughter, Judith, comes to stand before him.

"What do you want for a truce?" Rick genuinely seeks the answer.

Judith does not say a word. She climbs on the sofa, and she comes to lie on Rick's chest. She immediately wraps her arms around him, and she hides her head in his neck.

"Don't just hug me after creating chaos." Rick pretends to maintain some severity. "That is an easy way out," his voice softens and kisses the crown of Judith's head.

"Doctor Richard, look!" Carl yells.

Rick's heart stops beating. He stares at his son who has climbed a bookshelf.

"Carl?" Rick softly calls for his son. "Please, don't jump." He pleads as he rushes on his feet with Judith holding onto him like a koala. "Your mother will kill me right after I die from fright."

"Daddy?"

Rick stops while he pulls Carl down the bookshelf. He must have misheard. _Wishful thinking..._

"Oh!" He carefully returns Carl to the ground, "Did you say something, sweetheart?" Rick turns his head to face Judith who pulls on his collar.

"Daddy," Judith repeats without missing a bit. Rick does not know how to react. "It's not a bad word," she rushes to explain.

"Doctor Richard?" Carl calls before Rick can form a new thought

"Yes, sweetheart." He looks for the little boy until he finds Carl climbing his leg. "Carl, why are you…" Rick gives up in trying understanding why his son has chosen him as the next point of ascension.

"Daddy," Judith whines, "I want to go pee,"

* * *

**Judith is calling me daddy...Help **Rick sends the message.

Rick's phone suddenly rings. On the screen lies Michonne's name. Rick draws a deep breath before picking the call.

"She heard me say it. Now, she is doing what every child does. She is repeating it. "Michonne does not lose a second.

"What do I do?" Rick sounds excited, anxious, and too happy to breathe.

Michonne laughs before the ridiculous nature of Rick's question.

"Rick, you're her father. Go with the flow and enjoy the day. Carl has climbed something. So start looking for him." Michonne knowingly announces.

"How would you know?" Rick reacts when he pulls Carl from the table.

"You're talking to me, and that is all he needs to climb something." Michonne replies.

"Turns out I'm what he chose to climb...help, love." Rick pleads.

Michonne laughs her heart out. She presumes Rick is in the middle of cyclones otherwise known as their children.

"Richard Grimes, they are five years old. You don't need my help." Michonne states.

"Okay… We were two when we made them. Shared orgasms should lead to shared parenting tips," Rick argues for fair treatment.

"There were three big heads. I have done my part." Michonne counters. "Look at your children's heads, and what was worth your orgasm. I have paid my dues." She reiterates.

Rick cannot keep his seriousness. He laughs to the point of tears.

"I will give you what you want," Rick decides to negotiate.

"You can't give me what I want," Michonne replies.

There is silence on both sides. Rick and Michonne understand the implications of her statement. _You. _Michonne wants him. She wants a happy family. Oddly, each wish seems to be the ruin of the other. Rick and Michonne inhale, and they remember what comes first.

"Have mercy. You son thinks I'm an indoor mountain." Rick switches the call to a video call.

Michonne holds a tear. She cannot tell her emotions. There are some regrets mixed to the purest form of joy.

"You look adorable. I can't believe you're Judith's favorite. I pushed her big head." Michonne laments when she sees her daughter glued to Rick.

"She is my little girl. Help," he says before tilting the camera toward Carl.

"Stop. It won't work." Michonne says and she decides to stand her ground. "I have work to do, Richard." She regretfully ends the call.

Michonne's peace does not last. Her phone rings. Rick sent her a message with a picture.

**I got Carl to join the cuddling and hugging. I'm no longer a begging man.**

Michonne stares at the picture for the longest. It becomes clearer why her feelings for him do not hold weight before what they are building. Michonne wants her children to have a family.

**What did you offer him? **She replies when she has pushed her sentiment away.

**Can't betray my client's agreeing terms. **Rick's response makes her laugh.

**You're such a dad… **_I love you_. Michonne does not send the three last words, but she can no longer deny them.

* * *

Rick helps Carl out of the car while Judith has decided never to leave his hips. He does not mind because he has five years to compensate.

"No one is going to tell Michonne anything," Rick looks at the appointed snitch, and Carl dares to smile brightly in response. "It's a secret," Rick makes sure to repeat.

"Who is Michonne?" Carl and Judith say at once.

"Your mama is Michonne," Rick plainly states.

"Mama is mama," The kids argue before the lunacy of their mother being anything else but their mom.

Rick blinks, and he exhales. He refuses to fight a losing battle. His children are stubborn, and _it's Michonne's fault. I'm perfectly reasonable._ Rick thinks without a doubt that specific trait comes from Michonne.

"Michonne is your girlfriend?" Judith asks with a squint.

"Not again," Rick mumbles, and he crosses the ice cream parlour door. "just pick your ice cream flavour," Rick capitulates." and don't say anything to your mom,"

"And Michonne," Carl says with glee. "It's a secret.

"Perfect," Rick ruffles Carl's hair.

"Eww," Carl complains. "I don't like it."

Rick looks at his son who spills the ice cream as fast as he puts it in his mouth.

"You wanted strawberry ice cream," Rick attempts to comprehend why the sudden disgust.

"For RJ," Carl pouts, and he is peeved about the situation. "He likes strawberries," he adds with an adorable frown. "I want this," He points at Rick's coconut ice cream.

"Carl, that is my ice cream," Rick states when Carl dips his spoon in the cup. "And I will go get you one." Rick says once facing eyes filled with tears. "I'm only going to the counter," Rick announces when Judith rises with him, and she demands that he carries her. "Fine," Rick picks his daughter from the floor. "Are you coming too, Carl?"

Carl shakes his head, and Rick does not need anything besides his son's mischievous smile to know the toddler wants to cause mayhem.

"Promise that you aren't going to explore the shop," Rick speaks from freshly acquired experience. "Carl?" Rick insists, and Carl surrenders, as the defeat is certain.

He offers his little finger for his father to shake.

"Good," he kisses Carl's forehead.

….

….

….

Rick watches Carl run toward him, and he frowns, unable to understand what devil is chasing his son. He catches Carl while keeping Judith's balanced in his hips.

"There is a weird lady," Carl whispers to his father.

Rick follows Carl's eyes to the table, and his son is right. He takes some steps forward to see who it might be. His displeasure rises when he sees her face.

"God help me!" Rick mumbles when he faces his ex-fiancé.

"It's a coincidence," Lori rushes to lie. "I wanted an ice cream."

_Getting a restriction order as soon as I can. _Rick wisely thinks.

"Hello," Rick coolly says, and he feigns kindness because his kids' eyes are on him. "I'm certain this isn't the counter."

"I wanted to say hello," Lori does not miss a bit. "Rick Grimes doing something else than working," she says rather bitterly. "You somehow found time."

Judith, very observant, takes in the back and forth between Rick and Lori.

"Daddy," She tugs Rick. "She is angry," she announces what everyone else quietly noticed.

"You did a bad thing," Carl adds his two cents.

"Carl and Judith grab your bag," Rick softly says while he returns Judith to the floor.

"Oh no need to leave because of me," Lori retorts. Rick cocks an eyebrow, and his patience begins to thin. "You can continue to have a great family day. Where is your girlfriend?"

"Michonne," Carl happily informs Lori.

"That's daddy's girlfriend," Judith proceeds to clear the context for Judith's name drop.

"I thought you were against having children," Lori mentions, and her angry eyes follow said children. "Here, you're…" She pauses, unable to understand. "Embracing it." She bitterly chuckles. "Maybe with this issue out of the way, we can…"

"Carl, grab your ice cream," Rick decides to overlook what Lori wants to start.

"And RJ's ice cream," Carl replies.

"We will get him another one," Rick continues to ignore Lori.

"Okay," Carl replies, "You promise," he extends his little finger.

"Rick," Lori forcefully grabs his arm.

Rick refrains from reacting besides prying his arm away from Lori's grip. He crouches to fix Judith's backpack. He hopes Lori can understand his lack of interest and leave. She does not move from her spot.

"We had every needed conversation," Rick noiselessly declares. "I'm being courteous instead of telling you to fuck off because my kids are here." He bluntly states. "It's over Lori." Rick reiterates. "I moved on, and truthfully, I had long before the engagement." Rick confesses. "I had a life where you could not fit."

"But they can fit," Lori cynically asks. "You would not make time for anyone but a sick kid, but you want to play daddy."

"Absolutely, they are worth changing my ways," Rick decides not to fall in the trap of endless argument.

"It won't end here, Rick," Lori announces when Rick starts to walk away.

"Try to create another of this coincidence, and I will ask for a restraining order." Rick immediately retorts.

"Enjoy playing house before you get bored of it." Lori disregards Rick's warning. "Or anything else happens."

"Have a good day, Lori." Rick coolly states as he leaves with his children.

"Daddy did something bad…" Judith declares with a conspiracy tone.

_When I didn't ask your mother out six years ago, I started this mess. _Rick thinks with distance to the past. He cannot tell what made him deal with Lori for several years. He believes it was a misguided attempt to have a family, and yet he never felt the desire to build one with Lori.

"You're absolutely right." Rick agrees with his daughter.

* * *

Rick and Michonne look at their children. Michonne climbs over Rick's desk, and she waits for him to speak.

"How do you want to do it?" Rick asks while he racks his brain for any sensible thought.

He hates how easily Michonne takes over his brain. She smiles, and he forgets himself. In the last days, Michonne has done a lot of smiling.

"In the most cajoling way," Rick pursues.

"Just go about it very subtly and we need Carl not to be anxious. He is everyone's big brother, and he really wants to see RJ." Michonne explains. "They could have video calls," She proposes the only feasible scenarios. "No they can't," her enthusiasm deflates. "Only sterile objects in the cleanroom."

"I can have it sterile." Rick retorts. "It's my department," he reminds Michonne.

"Not your patient," Michonne counters. "Only his Doctor can authorize things."

"I can fire Siddiq," Rick nonchalantly throws those words. "It is a phone, and they can have it sterile, love."

"So much for ethics," Michonne laughs. "You're always watching over their shoulders."

"That's a low blow," Rick feigns offence.

"And you're still standing," Michonne replies. "It was a semi-decent punch,"

"Well," Rick says with amusement. "Let my power be of use." He proudly states. "I can't speed up the testing process, but I can have the triplet virtually reunited," He finishes. "RJ will need it tomorrow,"

"What?" Michonne anxiously asks.

"He has a marrow aspiration schedule tomorrow," Rick reminds Michonne, and her visage immediately morphs. "That will go fine." Rick reaches for Michonne's hand and moves to stand before her.

"Is it going to be as painful as the other time?" Michonne shivers at the memory of a needle piercing her son's bone.

"It will go fine," Rick declares. "I will ask Maggie to do the aspiration. She does it on babies, and so she is far gentler as anyone can be," He reassures Michonne.

"Can he keep that phone through the entire day?" Michonne inquires, and she wants RJ to have anything to distract him.

"He won't need it much," Rick replies. "I'm going to hold his hand through most of the day."

…

…

…

"RJ's ice cream," Carl reminds his father for the tenth time of the day.

"What did I say about secrets," Rick whispers while Michonne stands across from the father and son duo.

"Not to tell Michonne," Carl yells

"Michonne?" Michonne's ear perks.

"Daddy's girlfriend," Judith supplies the answer.

"First names are foreign concepts to them," Rick rushes to explain.

Michonne shrugs, and she knows so well that one must choose his battles with a set of stubborn toddlers. If the triplets have decided that the first name's use is the requirement for dating, so be it. Rick Grimes is her boyfriend. Michonne is Rick's girlfriend. Yet mama and Doctor Richard are nothing but friends…_ make it make sense_. Michonne thinks with amusement.

"What secrets?" Michonne suspiciously eyes the boys.

"Nothing," Judith says as she rushes to cover Carl's mouth.

_A treat in my rank. _Michonne rolls her eyes, and she cannot believe how fast Judith picked her role of daddy's girl.

"Judith?" Michonne calls in shock. "So much for girl power," she laments.

"Let's focus," Rick says as he picks Carl from the floor, and he sits him on the chair facing Rick's desk. Michonne does the same with Judith.

"Your mother told me that you missed RJ," Rick states as he takes a spot on his desk next to Michonne. "That is a bit normal, and he misses you too." He adds to comfort his kids. "He wants to be with you and play at all the games, but for a little while, he has to wait."

"Why?" Carl displays his anguish.

"RJ is sick," Rick plainly states, and Michonne looks at him questionably. "Let's think of him like superman," Rick starts to explain. "Do you know superman?"

"No," Carl and Judith reply.

"We need to have a conversation." Rick judges Michonne.

"They know Krypto," Michonne retorts, and Rick seems confused by her statement. "Superman for toddlers. Krypto the super dog." She clarifies.

"Well, Krypto is super strong, but sometimes, he gets sick if he is around some kryptonite." Rick tentatively says.

"Yes," Carl replies.

"RJ is the same. He is super strong, but there is something making him sick in the air. Until we beat it, RJ has to be in a magic box to protect him." Rick explains most thoroughly. "Because it is magic, we cannot go inside, but we can talk to him."

"You would love to talk to RJ, right?" Michonne intervenes.

"Can I see the magic box?" Carl asks with enthusiasm.

"Maybe later," Rick says and ruffles his son's head.

"But the ice cream," Carl immediately whines.

"Your mother is getting everyone some ice cream," Rick announces. "Very expensive ice cream from Germany." He specifies.

"Me?" Michonne inquires.

"It could be a pony," Rick smirks. "You put them to it."

"And I regret nothing," Michonne proudly declares.

* * *

Carl and Judith rush before Michonne's phone, and they grab it with excitement when they hear RJ's voice. Michonne sits behind her two children, and they rest their heads on her.

On the other side of the screen, RJ sits on Rick's lap, and he is happily waving at his mom and siblings.

"Me, first," Carl tells Judith. "Rj," he says with a giggle. "Doctor Richard has a girlfriend." He adds with a whispering tone.

"Mama kisses Doctor Richard." RJ returns the confidence with another secret.

"Eww," The triplets yell simultaneously.

Michonne and Rick sigh. How low can one fall to become the topic of gossip for five years old? The pair quietly exchanges many looks through the headless conversation of their children.

Rick can only laugh when Carl reveals how he negotiated ice cream for his siblings. Michonne begins to think about how she can turn the table on him.

"And your mama is getting you a dog," Rick blurts before Michonne can proceed.

Michonne swears he can read her mind. She immediately blushes at the thought because her mind is full of random moments when she yells how gorgeous he looks.

"Richard," Michonne laments. "Don't give them ideas. We don't need a dog."

"But mama," RJ says in a lamenting tone. "Dogs are beautiful." He adds while Rick whispers propaganda in his ears.

"Dogs are big," Carl joins the begging party.

"Mama," Judith looks into her mother's eyes. "Dogs are best friends."

Michonne sighs and wishes she would hate Rick Grimes. Until she gives in, Michonne will have to deal with her children talking about dogs. They are already deep in the conversation. Michonne loses the notion of time. Carl, Judith, and RJ have the most random conversations. She cannot make sense of anything.

She enjoys her children's laugh. Michonne stares too long at Rick's smile. He is more fluent at kids' gibberish than she is. Rick appears to make significant contributions to the conversation.

In the back of Michonne's mind, there is a nagging thought. She could have this family. However, she refuses to take the wrong step. Once, she almost ruined it. _Platonic…_ Michonne reminds herself what her relationship with Rick has to be.

_Platonic _even if she can no longer doubt how much she is in love with Rick.


	12. ch

Hello,

There is no update, sorry, and there won't be any updates for a long time. I will be taking an indefinite hiatus with my Richonne fics. I'm in a situation where I don't know if I want to publish the already written chapters of those fics at some point in time, I won't delete my fics for now.

Why am I taking a hiatus? I have little to no time to write 300 words in a day to day life. However, I manage to produce a chapter every eternity, and I expect something in exchange. Reviews, because it helps to shape the story. It helps to keep me excited. It helps knowing that there is an interest in the fic. I don't even care if the Review is in English, French, Spanish, Italian, mandarin, or Portuguese. It makes me happy to have feedback and I will probably understand those languages too. I will welcome criticism as well, but follow and fav do not replace reviews. They mostly add to the offense because it makes the writer aware of those silent readers, who often become vocal to comment "update soon" or "I will stop reading because you're not writing the story like I perceived it in my head."

However, I rarely get reviews who don't ask me for an update. What I get is people following complete fics. (For what purpose, I can't tell.) I also have people reading silently. I start to think that my fics are subpar. Producing mediocrity does not sit well with me even if writing is a hobby. If there is no audience or a ghost audience, I cannot use my non-existent time in a wasteful manner. To everyone, who reviews through more than a chapter, thank you for pushing me so far. To those who actually come to my tumblr pm to tell me what they love or hate in my fics. Thank you. That being said,I will go on a break. We can all be silent.

Elsa


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